Sour Patch Kids have a new jam that could make your potty a disco, everything you buy is about to go up in price, most of our stuff is crap and Popeyes has a new bundle....

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Happy Ash Wednesday, AI is not why kids are cheating, your sign may determine how you file your taxes, cars prices are gonna get super high and we all lie about peeing in the shower. 

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Arby's is resurrecting a fan favorite, ladies get serious about their health at a certain age, we're getting the right to repair, Walmart says we're getting pinched and we haven't seen many new movies. 

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Hooters says they're fine and totally not broke, Andrew Tate is back here, kids can keep your brain preserved and over half of us lie at home!

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Beer is joining eggs, we're not supposed to buy anything today, a Jersey massage parlor owner has the worst name ever and we all eat trash!

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Denny's is on that egg surcharge train, over half of us think porn should stop when things get serious, we don't trust self-driving vehicles and Wingstop is getting crispier!

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Joanne Fabrics is dunzo, two weeks without your phone is going to make things all better, egg smuggling is a thing, one night of bad sleep can make you sick  and Lester Holt is hanging it up!

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We use loads of space for golf courses, there is a new, even better weight loss drug on the market, the flu is going to kill us all, DQ has a new jam and a classic is back at Arby's!

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7Up has a new jam, we may be giving the chickens vaccines, Hooters is going belly up and Ketamine is up, way up!!

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Panera has a new sammich nobody asked for, we have an OnlyFans beef, using punctuation could start a fight, an asteroid is going to smoke us all and half of dudes have never asked a woman out in person!

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