The Dad I Want To Be With Mike Forrester

A man can be externally successful and internally unfulfilled for years until a wake-up call forces him to look at his life. My guest Alan Lazaros lost his father in a car accident when he was two. By 14, he had also lost his stepdad to divorce. By 26, he was an engineer making great money, investing, and paying off his college debt. He was also drinking, partying, and escaping into video games. On a dark winter night, he missed a buried yield sign and drove into the path of a lifted pickup truck. Everyone walked away. Then he looked at his smashed car and thought of the pictures of his father’s car. His dad died in a car accident at 28. Alan saw the crash as the second chance his father never got. He also learned that becoming a better man made some people like him less. To people who aren’t doing the work, a man who changes becomes a mirror.

Alan’s first try at change swung too far. He went all in on self-improvement, went broke, and had to sell off his assets. He learned that fulfilling work needs passion, purpose, and profit together. He says IQ came easy for him, and emotional intelligence was the hard part. Now he coaches business owners and helps them see that growing a business means growing themselves. In this conversation with Mike Forrester, he walks through his year-end review. Ask what to keep, what to improve, and what to get rid of. If you struggle with self-doubt, spend 80 percent of the review on your wins. If you don’t, spend 80 percent on what to do better. Then write three lessons each about yourself, other people, and the world. His rules for momentum are simple. Stop the wrong trains, start the right ones, improve them, and keep moving. For Alan, alcohol was a wrong train that had to stop.

The emotional heart of this episode is a funeral. At his uncle Joe’s service, in the same church as his father’s funeral, Alan stopped trying to keep it together. He wept in the church and again at his father’s grave. Therapy, breath work, and years of revisiting his story had prepared him for that moment. Now he says he doesn’t have to keep it together because he simply is together. Alan says it wasn’t his fault his dad died or his stepdad left. It’s still his responsibility to build a life from it. That’s the same line Mike Forrester lives and teaches. Alan also tells about three boys at a pull-up bar who couldn’t celebrate each other. It showed him how early boys learn to hide weakness. This one is for the dad with kids still at home who looks successful and keeps everything locked inside. He wants his sons to see a strong man who can still cry.

What You’ll Learn In This Episode:

• Recognize when you’re successful at work but unfulfilled inside and at home.
• Use three simple questions, keep, improve, and get rid of, to review your year honestly.
• Learn how to split your review between wins and improvements based on whether you struggle with self-doubt.
• Write three lessons each about yourself, other people, and the world before you set new goals.
• See why letting yourself grieve openly makes you more whole, and what that shows your kids.
• Spot the wrong trains in your life, like drinking, and stop them before you build momentum.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:03:32 - The car accident at 26 that became his wake-up call

00:07:33 - Seeing his wrecked car and getting the second chance his dad never had

00:09:47 - Feeding the good wolf and the bad wolf at the same time

00:11:47 - Why some people like you less when you start to improve

00:15:44 - How to find work that combines passion, purpose, and profit

00:19:09 - Why IQ comes easy and emotional intelligence is hard

00:25:45 - How to review your year by deciding what to keep, improve, and cut

00:29:25 - Three lessons about yourself, other people, and the world

00:37:47 - Why he stopped trying to keep it together at a family funeral

00:41:52 - How therapy and breath work helped him become whole

00:46:36 - What young boys learn about hiding weakness

00:56:14 - His rules for stopping the wrong trains and staying on track

Connect with Alan Lazaros

Website

https://www.nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc

Instagram

http://www.instagram.com/alazaros88

Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/alan.lazaros

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Have you ever felt like you're too much or not enough? I sit down with Alan Lazaros, CEO of Next Level University, to explore the journey of self-acceptance and personal growth. Alan's story is one of resilience and transformation. From losing his father at age two to navigating a tumultuous childhood, he shares how adversity shaped his drive for success and work ethic. But success came at a cost - the fear of being seen for who he truly is.

Alan's insights challenge us to look inward, become self-aware and become comfortable with all aspects of ourselves - the good, the bad, and the extraordinary. His message is clear: true fulfillment comes from owning who you are and improving from a place of self-acceptance. If you struggle with self-doubt, impostor syndrome or the fear of standing out, then listen to what Alan shares in this episode and decide that it's time to step into your authentic power and create the life you truly desire.

The Power of Owning Your Uniqueness

• Why do some people fear being "too much" while others fear being "not enough"
• How to work from your strengths without dimming your light
• The importance of authenticity in personal and professional relationships

Overcoming Childhood Traumas

• How early experiences shape our beliefs and behaviors
• The impact of abandonment on future relationships
• Turning pain into motivation for success

The key moments in this episode are:

00:07:38 - Self-Concept and Understanding Others

00:11:09 - Personality Tests and Divergent Thinking

00:13:19 - Exploring Personality Assessments

00:21:19 - Overcoming childhood challenges

00:23:28 - Impact of family trauma

00:29:10 - How Drive Can Come from Pain

00:33:21 - Struggles with Competence and Belonging

00:41:04 - Embracing Uniqueness and Self-acceptance

Connect with Alan Lazaros

Website

https://www.nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc

Instagram

http://www.instagram.com/alazaros88

Facebook

http://www.facebook.com/alan.lazaros

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Building confidence isn’t about sudden leaps - it’s a marathon of consistent growth. Sha Sparks emphasized the power of reframing our inner thoughts, shifting limiting beliefs to empowering affirmations. By using simple "I am" statements like "I am confident" and "I am compassionate," you can train your brain to internalize and embrace these traits. Journaling plays a pivotal role in this journey, providing a space to reflect on progress and identify thought patterns that slow down growth. As Sha points out, fear often masquerades as imposter syndrome, stemming from past experiences and overcoming it requires compassion, self-awareness and intentional effort.

Challenging fear and self-doubt starts with determining and evaluating the labels or titles society and past experiences have placed on you. As Sha discusses, reviewing a journal offers insights into the obstacles you've overcome, even uncovering patterns engrained by childhood experiences. Words have immense power - focusing on uplifting affirmations instead of critical beliefs can redirect your mindset and actions. We talked about actionable tips for transformation, like giving yourself permission to acknowledge your accomplishments and trusting your ability to navigate setbacks. Whether transitioning from self-doubt or seeking a renewed sense of purpose, the insights Sha revealed are fuel priming the engine for those men ready to embrace their authentic selves with confidence and clarity.

In this episode, you will be able to:

· Conquer your fears and live boldly with Fearless Living techniques.

· Harness the transformative power of "I Am" affirmations to shape your self-identity.

· Uncover your personal purpose and create a compelling vision for your life.

· Explore the profound impact of childhood experiences on your adult identity.

· Cultivate self-confidence through the strength of vulnerability.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:05:54 - Defining Personal Leadership

00:11:23 - Grace and Self-Compassion

00:13:46 - The Power of Mindset and Affirmations

00:19:39 - The Influence of Language and Inner Voice

00:23:54 - Embracing Confidence and Acknowledging Progress

00:24:50 - Overcoming Fear and Embracing Vulnerability

00:32:06 - Self-Sabotage and False Beliefs

00:40:17 - Borrowing Confidence

Connect with Shā Sparks

Website

https://www.shasparks.com/

LinkedIn

www.linkedin.com/in/sha-sparks

Instagram

www.instagram.com/theshasparks/

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/theshasparks/

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Within a couple of weeks, Eli Libby lost his marriage, nearly lost his business, and lost the uncle who guided him. He found out his wife had been cheating, and the marriage ended in divorce. His business had boomed during COVID and then crumbled faster than he and his partner, Kyle Nelson, could see. They had to lay off 12 people in one day, right before payroll, and took no pay themselves. The next day, Eli learned that his uncle, a military veteran and his guiding light, had died. He had two paths in front of him. He could sink, or he could turn it into part of his story. Eli chose the second. He reminded himself that someone out there was facing something worse. He pictured each hard season as a chapter in a book he was writing. He leaned hard on 17 close friends, a group he had convinced to follow him to Central Oregon.

Eli now blocks off every Friday for himself. He snowboards, rock climbs, or mountain bikes, anything that puts him in a flow state. He tells Mike Forrester that when you show up for yourself, you show up better for everyone else. Eli says entrepreneurs go into business for the freedom of time, then work 100 hours a week anyway. When a man feels guilty about taking time for himself, Eli asks a question. What happens in one, three, and five years if he never does? He also asks what that man's kids learn from watching him run on burgers and soda. It starts with giving yourself permission, like blocking off one morning a week. Two mornings a week, Eli joins F3, a free, peer led men's workout that ends in a circle of trust. Mike shares how he now runs with his oldest daughter, who pushes him harder than anyone.

Eli credits curiosity for pulling him through. He believes every adult was curious as a child, and solitude can bring it back. The Gap and the Gain helped him measure how far he had come instead of how far he had left. He learned what to look for in a partner and has since married the love of his life. Today he and Kyle run solo retreats for people starting new chapters. Eli refuses to let his divorce define him. Mike teaches that who you are is separate from the roles you fill and the things that happen to you. Eli lives that out by treating his hardest season as a chapter of his story. If you're a dad who feels guilty taking a morning for yourself, ask what your kids learn watching you never stop. Put one block on your calendar and keep it.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Recognize why guilt about taking time for yourself keeps you running on empty at work and at home.
• Use Eli's one, three, and five year question to see what skipping self-care costs you, your wife, and your kids.
• Understand how flow state activities like snowboarding or climbing clear your head and make you more creative.
• See how leaning on a tight community can carry you through divorce, job loss, and grief.
• Learn the gap and gain mindset for measuring how far you've come instead of how far you have left.
• Walk through how to keep a hard season from becoming your identity.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:01:38 - how a free men's workout group builds camaraderie

00:09:18 - how to balance your health, family, and community

00:10:42 - why taking time away makes you better at work

00:15:23 - how to stop feeling guilty about taking time for yourself

00:18:17 - how self worth ties to your identity

00:20:40 - when divorce, layoffs, and loss hit in the same two weeks

00:22:56 - what it's like to lay off 12 people in one day

00:25:56 - how the gap and gain mindset helps you move forward

00:28:04 - why community got him through his darkest season

00:30:43 - how to find your curiosity again as an adult

00:35:06 - why your core values can change as you grow

00:39:43 - how to keep a hard season from defining who you are

Connect with Eli Libby

Website

https://www.peakfulfillment.co/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/elilibby/

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Harvey Laguerre shares his journey of overcoming tough times. He talks about his childhood, where he faced a lot of struggles between his parents and how these challenges affected him as an adult. Harvey emphasizes the importance of being honest and open about our feelings as men. He also talked about his joy in raising his kids and why it's important to show them love, support and discussing our mistakes.

Being a stay-at-home dad, Harvey faces various societal expectations and challenges, but he takes pride in caring for his children. He believes it's crucial for dads to be involved and present in their children's lives. Harvey makes it clear that men need to talk about their problems instead of keeping them inside. He reminds us that every man has value and can make a difference. His story teaches us to be strong, open, and supportive, helping each other through life's ups and downs.

In this episode, you will be able to:

· Understand how parental relationships impact your adult life and relationships.

· Discover effective strategies for overcoming the unique challenges faced by stay-at-home dads.

· Learn to navigate and overcome mental health struggles commonly experienced by men.

· Explore the role of personal development in enhancing fatherhood and family relationships.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:11:12 - Challenges of Being a Stay-at-Home Dad

00:15:26 - Nurturing Loving Relationships with Our Children

00:19:28 - Embracing Imperfection and Strength

00:21:32 - Becoming the Father He Didn't Have

00:26:00 - Struggles with Confidence and Self-Worth

00:29:29 - The Importance of Communication and Self-Reflection

00:38:55 - The Desperation of Men

00:41:39 - The Value of Every Man

Connect with Harvey Laguerre

Website

www.Harveylaguerre.com

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/harveylaguerre/

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/menaretheprizepod

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/ThePrizeIsMen

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Michael Rosenberg says you haven't counted the cost when you remain where you are in life, instead of discovering what's truly available to you and finding your purpose. When you're trapped in a cycle of burnout and dissatisfaction, the demands of the corporate world can often become a relentless grind. Michael talks about the importance of stepping out of your comfort zone to discover your true purpose and alignment. His story is an example of what's possible when you break free from the golden handcuffs and redefine success on your terms. He spent over a decade feeling unfulfilled in sales roles, pushing through burnout after burnout, until he decided to take a leap of faith. His decision to sell everything and travel the world taught him crucial lessons about faith, purpose and the power within us all to create and live a life of meaning.

For many men, the fear of the unknown can be paralyzing, but Michael's journey highlights why facing that fear head-on is foundational for personal growth. His journey shows that true freedom comes from within, it's less about chasing external success and more about aligning with your inner values and passions. By redefining his purpose and embracing the uncertainty, Michael discovered transformational speaking and coaching as his calling. Michael reveals common misconceptions for men, such as needing to make it on your own and the belief that passion doesn’t pay the bills; changing these beliefs opens the door to a more fulfilling, intentional and balanced life.

In this episode, you will be able to:

· Embrace your fears and discover your true purpose in life.

· Navigate the transition from corporate life to entrepreneurial success.

· Unlock the power of spiritual awakening for personal growth and fulfillment.

· Uncover effective strategies to find and live your life's purpose.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:14:32 - Overcoming Setbacks and Reigniting Passion

00:19:47 - Making the Leap From Corporate

00:25:16 - Overcoming Fear with Faith

00:28:38 - Embracing Fear and Seeking Adventure

00:31:35 - The Journey to Finding Purpose

00:39:25 - Overcoming Limiting Beliefs

00:43:18 - Embracing the Unknown

Connect with Michael Rosenberg

Website

www.wakeupwithmike.com

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/wakeupwithmike/

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/wakeupwithmike

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Kyle Smith shares his journey from living with a victim mentality to becoming resilient and focused on his personal growth. He reveals the internal struggles he faced, including habitual unfaithfulness and not keeping his word to others or even himself, which negatively impacted his relationships. Kyle talks about redefining failure, turning it into a "Faithful Attempt In Learning". By consciously choosing to view his setbacks as learning opportunities, Kyle found a way to reduce the hesitation and fear that came with pursuing new opportunities.

Kyle's story didn't stop at mental reframing - he included both physical and emotional wellness into his routine, highlighting the habit of walking with deep thinking. He explains that much of his hardest work happens during these mindful walks, where he organizes his thoughts and decreases resistance to achieve clarity. Today, as a clarity consultant, Kyle uses his experiences to guide others along their paths of personal and professional growth. He emphasizes the power of choosing your mindset and surrounding yourself with supportive frameworks for lasting change. Kyle highlights how shifting your perspective on failure can open the door to both personal and collective healing.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Embrace personal empowerment by overcoming victim mentality and taking control of your life.
• Discover effective tools for personal growth and mental well-being, leading to a more fulfilling life.
• Understand the importance of setting and maintaining personal boundaries in relationships for a healthier and happier life.
• Uncover the keys to finding purpose and redefining failure, unlocking your potential for success and fulfillment.
• Learn powerful techniques for healing past trauma and anxiety, paving the way for a more peaceful and balanced life.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:08:27 - Choosing change and seeking help

00:15:43 - Overcoming the Victim Mindset

00:21:24 - Redefining Failure

00:25:47 - Defining True Purpose

00:28:40 - Self-Talk and Identity

00:29:42 - The Power of Personal Storytelling

00:32:11 - Forgiveness and Self-Compassion

00:37:09 - Writing a Letter to the Inner Child

Connect with Kyle Smith

Website

clarityconsulant.ca

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/clarity-consultant/

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/dapperdudekyle/

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/kylesmithtrainer

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Do you find yourself thinking, "when things go my way, then I'll be happy"? Andrew Matthews revealed that quite the opposite is true - unhappy people are focused on what they don't have, while happy people are focused on what they do have. instead, we should be grateful for the things we do have, after all as Andrew shares, happiness is a decision. You may think that it's all good when life is going well, but what about when I lose my job, can't pay my bills or am experiencing issues with relationships? Andrew spoke about how, yes, even in challenging times, we can choose to be happy.

Andrew didn't stop there in talking about how our lives can be drastically changed. He also spoke on how acceptance is not about agreeing with what has happened or condoning it, but rather acknowledging the reality of the situation. By doing so, we empower ourselves to move forward. Andrew showed that once acceptance is achieved, it’s crucial to live life one day at a time. By focusing on the present, we reduce the overwhelm from our past experiences. After acceptance and focusing on the present moment, Andrew recommends that the next step is to imagine a better life. He shares that positive change first begins in your imagination of what's available to you.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Discover the secrets to lasting happiness in daily life.
• Embrace life's challenges and learn why they're crucial for personal growth.
• Uncover the life-changing benefits of practicing gratitude every day.
• Unlock strategies to find happiness and fulfillment in your work life.
• Explore the transformative role of forgiveness in personal happiness.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:06:34 – Moving Forward Despite Rejections

00:17:59 - Overcoming Self-Hatred and Finding Compassion

00:19:12 - Evaluating Mistakes and Acceptance

00:23:17 - Choosing Happiness in Adversity

00:32:25 - Finding Happiness in Unfulfilling Work

00:36:58 - The Choice of Happiness

00:40:53 - Happiness as a Foundation

00:43:14 - The Importance of Self-compassion

Connect with Andrew Matthews

Website

https://andrewmatthews.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrew-matthews-5629a2/

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/andrewmatthews.author/

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/AndrewMatthewsAuthor/

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

Being the strong one for everyone else can quietly cost a man his grief, his identity, and nearly his life, and that's exactly what happened to Kyle Nelson. By late 2018 he felt like he'd finally arrived. A photography studio on Main Street in Paradise, California, a young family, a house in the Sierra Nevada foothills, a town where everyone knew his name. Then, in a matter of just hours, it was all completely gone. One day after he and his wife lost a pregnancy, the Camp Fire burned Paradise to the ground and took everything with it...their home, his business, his parents' house, the whole community. Kyle got his family out, but afterward there was no room left to grieve. Somebody had to be the strong one, the backbone for five people, so he put on what he calls his positive dad mask and kept moving. For years, that's all he was, someone surviving day to day.

In this conversation, host Mike Forrester digs in with Kyle about what it actually costs a man to be the one everybody leans on, and yet nobody checks on. Kyle's honest about going numb, about the slow slide into severe anxiety and depression, and about every well-meaning person who told him "it could be worse" when all he wanted was for someone to say his pain was real. He talks about the April morning in 2021 when he couldn't see the next day and decided he was done, and the different choice he made instead. He told his wife and his business partner he had to get away, then drove to the coast alone with a set of hard questions for reflection. That solo trip is the turning point, and it's now the model behind the two companies he's built, Peak Fulfillment and Welldia, which walk men through the same three steps he stumbled into on his own: self-reflection, self-discovery, and vision crafting.

At the core of this interview is the decision Kyle made at the bottom. If he could fall that far, he figured, then there was no ceiling the other way, just open sky. He walked out of that trip with one word to rebuild around, empowerment, and he's held it through a second miscarriage and every hard day since, because he finally knew he could come back. If you're the man holding everyone together while quietly disappearing inside his role, the one who'd rather go under in silence than say the words "I need help," or you've caught yourself thinking you don't even know who you are anymore, this one's for you.

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Recognize how being "the strong one" quietly turns into years of suppressed grief, and how holding it together for everyone else becomes its own kind of self-abandonment
• See why "it could be worse" lands so hard on a hurting man, and why your pain doesn't have to be the worst thing that's ever happened to count
• Understand why so many men would rather go under in silence than say the words "I need help", and what it finally took Kyle to raise his hand
• See in Kyle's lowest moment the proof that if a man can go that low, there's no ceiling on how high he can climb
• Walk through the three-part solo retreat he built, self-reflection, self-discovery, and vision crafting, and why you can't rush from one day to the next
• Learn why a new identity doesn't hold on its own, and the daily discipline and vulnerability it takes to stay the man you decided to become

The key moments in this episode are:

00:01:31 - Turning a mental health breakthrough into self-guided solo retreats

00:05:38 - Losing a pregnancy and a hometown in the same 24 hours

00:07:23 - What it's like to lose everything in a wildfire

00:08:34 - Being the backbone for your family while burying your own grief

00:11:24 - When your identity shrinks down to just surviving

00:14:48 - How a man goes numb when the hope finally runs out

00:18:11 - The morning he couldn't see the next day, and chose help instead

00:21:45 - How a solo trip helped him process years of suppressed pain

00:23:06 - Rebuilding your identity around one word, empowerment

00:27:49 - How to make a new identity actually stick

00:31:39 - What happens inside a self-reflection, self-discovery, and vision retreat

Whether your anger blows up in the kitchen or burns quietly on the drive home, it's running a pattern you inherited. Take the free quiz at whatsbehindyouranger.com and see which one you're carrying.

Your kids are inheriting more than your money, right now they're inheriting your patterns. Grab the free audit at yourlegacyaudit.com to see what you're passing down to them.

Connect with Kyle Nelson

Website

www.peakfulfillment.co

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/kylenelson1/

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike

One line from his brother changed Jeremy Grater's life: decide to be the weird guy who bikes to work. For years, Jeremy saw everything through the lens of depression. Even on good days, he knew the next episode was coming. Then he hurt his knee getting out of bed. With knee replacements in his family, his physical therapist told him to ride a bike as much as possible. Jeremy complained to his brother, who told him to just own it. Jeremy bought a bike off Craigslist and started riding nine miles to work and nine miles home. The bike forced him to pay attention to right now, instead of replaying the past or dreading the future. That led him to a therapist who taught him to meditate. One change opened the next, from eating better to quitting alcohol. Today Jeremy is 70 pounds lighter. He's in the longest stretch of his life without a major depressive episode, and he credits a consistent gym routine most.

Jeremy also had to rebuild who he was. He spent 20 years in commercial radio as a talk show producer, fill-in host, and assignment editor. His doctor told him the job was killing him. Leaving it meant losing his connections and the influence that had defined him. He and his family also moved from the US to British Columbia, where they knew nobody. Jeremy tells Mike Forrester that saying your thoughts out loud helps your brain process them. Then ask who you would be if you could wake up as anyone, and act like that person. He trains for life by doing hard things on purpose, like cold plunges and heavy lifts. A bad day at work, he says, matters less after you've sat in ice water.

When life knocks you off your routine, Jeremy says to start with one thing. Go to the gym once the first week, then twice the next. Consistency means showing up wherever you can, not following a perfect schedule. Before eating out of boredom or stress, he pauses to ask why he's really at the pantry. He points out that one hour a day is about 5 percent of it, and it can change everything. His favorite picture is a gas tank. If you fill it before it hits empty, you can take your family much further. Mike admits his kids used to take the brunt of his anger when he was running on fumes. Mike teaches that who you are is separate from the roles you fill. Jeremy shows you can build a new identity on purpose. If you're a dad running on empty and snapping at your kids, pull over and fill the tank. Start with one habit you actually enjoy.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

• Recognize how depression colors the way you see your job, your family, and your future.
• Understand how one small habit, like biking to work, can open the door to bigger changes.
• Use "who would I be if I could wake up as anyone" to rebuild your identity after a career change.
• See why doing hard things on purpose, like cold plunges or lifting, builds resilience for bad days.
• Learn to get back on track after falling off your routine by starting with one thing, once a week.
• Walk through why running on empty makes you snap at your kids, and how to fill your tank first.

The key moments in this episode are:

00:04:29 - how depression shapes the way you see everything

00:06:12 - how a knee injury and a bike started his turnaround

00:09:09 - the one habit that made the biggest difference

00:15:07 - what happens to your identity when you leave your career

00:18:07 - why saying your thoughts out loud helps you move forward

00:20:17 - why doing hard things on purpose builds resilience

00:22:54 - how to get back on track after falling off your routine

00:27:40 - how to stop eating out of boredom or stress

00:30:43 - why you shouldn't wait until retirement to take care of yourself

00:33:28 - how to choose which kind of pain you live with

00:37:30 - how to build healthy daily habits one at a time

00:40:34 - why running on empty hurts you and your family

Connect with Jeremy Grater

Website

www.thefitmess.com

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeremygrater/

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/fitmessguys

Instagram

https://www.facebook.com/fitmessguys

Connect with Mike Forrester

Podcast Website

https://LivingFearlessTodayPodcast.com

Coaching Website

https://www.hicoachmike.com/

LinkedIn

https://www.linkedin.com/in/hicoachmike/

Youtube

https://www.youtube.com/@hicoachmike

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/hicoachmike

Instagram

https://www.instagram.com/hicoachmike