The Couples Expert

In the 95th Episode of The Couples Expert Podcast Stuart talks about ways to take your good relationship and make it truly great relationship. The truth is, greatness resides in all of us; you merely need to know how to tap into it and bring it out. Each relationship has room for improvement, and if you listen today, you will learn that even if you think your relationship is going fine, it’s good, you can make it even better. Shoot for the stars!

Quote:” When someone else’s happiness is your happiness that is love.”

When you’re in a great relationship, you and your partner are so in synch, so close and connected that you are each other’s happiness. All of the love and emotion that you feel is linked to your partner. If they’re sad, you feel it. You share both joy and sorrow together.  All the negative and positive emotions are felt by both of you and your main purpose in life is to make each other happy. Your relationship will take priority over anything else that’s happening and your mission in life is to have that relationship with your partner where you feel connected, close, and important.

Tune in to Episode 95, Turning A Good Relationship Into A Great Relationship.

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Tune in to the 94th Episode of the Couples Expert Podcast! In this episode Stuart and his special guest talk about the latest innovations in research and information on love and relationships. This podcast is all about some newer therapeutic tools and techniques that are being used to help individuals and couples. Especially those who have had trauma or suffering in their past.

 “Eventually you will come to understand that love heals everything, and love is all there is.” – Gary Zukav

When it comes to healing, no matter what you’re healing from love is the answer.

Because wiith love, everything is easier, you don’t feel alone, and you can trust the one you love to support you and be there for you and help you as you heal. Sometimes it’s the mere presence of the one you love that makes you feel secure and safe. The love that you and your partner share helps you to heal from past hurts and allows you to look ahead towards the future.

Stuarts guest on the show this week is Jackie Leger, LPC. Jackie recently joined the Couples Experts as part of the clinical staff. She specializes in EMDR therapy. EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. This therapy model is being used extensively for trauma and PTSD sufferers with excellent results. This is used in conjunction with traditional talk therapy with great success.

Click here to view the complete show notes

In this episode of the Couples Expert Podcast Stuart will talk about someone he greatly admires, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Dr. King’s life and message was all about love, peace and affecting change without violence. These are attributes that are definitely still needed in the world today. Stuart talks about some of the lessons he learned about love from Dr. King

Stuart discusses some of the lessons he learned about love from Dr. King. Whether you remember Dr. King, and the incredible impact he had on this country during the era of the Civil Rights Movement, or not; even if you’re in the generations that have grown up since his untimely death in 1968, his influence and his great words still echo down through history. Love is the answer.

What you will learn today:

• How authenticity is needed in our relationships at 12:05
• What to do when you are triggered or argue 14:30
• Why you should fight for connection 15:28
• What having a peaceful home can do for you 17:50
• What a dream for your life can be 20:06

The takeaway from the message of Martin Luther King, Jr. is that love in action is the most powerful force in the Universe. That hate meeting hate, anger and violence meeting anger and violence only creates more of the same. What we need is to put love in action in our everyday lives, with our partners and our family and friends.

Quote:  “Wars are poor chisels for carving out peaceful tomorrows.” MLK

To read the full show notes click here

In this episode of The Couples Experts podcast, Stuart welcomes Couples Expert Kelsey Blythe to discuss issues surrounding being prepared for marriage and setting yourselves up for a lifetime together in a happy and successful marriage. Kelsey is new to the Couples Expert staff, and has been a warm and wonderful addition to the team. She is running the premarital program at the Couples Experts and we’re very happy to have her on board. Kelsey herself has recently gotten engaged to be married so she will be speaking on a personal as well as professional level on the topic of premarital counseling. Take a listen!

In this episode you will learn:  

• Why working on and maintaining your relationship is vitally important at  9:50
• How you can be proactive about problems at 13:40
• Premarital counseling helps couples do more than work out details about the marriage, it helps them decide about their commitment at 17:30
• A custom program for couples that contains EFT(Emotionally Focused Therapies) focuses less on  content than the connection between the couples at 19:30
• What a premarital counseling session is like at 22:00
• Why having a counselor as a resource throughout the marriage is helpful  25:57

Premarital counseling can help couples to prepare for their marriage by opening up discussion on topics ranging from finances to family planning. Couples learn how to communicate on a deeper level and are prepared to navigate the bumps in the road that inevitably come during marriage.

Click here to read the complete show notes

In episode 91 of The Couples Expert Podcast!  It’s the last show for 2016 and Stuart is discussing how to set realistic and meaningful relationship goals for the New Year. We all want to do better and be better and the New Year is the new beginning that many of us use as a jumping off point for furthering our goals. The Couples Experts would like to thank you for a great 2016. Take a listen while Stuart discusses some ideas for 2017. 

What you will learn in this episode: 

• Why we set goals instead of resolutions (12:20) 

• Goals are promises you make to yourself (15:00) 

• How to follow up and check in with your partner regularly  (16:18) 

• What you should include in your goal lists (21:15) 

• Some important suggestions for your growth as a couple.(32:00) 

• Share your lists and compare together  (33:50)

You can also subscribe to 3 Minutes With Stuart on the Couples Expert YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsqIoIdClWx1kGXXg0phnqg

Read the show notes online here

In this special holiday edition of the Couples Expert Podcast, Stuart talks about his interfaith family and gives us a look inside how interfaith couples navigate the unique challenges that come at the holidays.

In this episode you'll learn:

• Standing up for your traditions is important ([9:03])
• It is possible to blend two religious traditions into one celebration  ([10:40])
• Helping those less fortunate can lift your holiday spirits ([15:30])
• This is a great time to make amends and repair relationships  ([18:00])
• Interfaith families have a unique responsibility to educate their children in both faiths  ([20:25])
• The richness of partners and families sharing faith and tradition ,the Hanukkah story. ([21:40])
• Some important takeaways related to family traditions at the holidays ( [29:50])

Tune in and enjoy!

Click here for the complete show notes

The 89th episode of the Couples Expert Podcast is all about Baby Boomers and the Empty Nest. Join Stuart as he discusses all the changes that couples go through when sending their kids out on their own for the first time.

Stuart talks about how we raise our kids and prepare them to be on their own and the challenge of transitioning from full-time parenting to being a full-time couple. Couples need to spend some time preparing for this eventuality. Stuart gives you some tips on how to do that.

In this episode you will learn: 

• The Empty Nest transition can be an emotional time
• Roles change and we need to redefine who we are in relation to our adult children- Stuart discusses the emotions and challenges that accompany this transitional time.
• Planning for this time helps with the emotions and changes; a lot of couples forget about that.
• One of the most positive things about being an empty nester: We can focus on ourselves and our relationship with our partner.
• We can pursue our dreams and our “Bucket List” together- What are some of the things you want on the list?  This is the time for you and your partner to discuss your future plans and get together on what you want to do in the future. Do you want to travel, retire; sell the house? Whatever it is that you want to do, you have some decisions to make. Make your “bucket lists” now so you don’t miss out on what you’ve always wanted to do.

To view the complete show notes click here.

Episode 88 of The Couples Expert Podcast is a special podcast because it touches on something deeply personal for Stuart. He talks about raising a child with a chronic illness or special needs and how the love and support of the family are needed in order to accomplish this.

Stuart’s daughter was born with a disorder called Esophageal Atresia/Tracheoesophageal Fistula (EA/TEF for short). Stuart and Sarah’s mom had incredible challenges in raising her. They had to adapt , learn and overcome so much in Sarah’s early childhood.

No parent would wish to have a sick baby, but when that happens, there is a shift in what’s important in a parent’s life. Stuart and Sarah’s mom were her staunchest advocates and there was more than one time that they had to step up to make sure that Sarah was getting the proper care. They learned to live in the moment and not to wish things were different. They also never blamed each other for Sarah’s problems. To accept that this was the hand their child was dealt and this is the life she was given. This gave them a sense of calm about things and no regrets about “what if’s”. Stuart discusses how you need to separate the child from the illness and teach them that their condition is just something they’ll have to deal with and get on with life. No sense in wishing it were otherwise.

Stuart discussed how celebrations of all the firsts in life  are exponentially more joyful because they are so meaningful because Sarah’s mom and Dad never thought they’d ever get to have those firsts with their child.

Click here to read the full shownotes

Thank you for joining us and welcome to Episode 87 of the Couples Expert Podcast!

In this week’s episode Stuart talks about having healthy relationships during Thanksgiving; How we can learn to be appreciative and thankful for those people that make our life richer and more full. Especially our life partners. These are the people that are always there for us in so many ways. We are very grateful for the love in our lives and we can make this Thanksgiving holiday the best we’ve ever had with our partners.

Stuart reminds us of the paradox of thankfulness; of how when you begin to appreciate the good things in your life, you are able to find more to be thankful for.  If we get into a habit of looking for those things to be grateful for, it really becomes an “attitude of gratitude” which makes life better.

Stuart discusses how the travel and obligations of the holidays can cause anxiety and stress but whether you’re cooking for a crowd, stuck at the airport or having a quiet intimate get together with immediate family, it all depends on how you see it. If you spend quality time focused on your relationship with your partner, you can have a great time connecting together. Make a commitment to each other and determine to make the holiday about connecting with each other and your children. Avoid letting the little things getting you down, make it special and meaningful and make some great memories.

To read the complete show notes click here

In Episode 86 of the Couples Expert Podcast Stuart is discussing how to help couples to take their relationship from “good” , to fun and exciting. There are ways to keep your relationship feeling brand new no matter how long you’ve been together as a couple.

Couples that have been together for a long time can get into predictable routines. While that’s not always a bad thing, (our routines keeps us comfortable and secure), when life becomes too predictable you can find yourselves in a rut. Stuart is going to give you some ideas for keeping your relationship new and fun and injecting some spontaneity into your life.

“Couples that laugh together , Last together” Dr. John Gottman

Laughter and Play

Stuart talks about how laughter and play can help to strengthen your relationship and finding our sense of humor helps us to get through even the toughest times. If you can learn to lighten up, you’ll have a more joyful outlook on everything in life. Stuart advises couples not to take themselves too seriously, to laugh and love together and have fun.