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Many people struggle to love themselves when they’re in a relationship. They become so consumed with the other person they forget how to feel like themselves again. However, truly loving someone else happens only when you know how to love yourself. Today, I’m interviewing Laura Denke, a licensed marriage and family therapist, on the importance of positive self-talk and compassion when trying to foster long-lasting relationships.
She talks about...
- How negative internal thoughts can often lead to relationship problems. [4:52]
- Learning positive self-talk and being kind to yourself. [8:45]
- Recognizing good thoughts and questioning bad thoughts. [10:21]
- Being your own source of love. [14:14]
- Being aware of and getting out of abusive relationships. [18:54]
- How clear and effective communication lead to long-lasting relationships. [21:11]
- Practices to maintain your sense of self in relationships. [23:16]
- Viewing relationships as a mutual partnership. [25:09]
- Knowing yourself and your own values when getting to know another person. [30:27]
- The importance of being a giver and being with someone who is a giver as well. [35:08]
QUOTES
“I had done the best I could. My parents knew it, so I knew it, so I could have compassion on myself...That became a marvelous paradigm for my life, of not criticizing myself because I did the best I could.”
“Another reason that I can give myself positive self-talk is because I’m here to learn and grow, and every day is a learning and growing experience.”
“It’s about making mutual goals together...Destination-dating is learning about a person’s personality and what kind of partner they would be.”
WEEKLY AFFIRMATION
I feel an expansive, warm, never-ending love for myself. I allow myself to be open in close relationships because my trust lies in the foundation of God and the universe. And through that powerful energy, I am always safe and whole, regardless of how others deal with their own wounds.
RESOURCES AND LINKS MENTIONED
Sign up for our webinar: The 3 Secrets Behind Building An Intentional Life with Amanda Tobe
Ten Secrets for Achieving a Successful Celestial Marriage*
Don’t Get Engaged (Until You Read This Book)*
Before Your Wedding*
Laura Denke’s Official Sit
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