The Comedy Button

For our 50th episode not-so-spectacular, we talk about taking pictures of our butts as kids, Brian gives all his stuff away, Anthony hunts for tarantulas, no one understands how Max can have an Indian half-brother, everyone tells a sewer story, Brian is an upstanding citizen, we realize that we're getting old, we remember our weird neighbors, we rock out to L. Ron Hubbard's horse jams, Tom Cruise still sucks, Ryan hates the beach, we break down the science of DuckTales, and some podcasts will always be more awesome than ours. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

This week, we consider the logistics of having sex in space, note that San Francisco is full of either tons of homeless people or werewolves, share some clown facts, express our feelings about less-abled people, have some plunger problems, read some Amazon reviews, recall our most favorite (and most brutal) middle school fights, discuss the things that should never be used in a store display case, learn all about face-slapping massage treatment (seriously -- this is a real thing), and talk up the annual Podcast Awards. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

This week, we talk about impossible expectations for journalism, play "Indian Food or Star Wars Character," discuss the wild and wacky goings-on during the average San Francisco morning, get bored with our futuristic toys, reminisce on how crazy New York can be, laugh at dumb pigeons, laugh at dumb cartoons (and their marketing campaigns), choose between our theoretical daughters banging either Bret Michaels or the high school football team, read the worst revenge letter ever, hate on bad candy, talk about our froo-froo toys, and investigate some bedroom mysteries. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, and Ryan Scott.

This week, Ryan tries to get healthy, Mike & Ike break up, weird classmates turn into weirder adults, Max and Anthony go to Toys R Us (and deliver a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles history lesson), Max winds up at a sad mall again, we ponder how animals pleasure themselves, Ryan shares his meticulous Indiana Jones notes, and we imagine a world without Guy Fieri. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

We took a week off, so get over it! But now we're back to talk about awkward Tahoe trips, beer-buying logistics, the Beverly Hills Chihuahua 3 wrap party, autopsy animals, Brian's Charlotte's Web fan fiction, the Disney Concentration Camp, shoplifting from K-Mart in the '90s, what life is like in the Mrs. Doubtfire house, Kickstarters for sci-fi trash heaps, bad advice for bullied kids, lethal furniture, and insane Lego savants. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Apologies in advance for the audio screwiness this week. To make up for it, we tell you all about our trip to the zoo with our second VIP listener, where we watched a prison riot in the gorilla pen, learned about Max's fear of spiders, tried to steal pretzels from kids, took some low blows for the camera, acted like dirty thieves, met the world's funniest goat, and witnessed a race riot in the polar bear pen. We also find out why some of us would make horrible (or awesome) parents, Anthony whips out his metal detector, we discuss awkward re-gifting options, and Max tells us about his now-slightly-more-awkward work life. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Davin Loh.

This week, we have the most athletic intro ever, mourn the loss of Nintendo Power, mourn the loss of the Sears Wishbook, share our Christmas wishes, learn one mustache's origin story, discover we're too old for Pokemon, recall our parents beating the crap out of us, beg Hollywood not to remake Problem Child, get angry at pretentious art, poop in space, learn how our special guest met his fiancee, learn about one cool band, and share Sweden bathroom stories. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, and Max Scoville, with special guests Samuel Claiborn and Mike Drucker.

This week, Max has a terrible werewolf movie pitch, Anthony gets hit on, the Golden Gate bridge gets hot and heavy, nurses rave about cat tranquilizers, Brian shoots himself, Max accidentally blows it, Scott discusses the horrors of Disneyland, we roll our eyes at Velcro wallets, we rant and rave about terrible reality shows, Anthony geeks out about Star Wars Celebration, we open some early Christmas presents, and Scott relays the secret history of one very special Vanilla Ice song. Starring Scott Bromley. Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

Sex in the 1920s, live Harry Potter puppet shows, the Home Alone Band, reviews for nature trails, Ryan Scott's Excellent Virginity Adventure, the early days of cybersex, pithy email responses, Anthony's new OkCupid initiative, getting excited over household appliances, the continued ruination of the English language, number 2, sewer-worthy silverware, and extracurricular creativity. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

This week's episode is all about our first group trip to California's Great America theme park, which included trashy people, some wild dancing, whorish preteens, a sweet airbrushed t-shirt, and garbage disguised as food. We also get an email from our saddest listener, hear the craziest story ever (courtesy of this week's special guest), and get some Anthony-targeted love advice from one of our female listeners. Starring Scott Bromley, Brian Altano, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville, with special guest Greg Tarascio.