The Dad I Want To Be with Mike Forrester

How long do you think it would take a realtor to go from selling two houses per year to selling 9 houses in just a couple of months? For John Schuchman, that transformation happened in a two-year timeframe. During this same time, 80% of the realtors are now out of business.

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You might think that John had special help or insider help, but that's not at all the case. John came close to having his house foreclosed. Join us to hear how John found success in real estate and came to know his gifting despite friends and family doubting his ability.

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Connect with John Schuchman

Website:

https://therealestatesurvivalguide.com/

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Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/TheRealEstateSurvivalGuide

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Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/thelancasterrealtor/

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Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

Winning medals and hitting big goals can leave a man feeling empty when the goal never changed who he is. My guest Alain Dumonceaux grew up poor as the oldest in his family. His dad had to work all the time. As a young cook, he found older chefs who became part big brother and part father figure. He went on to win two silver medals at the Culinary Olympics in Frankfurt. The confidence lasted about two years, and then he was still stuck with himself. His first marriage to his high school sweetheart fell apart in his 30s. He spent more than two years in deep depression, barely saw his kids, and declared bankruptcy. He says he lost his family and lost himself. Years later, the death of his father-in-law, his closest friend, opened that void again. Unprocessed grief nearly cost him his current marriage. He found nowhere for men to go, so he built The Awakened Man.

What changed was how Alain used what he learned. For about 20 years he read every self-help book he could find without applying much of it. Now he takes at least one strategy from every book or course and puts it into his day. His mornings include meditation, exercise, and setting an intention, a habit he picked up from Robin Sharma. He sets goals by finishing one sentence first. Upon achieving this goal, I am the kind of man who does what? When a negative story about himself shows up, he asks why, again and again, until he reaches the belief underneath. Then he asks whether that belief is true. He says it almost never is, or it's a grain of truth turned into a mountain. He also keeps several mentors, each for a different part of his life.

The biggest change showed up in his marriage. After his divorce, Alain became what he calls the doormat with his wife Kimmy. He was afraid that pushing back would leave him alone and losing everything again. He learned it's okay to speak up and still stay present and hold space for her. Their conversations moved from seeking approval to seeking collaboration. At 57, he says he feels more alive than he did in his 30s because his work has purpose. He now looks at his medals with reverence, and they no longer have to prove his worth. Mike Forrester teaches that a man needs to know who he is with no titles at all. Alain learned that lesson after the medals stopped carrying him. For the dad chasing the next win to feel like enough, Alain offers a better question to ask.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Use the sentence "upon achieving this goal, I am the kind of man who..." to set goals that actually change you.
• Recognize why career wins and awards can lift your confidence for a while and then leave you empty.
• Learn how to question a negative story about yourself by asking why until you reach the belief underneath.
• Pull one strategy from every book or course you take and put it into your daily routine.
• See how speaking up with your wife, instead of staying the doormat, turns approval seeking into partnership.
• Spot how unprocessed grief and an old divorce can quietly put your current marriage at risk.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:03:09 - how depression, divorce, and bankruptcy cost him everything

00:09:39 - how to actually apply what you read in self-help books

00:13:07 - why purpose makes life feel fuller as you get older

00:14:52 - finding a mentor who believes in you

00:19:42 - why reaching your goals can still leave you empty

00:23:37 - finding father figures when your dad was always working

00:26:57 - why achievements don't fix low self-worth

00:30:52 - how to quiet the voice that says you're not good enough

00:35:23 - how to break limiting beliefs and talk with your wife about what you need

00:38:30 - using the five whys to challenge the story you tell yourself

00:41:33 - why the pain of regret outlasts the pain of change

00:43:47 - why every man needs more than one mentor

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Connect with Alain Dumonceaux

Website:

https://www.theawakenedman.net/

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Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/theawakenedman.net/

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Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/theawakenedman2020/

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Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

Have you ever had a dream that felt out of reach or that you "couldn't get there from here?" Vincent Pugliese talks about how he and his wife focused on building a bridge to their dream of freedom through patience and persistence. You might think it was easy, but ask them about the 'year of work' as they coined it.

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Just like you and me, they were raising a family, working and then also working on their plan. Of course, their family and friends were supportive and knew they could do it, right? Well, it'd be great if that were the case, but that wasn't the case. Join us to hear what Vincent's family thought and the hurdles they had to overcome to reach their dream of living a life of freedom.

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Connect with Vincent Pugliese

Website:

https://totallifefreedom.com

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Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/totallifefreedom1/

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Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

Like many of us, we've longed to play professional sports, and for Zac Hoffman, his dream was to be an NFL quarterback. However, he faced many hurdles on the path to his goal and realized that his plan was out of his reach. With this realization, he went through an identity crisis. What was he going to do now? He made the brave choice to ask a coach for help.

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From the personal work Zac began to do, he then discovered his purpose was to have an impact on people. So he moved into coaching for international teams and started investing in his players' lives. Zac is now focused on helping guide players who are either retiring or missed accomplishing their own professional sports dream. Join us as Zac shares how you can find your identity and purpose in life.

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Connect with Zac Hoffman

Websites:

https://swaleadership.onuniverse.com/

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Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/zachoff12/

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Facebook:

https://m.facebook.com/swaleadership/

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Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

Can you imagine going from being a broke handyman to creating the bestselling fitness program in America? That was the exact trajectory Tony Horton experienced with his P90X program. However, long before he became a famed Beachbody instructor, Tony had to navigate a childhood marked by frequent moves, a severe speech impediment, and the challenges of an unstable home life.

In this episode, Tony pulls back the curtain on the mindset shifts that changed his life, the principles he outlined in his book The Big Picture, and the harsh realities of facing Ramsay Hunt syndrome. A condition that left him entirely incapacitated—unable to eat, drink, or even get out of bed—Tony shares the holistic recovery approach he used to bounce back. Now 64 years old, Tony discusses his current ventures with Tonal, his new "Power of 4" philosophy, and how he continues to live an extraordinary, fearless life.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• How a conversation with his uncle about "reinventing himself" completely shifted his approach to college and life.

• The reality of navigating childhood trauma, speech impediments, and bullying before finding success.

• Why consistency is vastly more important than intensity when trying to hit long-term goals.

• The "Power of 4" framework Tony uses to balance exercise, nutrition, supplementation, and mindfulness.

• The specific lifestyle changes—including a plant-based diet and strict sleep hygiene—that keep Tony thriving in his sixties.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:02:15 - Leaving Beachbody and Building a Future with Tonal

00:06:40 - The Development of "The Power of 4" Philosophy

00:11:20 - Balancing Business Hustle with Personal Rest and Recovery

00:16:30 - Breaking Down the "Do Your Best, Forget the Rest" Mindset

00:21:45 - Why Consistency Trumps Intensity Every Time

00:27:10 - Overcoming a Childhood Speech Impediment and Bullying

00:32:15 - Navigating Family Dysfunction and Financial Stress

00:36:50 - The Advice That Helped Tony Reinvent Himself in College

00:41:20 - Surviving and Recovering from Ramsay Hunt Syndrome

Connect with Tony Horton

Websites:

https://powernationfitness.org/

https://www.tonyhortonlife.com/

Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/tonyshorton/

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/TonySHorton/

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Every decision a man makes comes from love or fear, and that choice shapes his work, his marriage, and his kids. My guest David Henzel is a serial entrepreneur who learned that lesson the long way. He went to fourteen different schools and never fit in. By twelve, he was already smoking and drinking. He dropped out of school at fifteen, lost and unsure what to do with his life. Then a friend asked him to start a computer business, and he found his path. He later moved to the United States and co-founded MaxCDN. Along the way, he was a painfully shy introvert who also worked far too much. His family life suffered because work always came first.

David walks Mike Forrester through the tools that changed him. He beat his shyness by going to Toastmasters twice a week and two networking events a week. The real switch came when his yoga teacher said every decision is made out of love or out of fear. He used to do chores for his wife out of fear of conflict. The result was a poor job and another fight. Now he reminds himself he’s doing it because he wants to make her happy. He and his wife also wrote down what they expect of each other at home, just like roles at work. He says that took away most of the friction they’d ever had. He tracks three keystone habits: sweating every day, planning the next day, and doing the task he’d usually put off first. Inbox zero is his warning sign. When he misses it for days, he knows he’s overloaded and needs to cut back.

The turn came during a brutal stretch of life. His daughter was born, and two weeks later his mother died. His wife needed two surgeries, his grandmother passed, and then his wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. She’s doing fine today. A daily gratitude practice and a habit of accepting what he couldn’t change carried him through. The diagnosis also made him ask whether his work had the impact he wanted. Today he puts time with his wife and daughter in his habit tracker and plans family trips months ahead. He lets people book calls only through his calendar link so he can’t give away family time. Mike shares that he found out he has dyslexia at forty. He also says the book Boundaries gave him permission to say no to his mom. This one is for the dad with kids still at home whose work keeps crowding out his family. He wants a simple system that protects time with his wife and kids.

What You’ll Learn In This Episode:

• Use the love or fear filter to change how you approach work, sales, and chores at home.
• Learn how writing down roles and expectations with your wife can cut the fights over who does what.
• Recognize the warning signs that you’re overloaded before your health and family start to slip.
• Walk through three keystone habits: sweating every day, planning tomorrow, and doing the hardest task first.
• See how a daily gratitude practice can carry you through illness and loss in your family.
• Spot the ways work steals your family time, and use your calendar and habit tracker to protect it.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:04:00 - Why he dropped out of school at 15 and how he found his path

00:07:00 - How to overcome shyness as an introvert

00:09:00 - How to make decisions out of love instead of fear

00:10:00 - How to help your wife around the house without resentment

00:13:00 - What to do when your wife asks for something you don’t want to do

00:20:00 - How he handles hard emotions with logic

00:26:00 - How hard seasons can refine you instead of burn you down

00:28:00 - How gratitude helps you get through the hardest seasons

00:31:00 - How his wife’s breast cancer changed what he wanted from work

00:33:00 - How setting roles at home cut the fights with his wife

00:38:00 - Keystone habits that keep a busy man at his best

00:40:00 - How a workaholic dad protects time for his family

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Connect with David Henzel

Website:

https://henzel.com/

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Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/davidhenzel/

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LinkedIn:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidhenzel/

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Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

Yep, you guessed it; we're halfway through 2022. Most guys will have made New Year's resolutions with the best intentions, only to stop the actions needed to reach their goals quickly. The great news is we are only midway through 2022, so there is still time to set goals, take action and make progress. It's your life, which means It's up to you to create a better life. So what will you decide to do with the remaining six months of 2022? To work on bringing about the life you've been dreaming of or continuing on the path where every day feels like you're Bill Murray stuck in a repeating loop from the movie Groundhog Day?

Recovering from porn addiction starts when a successful man ends the double life he’s been hiding from his wife. My guest Ian Koniak was a number one sales producer at Salesforce. At home, he was drifting further from his wife and kids. For most of his adult life, he got his sense of worth from the attention of women. He kept strip clubs, porn, and drinking hidden from his wife. In February 2020, he started coming clean. His wife was four months pregnant, and she collapsed with stress contractions. On the drive to the hospital, Ian thought they were going to lose their son. The doctor found a heartbeat, and Ian knew his health and his family had to come first. When he later told her everything, she left for about a week. She came back and gave him a chance. Today he runs his own coaching business and has been free of the old patterns for more than two years.

His recovery started with 90 meetings in 90 days. Ian joined SAA, found a sponsor, and went to therapy every week. His therapist helped him trace his patterns back to age 12. That year his family went from four people to two, and porn became the way he coped. In this conversation with Mike Forrester, Ian names his real triggers. Stress, exhaustion, overwhelm, and putting off hard work all pushed him to numb out. He explains the difference between physical and process addictions. He uses Charles Duhigg’s book The Power of Habit to spot his cues. Then he changed his environment to take the pressure off his willpower. He installed computer filters that alert his wife and flushed his Adderall. When he traveled, he handed her his cards. A daily morning routine and an affirmation beside a photo of his family keep him steady. He blocks lunch with his wife every day and stops working by six. He says those boundaries forced him to work smarter, and the business grew anyway.

The heart of this episode is grace. For years, Ian beat himself up and asked what was wrong with him. Once he saw where his patterns started, he could see that a lot of it wasn’t his fault. He still owned every bit of the repair. He told his wife everything and even took a polygraph so she’d know nothing was left hidden. Mike Forrester teaches that “it’s not your fault, but it is your responsibility,” and Ian’s turn lands right there. Ian says he carries sadness now for how he hurt his wife, but he carries no shame. He also went to a men’s retreat to work on his temper. He came home with a mantra about fighting for his family instead of with them. This one is for the dad with kids still at home who looks successful and is hiding something. He wants his kids to grow up with a father who has nothing to hide.

What You’ll Learn In This Episode:

• Recognize the stress, exhaustion, and overwhelm that push you to numb out, and plan a healthy reset like a walk.
• Understand how firm work boundaries, like lunch with your wife and a set stop time, can make you more productive.
• See why providing for your family means your time and presence, along with the paycheck.
• Use your environment, like filters, removing substances, and accountability with your wife, so you rely less on willpower.
• Trace your habits back to the home you grew up in so you can give yourself grace and still own the change.
• Learn how fighting for your family, not with them, helps you get your temper under control with your kids.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:03:00 - How to set work boundaries so your family gets your best time

00:06:00 - Living a double life and keeping secrets from your wife

00:10:00 - The hospital moment that became his rock bottom

00:11:00 - Getting help for compulsive sexual behavior and addiction

00:15:00 - Why 90 meetings in 90 days helps rewire your brain

00:16:00 - Tracing addictive habits back to a hard year at age 12

00:19:00 - How to spot the stress and overwhelm that trigger acting out

00:26:00 - Why men numb out with screens to escape hard feelings

00:29:00 - How to change your environment instead of relying on willpower

00:35:00 - How to control your temper and fight for your family

00:40:00 - How to give yourself grace after hurting your family

00:46:00 - Three keys to fulfillment: contribution, growth, and connection

Men who grew up without a father often become the one who takes care of everyone, and they turn bitter when nobody gives back. My guest Dr. Kendrick Bailey knows that pattern from the inside. His mom raised him and his twin brother on her own. He took on the father role for everybody around him. He gave people what he wished someone would give him, and he expected it to come back without asking. When it didn’t, frustration set in. He joined the military at seventeen and gave it most of his adult life. In combat, after his unit lost someone, he sat in a room full of men who were crying. It was okay to cry, and he couldn’t. Today he’s a therapist and an author who mentors young professionals. His focus now is his wife, his kids, and his own wellness.

Kendrick walks Mike Forrester through the tools that turned it around. He starts with balance between giving and receiving. A man stuck as the giver slides into bitterness, and a man stuck as the receiver slides into entitlement. He says you have to ask for what you need, because people won’t read your mind. At work, he leads as a servant leader. He hands people real responsibility and steps into their shoes to see their side. At home, he leaves the officer and the therapist at the door. When his strong-willed daughters frustrated him, he looked closer and saw the same qualities in himself. He calls that the mirror. He also describes most relationships as a tug of war, where we spend more time trying to convince people than understand them. His answer is to let go of the rope. He chooses ownership over blame, and he says forgiveness doesn’t have to wait for an apology.

The turn came in his late thirties under toxic leadership in the military. The more he gave, the more he was accused of wanting to run the show. He realized he had nothing to prove to anybody but himself. He passed on the promotion, put the man under him in charge, and moved to a new role. Letting go of the bitterness took twelve to eighteen months. His wife helped when she reminded him that he chose to stay. Mike admits he used to ask the same question Kendrick did about why nobody was giving back. Kendrick’s shift from blame to ownership echoes what Mike Forrester lives and teaches. It’s not your fault, but it is your responsibility. Kendrick says growing up without a father shaped his struggle with identity more than anything else. This one is for the dad with kids still at home who gives until he’s empty and quietly resents it. He wants to stop the power struggle at home and give his kids a father who can receive as well as give.

What You’ll Learn In This Episode:

• Recognize how giving without receiving leads to bitterness, and why you have to ask for what you need.
• Spot the father role you took on as a boy and how it still drives your people pleasing at work.
• Use the mirror to see what frustrates you in your kids as a reflection of yourself.
• Learn how to drop the tug of war in your marriage by working to understand instead of convince.
• Understand why ownership beats blame and how to forgive someone who never apologized.
• See when it’s time to step away from a role instead of grinding harder to prove yourself.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:03:00 - Why men who give too much end up bitter and resentful

00:05:00 - Why the man who takes care of everyone struggles to ask for help

00:07:00 - Choosing your wife and kids after years of work coming first

00:09:00 - Why some men can’t cry even when it’s okay to

00:11:00 - How to stop bringing your work role home to your family

00:12:00 - How to end power struggles in your marriage

00:14:00 - How to take ownership instead of blaming others

00:20:00 - How to take off the mask and stop trying to prove yourself

00:24:00 - How the father wound drives people pleasing at work

00:29:00 - How long it takes to let go of bitterness and forgive

00:31:00 - How to forgive a parent who never apologized

00:37:00 - How growing up without a father shapes your identity

Connect with Dr. Terrance Z. Johnson

Website:

https://iprogress.cc/

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Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/iprogresscc

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Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike

This week I am joined by Dr. Terrance Z. Johnson, who shares his personal growth journey and how it changed the world around him. He shares about extending an olive branch to his father and telling his dad how past actions left him feeling. This forgiveness led to time together before his dad’s unexpected passing away. Terrance speaks to how community has made a big difference for him along the way.

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Connect with Dr. Terrance Z. Johnson

Website:

https://iprogress.cc/

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Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/iprogresscc

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Connect with Mike Forrester

https://linktr.ee/hicoachmike