The Misdemenors of Grindelwald! A better film than you'd think but lacks the crimes you'd expect. Jon and Pri question how the Imperius curse works, get suckered into chatting sh*t about JK R*wling, and ponder whether you can apparate onto the Hogwarts grounds or not (a plot point around which an entire novel was based but now seems to be a completely arbitrary rule oh my god make up your mind JK). Strap in friends, because World War II still did happen.

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, one of the greatest movies ever to be based on a fictional textbook mentioned one time. Jon and Pri talk about draconian wizard laws, She Who Must Not Be Named, and where to actually find beasts. They're closer than you think!

Welcome to Alien Court, where we put the film Alien: Covenant on trial for little mouth crimes. Jon is sick (of everyone's Prometheus saltiness) and Pri breaks big news about Michael Fassbender's forthcoming autobiography You Blow, I'll Do the Fingering. Scott Fest hasn't come early but enjoy this episode anyway or leave the country please.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is long, full of problems, and will make you cry at the end regardless. Jon and Pri break down the film by talking about aging, Jared Harris (son of Dumbledore), and Parisian drivers. Listen in while you stand in line at the French DMV to get your suspended license back, you cobble-stoned maniac.

This one time, on this podcast, we talked about a superior sequel film known as American Pie 2. We wonder what happened to Jason Biggs, the most underrated performance in the movie, and whether Stifler has been a woke king this whole time. Glue your hand to your other hand and listen along.

**STRONG CONTENT WARNING** Our annual dip into the nightmare highway that is CanCon. We chat about a film that made Francis Ford Coppola refuse to give an award and had audiences nationwide f*cking t**lpipes with reckless abandon. Not your dad's Crash!

Eternals, drop the "the", it's cleaner. As the first podcast to ever criticize the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Jon and Pri keep it light by talking about the complete death of art, Brian Tyree Henry's Sexiest Hands in Hollywood Award, and selfie sticks. Jon is a few beers deep and busting out the Arishem voice and if anyone has a problem they can take it up with Captain Wildebeest and Left Fist. There will be chafing!

We are the Lord of War now! Back in cinema's greatest year, 2005, we welcome back friends of the pod Cage, Leto, Moynihan, and Baggins. A film with major issues and real acting. We talk about bad song choices, Viktor Bout's three-point percentage, and what would happen if ISIS got ahold of Midjourney. It's just that dog in us.

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty: Demystified. One of Pri's favourite films enters the octagon where Jon reveals his nefarious ties to the Papa John's conglomerate, we establish the pod's official stance on Greenland and the Taliban, and try to talk Icelandic to great critical acclaim. Greenland: not even once.

Men! The 2022 Alex Garland film that shocked all five people who saw it. Jon and Pri chat about the criticism levelled at the movie and what it means. We chat an inordinate amount about She Said and touch on the existential horror of being in Britain. Birth rocks and so does this movie!