The Beer Engine

What if I told you…..one man…..was trying his hardest…..to write the GREATEST SHOW NOTES OF ALL TIME?! I would ask you where can I find that man and how much can I pay him to get out of this. Alas, it’s just me writing the show notes again. On this week’s show, we talk about some stuff or whatever….just kidding we barely even did that. We talked some basketball, Tony is breaking free from lockdown (for a Doctor’s appointment?) and Griff is back drinking some serious whalez. Some big news in the “seasonal seltzer” category and Sonic is out with some confusing flavors now too? Wow, look at all of that seltzer news! Also, “Hoooopppppssss innnnnnn spppaaaaaaace” means you have to pay $23 for a 4-pack of Sam Adams. Finally, one of our harder Untrappd games as Tony goes after some classic stouts to avoid the ultimate punishment during “No Nut November.” OK COOL see ya.

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Hey gang! Wow we made a mess of this one. Actually it’s not our fault, I blame the guys over at Cox Communications for throttling my internet. What dickheads! Honestly we had a good run of it for a while with some good riffing at the beginning, then we meandered into some good beer talk even.  Tony gets excited for the release of Truly Australia edition and Griff dreams of a delicious Aperol Spritz. Griff loses his mind about the cost of beer news these days, and finally, a very spoopy Treehouse of Hhhorrorssss inspired by Treehouse beer puts Tony to the test. Also Griff loses count of the game and ruins the WHOLE MONTH OF THIS OR THAT UGH!!!! 

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It is difficult to write a synopsis, especially when there is pleasure in letting a nontraditional story unfold.  The listener should go into this with no expectation.  Every re-watch will guarantee new clues. This is an anti-commercial podcast  so most listeners will hate it.  It was made as an experiment. While Griff was patching together notes, he realized that there can be a great tragic story within this environment, and so he decided to stylize this podcast and to move the slapstick elements into a project that is tentatively called “Turkeydick Cockpunch.”

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh another week of podcasts! I have to ….what is it you guys do? Mow the lawn, sleep in my bed, fold some laundry, make my dinner, play an RPG, download some uh apps? Well you can listen to this while you do it. Today, the guys had some killer riffs (weedillyweedillyweeeeeeeewwwwwww) - get it like a guitar? Our fans tithed by providing us some vegemite pizza content, and we tapped the Discord mailkeg with some very serious and important questions. Also, the guys break down some new seltzer with a sort of...provocative marketing campaign, and bring on their marketing expert to answer questions like “should you lead your seltzer brand awareness campaign with full bush?” Finally, a 3-man weave of a game about spoooOOOOOoOOOOoOOOoOoky beers. OK BYE get back to folding your underwear with the blown out holes in the crotch! Bye!

Oh no! It’s just Griff and Tony this week! Oh god what the hell I’m so depressed… So anyway what is up gang?? Nothing? OK I figured. This week, the guys cover a myriad of topics (you’re welcome!) including [reading notes] Goose Island Bad??? Topo Chico Margarita! Fresh hop pilsner! And so on. The guys also play a very exciting game of “This or That” where Tony is forced to decipher real hops from the hops that are generated by Griff’s magic BRAIN. Good luck you son of a gun!!!

BANG! There’s the download booster. Should have gotten Guyscaped or Manstuff to sponsor this shit. On today’s show….not very much beer discussion (standard). The father of Vegas podcasting, Brian Mollica, returns and gives his thoughts on a variety of topics, including bourbon for children, NFL parlays and what you’re allowed to steal when you’re a teenager. Brian and Griff break down the intricacies of playing “Free Bet Blackjack” and I think at some point Tony made up a lot of the history of Australia. At the end, there is a classic showdown between the old friends and rivals,  Tony and Brian, to see who can guess which Pumpkin items are *actually* made at Trader Joe’s. You guys are gonna like this one….probably. OK see ya!!!

HELLO! I was just watching that Halloween episode of The Simpsons that is themed after “The Shining” and Homer opens up the door and says “HELLO!” so just say it like that in your head. On today’s show, we introduce the impromptu segment “Hyper Australia Dork Shit News.” Some serious activity on the Discord channel (which you can join very easily) means it gets it’s own drop, and the mailkeg asks us about what beers made us sad :(. Also, Griff mixes up Pastrybot with Lagerbot and maybe learns something about himself along the way. Then, SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES SAM ADAMS RELEASES BEER THAT’S ILLEGAL TO SELL IN 15 STATES [error] [error] ---transmission ended---

Oh man! More show notes??? I guess whatever. On today's "welcome back" episode, Griff fawns over the deadly insects of Arizona….and some of their beer too. The guys mine the Discord for some free content and talk some gambling wins for Griff and some AFL screw ups for Tony *foghorn*. Tony hops back on the Deeds bandwagon, Griff is drinking English Mild, and the Lager of the Week heads to Italy for some soup, salad AND breadsticks?? Some big seltzer news drops mid-show, the plaid seltzers return, and the Greg Koch of Australia sells out. Then, our new field reporter hops on to give us an update on baseball stadiums and beer. Finally, a very strange edition of "News: the Game" that has some faults but hey it's all fun right??? Okayyyyy see ya!

HelloooooooOOOoooOOOOOOOooo! Another day, another dollar down the toilet. I think it may cost us at least one dollar every time we do this show in penalties from the US government. Thanks guys! On today’s very looooooooong special episode, Griff breaks down his failure to buy Flamin’ Hot Mountain Dew, Tony mourns the downfall of Runza University Football and Joe Rogan has taken ill and applied a  treatment plan matching that of  William Henry Harrison after his inauguration speech that was almost as long as this episode (oh no!). Beers of the week, lagers of the week, hyper nork deer burp spit dues?? It’s all in there gang, don’t worry! Then Griff goes full Drew Carey on your ass with a new Price is Right version of Untrappd. This would USUALLY end the show but Tony had to get wild on some Paralympics and Aussie Rules gambling that sent some MORE money into the terlet. Thanks Obama!!!!!!

[Quick warning even though I know you guys don’t read the show notes, but the first about 20 minutes of this show is Griff reading some extremely gross Facebook posts. If you don’t want to hear it because poop stuff isn’t funny to you, well, skip ahead about 20 minutes].  Helloooooooo (echo echo echo). Anyone out there? Oh yeah you’re all out there. Cool! The fellas dig deep this week into the content oil fields and find some amazing material about Hard MTN DEW, Melbourne’s most hated Dick (and Pusey) and a big update on pie flights. Actually we didn’t do any of that because our very kind listeners went ahead and fed us that content on Discord. Well that’s a freebie! There was some hyper beer dork news about Harpoon Dunkin Co-labs. Yummy scrummy. And finally a “This or That” that has Griff throwing himself into his self-immolating car and driving over to the Sunset Station. Gotta go!! K byeeeee!!!