The Leaves of a Victim never more with Steven Wilson

This episode is another Letter to someone special to me.  I have spent many hours in therapy trying to understand our dynamic.  I have tried in vain to comprehend my own broken heart.

I know I hurt her.  I know she brought me back to humanity.  The Monolithic human stone felt again; I just couldn’t handle feelings.

I love Lekechia, but we do not talk.

My sadness is beyond words right now.  Perhaps the art therapy along with this letter may help me with this process.

I doubt it, but perhaps.

This episode I write another letter, but this one is to my childhood best friend from Crystal Lake, IL.

Jeff lived on Millard st. And I lived on Gardina which is called the Vista or at least is was back then.  We were both the babies or last born in our families.  He had two older brother; dan and Tom.  I had an older sister Marie.

We went to West elementary together and called ourselves the Millard Mayhem crew.  It was our possible WWF wresting tag team name when we got older.

This episode I write a letter to my first love Mark Wilson (no relation).  He was my first and only relationship with another male.  In therapy it was discussed about my sexuality confusion during this time after the sex abuse I suffered from the Teacher.

I have spent many sessions talking about Mark and I; and the conclusion was that I never grieved for his lose.  Which caused latent and repressed feelings of remorse.

This episode is about my relationship with my older sister Marie who died in a car accident one day after our father had died from COPD Emphysema.

this show took place right after a NA meeting .  Our speaker told her story and how she dealt with different kinds of fear on many occasions.

Fighting the fear is unique to us all as is the act of identifying the things that scare us into trying to escape through drugs or by other means.

I maintain the same format as the first episode and compose a letter to my father.  The letter deals with deception, disappointments, and enabling.

I have decided to begin by using a therapeutic technique called “Letter to” which is what I would say to the person or persons that I hurt or the person or persons that hurt me.

This episode  is to the Teacher who raped and sexually abused me.

There are explicit details which may trigger your own past traumas so please be careful.