The Cartoncast

The Cartoncast

By Ben and ZaneComedyTV & Film
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The Cartoncast episodes

  • 184 - Bootlegg'd - Rise of the Guardians
    Happy… Easter? Yeah, this is another ostensibly Holiday movie, but really
    it’s an Avengers-style story of a team of superpowered mythological beings
    that unfortunately had to compete with the actual Avengers. These Guardians
    guard children’s dreams, hopes, and teeth against the literal Bogeyman with
    some impressive flair. Unfortunately this rabbit laid a big goose egg, but
    inside that egg was a fine movie.
    1 hr 33 min
  • Unshell'd - Dirkman Pitstain's New Year's Bash!
    When the boss calls in an action hero for one last mission, there’s no way
    he can turn them down. But what if that hero has no idea that the mission
    exists, and falls into a few other missions along the way? Dirkman Pitstain
    doesn’t know, and he sure isn’t going to find out. Unlike avocados (sp?),
    there’s no bad time to enjoy his festivities.
    1 hr 20 min
  • 183 - Holiday Episodes
    Cartoons have an interesting relationship with holiday specials. They tend
    to coincide with an animation and writing bump, but also have to navigate
    passing on those good feels without compromising their identity. Though
    it’s a mixed bag, today we look at three properties - Charlie Brown,
    Futurama, and Rugrats - to see how they handle the beast that is the
    Holiday Special.
    1 hr 37 min
  • 182 - Bootlegg'd - The Life & Adventures of Santa Claus
    For a guy who can travel the world in one night, Santa sure doesn’t know
    how to pace a movie. But like all of his traits, it’s endearingly innocent
    in a world that is working overtime to make sure that he’s protected from
    it. Check out this good boy and his annoying friends develop the Santa
    Mythos. Also a 90-second war.
    1 hr 34 min
  • 181 - Bootlegg'd - Eight Crazy Nights
    The era of Adam Sandler is firmly in the past, and looking back on his
    popularity is a dizzying experience. He used his notoriety as “The Hannukah
    guy” to create an animated movie about the meaning of Hannukah. At least,
    that’s the concept. In execution, it’s just a whole lot of Adam Sandler
    without any physics or logical consistency slowing him down. If you
    actually enjoyed this movie, that’s a technical foul.
    The Hannukah Song
    Adam Sandler’s “Cock and Balls” skit
    Hannukah is unimportant, trust me on this
    Rat in a Hot Tin Can
    ”I wanna Kiss you all ovah” - last Adam Sandler reference I swear
    Tim Heideker’s Rogan imitation is spot on
    Big Brother is more than a 1984 dystopia
    Klaus graphic novel
    Jon Lovitz in the Simpsons
    Pooping deer in Castle Crashers
    Patton Oswalt’s immortal heckler takedown
    1 hr 53 min
  • 180 - Bootlegg'd - Cinderella III: A Twist in Time
    Ben and Zane felt like something was off. They had a weird sense of Deja
    Vu, and their hands were real sweaty every time they picked up mice. Brie,
    the Cartoncast’s Fairy Godmother, revealed to them that time had been
    turned back, and they would have to re-watch Cinderella if they wanted to
    get out of it alive. It was good. Not great, but fun. And now they could
    get back to what’s really important: catching mice and training them to
    dress up and sing.
    0 min
  • 179 - Yuri on Ice
    It was that time of year again, when the world was focused on Men’s Figure
    Skating. It was a hot and steamy competition so far, with everyone
    stimulated by the athletes, who themselves were clearly aroused by the
    competition. Ben and Zane did their best to keep score, but with only the
    barest knowledge of skating, they were reduced to the “hot or not” scale.
    They gave mediocre scores overall, especially since much of the routines
    were censored for the “family values” crowd. A winner was chosen by a
    surprisingly generous Russian judge.
    1 hr 17 min
  • 178 - Arcane
    Ben and Zane were due at the Hex-tech Animation Symposium in Piltover, but
    a wrong turn sent them to the undercity. Thankfully, a local known only as
    “Lucky Tim” offered to show them around. The undercity was vibrant, even if
    it lacked the refinement of the privileged class. All in all, a good
    detour, topped off with a surprise appearance of Imagine Dragons in The
    Last Drop.
    * Best diss that will ever exist
    * Get Jinxed
    * Beefy Joker
    * Unfortunate attempt at multiculturalism at Hogwart’s
    * “Do it for her”
    * Blitzcrank
    * The least subtle movie in existence
    0 min
  • 177 - Scrambl'd - The Gumby Show
    All was not well in the Cartonland. Ben and Zane couldn’t quite put their
    fingers on it - literally. Their fingers were gone, along with their
    clothes and a lot of their finer details. The world moved along at a choppy
    place, they could scarcely hold onto their own shapes, and they could feel
    their eyes bend. While in this state, they could barely leave their rooms -
    which turned out to be fine, because their rooms had the raddest stuff
    imaginable: marbles, mirrors, rolling pins, gears, and gum.
    0 min
  • 176 - Voltron: Defender of the Universe
    Ben and Zane dropped the ball yet again. Instead of watching a show, they
    accidentally watched a fan dub of some show from Uruguay. What’s it about?
    Hard to say. There’s definitely explosions and feral cats, but beyond that
    it’s uncertain. The Cartoncasters decided that instead of talking about it,
    they would instead riff on Power Rangers, a bold step forward in
    merchandising unrelated media.
    0 min

About The Cartoncast

From the publisher's feed

As we describe it, this is the '8th grade lit paper' of cartoon podcasts. It involves a deliberate investigation to what makes old cartoons tick, and a healthy respect for digression. Also eggs.