Noise Bois, I hope you’re ready for some SELF INDULGENCE because this episode HAS IT. Easily half the episode is about Aerosmith going to Denny’s, then:

Dave and Joel discuss how Slash only has a few axe tricks up his sleeveWhat Lynyrd Skynyrd’s mommas told themWho’s in the room when Metallica records a coverDave’s years long quest for Michael McDonaldRage Against Tennessee WilliamsJust after Joel gets serious about his deep love and admiration for Queens of The Stone Age, the boys try their hand at Parched Stoner Desert RockThe boys offer new James Bond Themes courtesy of Uncle Kracker, JackWhite and Scooby DooFinally Metallica are revealed to be masters of ACTUAL puppets

Dave and Joel start this episode out LITERALLY trapped in the ACTUAL Noise Hole. It’s a harrowing experience and they’re lucky to be alive.

Vicious lies are told about Glenn Danzig, which he staunchly refutesThe Misfits weigh in on their former singer’s sullied reputationRowan Atkinson fills in for GlennJoel tells the true story of when he got kissed by a RamoneThe boys uncover the secrets of the Ramone ClonesJohnny Cash returns from the grave to cover more Nine Inch Nails songsMorrissey and Danzig spar via songU2 finally admit publicly what an insufferable prick Bono is.

Despite a mountain of technical problems, Dave and Joel manage to crawl into The Noise Hole and emerge with tasty, face melting jams like:

The Fresh Prince of GorillazScatman Basket CaseMetallica dubbed in 8th grade FrenchTuvix Bands (Bad Religion vs. Van Halen)!Michael Anthony is replaced with fancy boy, Wolfgang Van HalenGuns N’ Roses visits Aerosmith’s favorite restaurantDave wants to guitar-monize like Brian MayRoger Taylor wants to fuck your car!Finally, Dave and Joel get hyped for their all new Patreon at patreon.com/noisehole!$5+ Patrons get a post show to this episode!

In this episode:

Dave takes Joel to Slayer SchoolSlayer opens and/or goes to a pizza parlorAmon Amarth becomes Amen AmarthThe bois talk waiting through the opening bandJoel catches up with Coheed & CambriaModern prog band names are discussedThe Flaming Lips are A LITTLE pretentiousScott Ian from Anthrax is revealed to be a bird (this is a fact)Dave Mustaine wishes you a happy birthdayDeath Cab For Cutie welcomes to you the fascist state of Portland, Oregon(?)We get ADDITIONAL birthday greetings from Hitler and the Red Hot Chilli PeppersFinally, Billy Corgan is under your bed, harboring a dark secretDave confides his number one pet peeve to Joel, who doesn’t exploit it in any way.

It’s lucky episode 13, and the boys are comin’ in hot with:

“I Wanna Fuck My Guitar” by Bob SegerTales of making friends and boosting egos at Guitar Center“Can’t Be On Letterman” by Eddie VedderDave and Joel have some strong opinions about the “Beautiful Boys” in Greta Van FleetThe Beachie Boys do “Surf Rock Sabotage” and “I Wish They All Could Be Intergalactic Girls”Prince’s “(Listen All Y’all) It’s Purple Rain” really steals the showDueling Patrick Stump impressionsA Noise Boi tale of Kerry King at Dave & BustersAn extended exploration of Lemmy Kilmister’s love of retro PC and console games!

Episode 14 is a make or break moment in the life of a Noise Boi. You either abandon ship now, or you’re with us forever. Make your choice.

Here’s the playlist:

“Suicide By Cop” by A Band That Sounds Like Dashboard Confessional“Take His Hair To The Dog Pound” by Queen “Poodley Gargle” by Queen“Under Pressure (to write a song)” by QueenYoung David Bowie fights for the rights of long-hairsMy Chemical Romance and their whole deal“Grandparents Are Weird” by Blink 182“Gettin’ Out While I’m Good (Songs For Lil’ Boys)” by Boxcar Racer“Fat Earth Theory” by Blink 182“The Gummy Bears Theme” by Jimmy Eat World“Dave Is The Moon (Reprise)” by Jimmy Eat World

Prepare yourselves, Noise Bois, for an extra long 90 minute episode that contains zero unwarranted, inflammatory and ill-informed opinions about entire complex genre’s of music! It’s time for episode 15, “Jazz Sucks!”

This week:

“Korobeiniki” aka “The Tetris Theme” aka “Death To the West” Jazz is impressive but unnecessaryThe Noise Bois try and fail at jazz“Jazz Sucks” by NOFXPast-Dave bullies a classical guitar boyClassical music destroys lives… in DeGrassi High“I Need 4 Kinds Of Pills” by Alanis Morissette “The Sausage Of The Mountain God” by RUSHRunny Eggs Dio Some of Sum 41Lemmy’s Retro Rundown: Gameboy Edition“Hello Daddy, Don’t Go Away” by WeezerIf Metallica were from Dave and Joel’s home towns… they would be worseDoin’ punch up for bulliesThe Lord needs mood regulating drugsDave’s gone gaga for wah-wahMorrissey and Bob Dylan narrate Dave’s morning“The Ballad of Bob and Dave” by Bob DylanSpruce Bringsteen is Dave’s Boss“Gotta Get Outta This Town (Shana and Jessie’s Song)” by Bruce Springsteen

We’re not gonna lie. Half of this episode is about Glenn Danzig working odd jobs and the other half is almost entirely dick jokes set to music. It’s not an apology, but it might be a warning. Anyway, if you ever wanted to hear Eminem and his urologist trade verses, this is the episode for you.

This week: 

American Psycho Pop PunkWayne Static is dead. All Hail Glenn Static. Glenn Danzig should not be allowed at CVS“Gooch Cream” by Dueling Glenn DanzigsThe ancient rules of having a pet Glenn DanzigA Tour of Castle DanzigGlenn Danzig is a body snatcherLemmy’s Retro Rundown: Majora’s Mask“Legend Of Zelda” by Motorhead Rockstar dick-size chart“Santa’s Comin’ For His Dick” by Sex PistolsRockstar Cabin In The Woods“Would Anyone Like To See The Contents Of My Trousers?” by Morrissey “I’m Sorry If You Saw My Dick (I Need Consent)” by Nine Inch Nails“Dear Dick Doc” by Eminem“Look At My Dick” by Nirvana

Do you hear colors, Noise Boys? Do you SEE sounds?! OH GOD, ARE YOU A MONSTROUS FREAK LIKE DAVE AND JOEL?! FLEE! FLEE TO THE SEWERS TO AVOID PERSECUTION!

This week we've got:

“The World Is In A Minor Key” by The Noise BoysJoel and Dave have Grapheme-Color Synesthesia “Da, I Hear The Garden” by Radiohead“A Higher Brown” by RadioheadOK Computer Demos get Radiohacked “Paranoid MmmAndroid” by Crash Test Dummies“Moo Moo Moo Moo” by Radiohead“Geek Squad Help Desk” by Thom York“Vapes At 7-11” by The DecemberistsThe Blue Fairy changes the lives of service people“I Got The Tire Rotation Blues” by Hank The Tire ManSubway Jimmy ain’t got the bluesWeezer’s covers: Does Rivers delivers?Dave wants to give “Africa” by Toto a swirly Marilyn Manson’s not bad at allKISS isn’t even close to Devil music "The Spooky Jetsons” by Marilyn Manson“Scooby Spooky Doo” by Marilyn Manson“Meet The Flintstones” by Marilyn Manson“Transformers: More Than Meets The Eye” by Marilyn Manson

Join us, Noise Bois, as Dave celebrates his first Father’s Day, while Joel makes it an even dozen, and we delve deeply into rock dads and all their rad daddom.

This week:

“A Man On The 30th Floor” by Death Cab For Cutie“Why Didn’t Daddy Hold My Feet” by Eric Clapton“Tears In Heaven II” by Eric ClaptonHow to become a dad“Sticky Laundry” by Mineral or Texas Is The Reason or maybe The Get Up KidsLemmy’s Retro Rundown: Starfox 64“Tears In Heaven” by MotörheadLemmy’s secret sonRock and Roll DadsBowie is the Grand Galactic DaddyDave Grohl is the ideal rock dad“Punk Dads Are The Best” by Green Day“When Dad Comes Around” by Green Day“Daddy-O, Let It Go” by Jakob Danger Armstrong“Workin’ Dad” by Green Day“Eric Clapton’s Not Home” by Eric Clapton"Cat’s In The Cradle (And Dave Is The Moon)" by Harry Chapin“I Love My One And Only Son” by John Lennon“Hey Jube (Don’t Make It Worse)” by Paul McCartney“Hey Linda” by John Lennon