The Everyday Human

March: On Death

March 12

Today's reflection was inspired by another poem by Stephen Crane: "I Saw a Man Pursuing the Horizon"

There is no person more human than the man pursuing the horizon. He is forever chasing life and eternally running from death.

Others will say it is futile, and he knows this to be true. A lesser being would take those words and concede, but not the human.

Until his legs give out, he will run on and on and on. 

In what ways are you like the man pursuing the horizon?

• Reflection title: Death Runs Beside You
• Creative inspiration: Stephen Crane, "I Saw a Man Pursuing the Horizon"
• Reflection Question: In what ways am I like the man pursuing the horizon? Am I being too stubborn in my pursuit of life and escape from Death, or not stubborn enough?

March: On Death

March 11

Today's reflection was inspired by another poem by Emily Dickinson, "Because I Could not Stop for Death."

We all have our own perceptions of Death--our own beliefs of what it might look like, what our journey with it might be like.

These perceptions are shaped by certain traditions and beliefs that we've been taught about Death from a young age.

But have you slowed down to consider how you envision Death? How you might welcome it when it's time? Is this the perception and relationship you want? Should you reshape it?

• Reflection title: Close Your Eyes and Picture Death
• Creative inspiration: Emily Dickinson, "Because I Could not Stop for Death"
• Reflection Question: How do I perceive Death? What tradition shapes my view of it, and should I question this and reshape it? 

March: On Death

March 10

Today's reflection was inspired by an untitled poem by Sanober Khan.

Your life, everything in it, and this moment are fleeting. Ephemeral. 

That is part of what gives our existence its beauty. Like a tulip in the spring, they bloom and stand tall and bright for all to see, and in a few short weeks, the petals fall, but the impression they make remains.

Nothing lasts and nothing remains, this is clear. So what will you do with this knowledge?

• Reflection title: Ephemeral
• Creative inspiration: Sanober Khan, Untitled Poem
• Reflection Question: Nothing remains and nothing lasts—I know this. So, what will I do about it?
  
  

March: On Death

March 9

Today's reflection was inspired by another quote from Stephen Crane's Red Badge of Courage.

At my father's wake, as I knelt before his body, I was hit with a wave of questions: Was he there in the room watching this farce of a wake? Was he somewhere else facing judgment as we were taught would happen? Was he just gone? 

No answers came in the form of a random winter breeze despite the closed windows or goosebumps or chills or anything like the books and movies might have you think. No answers came at all. And the longer I knelt, the more I came to realize something: I couldn’t wait for him in life, and I certainly couldn’t wait for him in death. It was time to move on.

Sometimes the dead can teach us more about ourselves than they could in life, but despite having gone there themselves, they still cannot give us the answer to the Question and what’s on the other side. That’s for each of us to find out on our own, all in good time.

• Reflection title: Sometimes, There Is No Answer
• Creative inspiration: Stephen Crane, The Red Badge of Courage.
• Reflection Question: What is my belief of the answer to the Question? Has it changed, and do I believe my belief?

March: On Death

March 8

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from J.D. Salinger's Catcher in the Rye.

Despite what our culture or society or others may have you believe, there is no allotted amount of socially acceptable time to mourn someone or something or whatever it is you might be mourning. 

We all mourn in our own time. Don't rush your healing.

So if you’ve lost someone, find the support you need to be able to continue taking care of yourself and your remaining loved ones, but you don’t ever have to stop missing them when you see their favorite flower. You don’t ever have to stop thinking of them when you hear a song they loved or watch their favorite movie. 

Feel those emotions when they come back up. Sit with the ghost of them. Honor them. Because to you, they were probably a thousand times nicer than the people you know that are still alive and all—for God’s sake.

• Reflection title: Love Them Long After They’re Gone
• Creative inspiration: J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye
• Reflection Question: If I’ve lost a loved one, have I pushed down my feelings of mourning? How can I honor and sit with their memory today?

March: On Death

March 7

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet.

Watch the ocean waves crash endlessly upon the shore. Restless, stubborn in their eternal struggle against land. Admirable in their tenacity? Perhaps. But should not all things rest? Even the stars must rest when they’ve expended their energy, and so must we.

Your life is one never-ending climb to the top of a mountain. But when you reach the top of a mountain, is that the end of the hike? Or do you stop to breathe and look out at the sky above and land below? Do you descend to return to where you started? 

Know that death is not the end, but rather a continuation of the journey—in whatever shape that looks like: an afterlife, a return to matter to be transformed into something else. You’ll find out soon enough. 

In the meantime, make the most of the time you have.

• Reflection title: Just the Beginning
• Creative inspiration: Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet
• Reflection Question: Have I perceived my eventual death as something permanent, or as another transition?

March: On Death

March 6

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Henry Wadsworth Longfellow's Hyperion: A Romance.

There’s something about graveyards or old graves, places where those who have lived out their lives, however long or short, come to rest—for good.

They are peaceful, as though nature and those who have gone before us are welcoming us to join and rest with them for a while.

And whenever I visit them, I can't help but hope—if I feel welcome here among these dead strangers—perhaps, those I love who have gone before me are waiting to welcome me with a countenance of affection. 

And so now, every chance I get, I take the opportunity to walk among the foot-prints of angels.

• Reflection title: You Will Be With Them Again Soon
• Creative inspiration: Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Hyperion: A Romance.
• Reflection Question: What beliefs do I hold of the dead? Are they of affection, hostility, or indifference? When was the last time I walked among the foot-prints of angels? 

March: On Death

March 5

Today's reflection was inspired by another quote from Marcus Aurelius' Meditations.

In one season you can watch the flower of a tree become pollinated and bear fruit. The fruit will be picked by a hand or eaten by animals or remain on its branch until it withers and falls to the earth to be taken back into the soil.

Do you hear it complain? Do you hear it wish for more time?

There is much we can learn from books and conversations and others, but do not forget to heed the lessons from the greatest teacher of all--nature. 

And do not hesitate to return to nature and become more like it in how you live your life.

• Reflection title: Does the Olive Fear Falling from the Branch?
• Creative inspiration: Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
• Reflection Question: Have I been working in harmony with nature or against it? What can I do better to move toward my end without complaining?

March: On Death

March 4

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Carpe Jugulum by Terry Pratchett.

From the moment you are born . . . no, no, even before that. From the moment you are conceived, and perhaps contrary to what you’d like the truth to be, you are on your way to meeting Death.

And we all have different ideas about how we'd like to go. Most of us are hoping to go quietly and in our sleep, surrounded by loved ones.

But, if I could be frank, this is a waste of your time and energy. You're better off accepting that Death will show up whenever and wherever he will and using your valuable time and energy, instead, to live.

• Reflection title: Car Accident? Disease? Jelly and Ice Cream?
• Creative inspiration: Terry Pratchett, Carpe Jugulum
• Reflection Question: Do I have unrealistic expectations or hopes when it comes to my own death? Am I wasting too much time and energy thinking about this?

March: On Death

March 3

Today's reflection was inspired by a quote from Kenzaburō Ōe's Hiroshima Notes.

There is a biological urge to live on. But have you ever really thought about what that means?

What do you want to live on when you're gone? Your genes? DNA?

Or would it be better for your actions and ideas and kindness to be passed on and echo through the generations after you've left this good Earth?

Consider it, and consider the way you live now. Is it up to your standards to live on?

• Reflection title: How Will You Live On?
• Creative inspiration: Kenzaburō Ōe, Hiroshima Notes
• Reflection Question: If I were to die today, how will I live on in others?