Janeway takes four sad-sack crew members out for some mandatory fun in a gas giant! Can a tightly regimented afternoon of professional development and forced morale building turn these weirdos into Starfleet material? What insane lengths will this season reach in order to avoid dealing directly with its main characters? Should this thrilling look into Janeway’s staff management philosophy have been a two-parter? Is “Good Shepherd” GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

WRASSLIN’ COURT convenes to bring you all the high-flyin’, hard-hittin’, bone-crunchin’ action of what is arguably Season 6’s most boring episode! Will Icheb’s newly found parents put his future in a figure-four leglock? Can Seven of Nine take their nefarious (yet well-obscured) plans to Suplex City? Will Tom hit Neelix with that Sweet Chin Music and send him flying out the airlock? It’s time for Eternal Grapplehug Wrestling, and the in-ring action will answer one big question: Is "Child’s Play" GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

After striking out with holograms, malicious aliens, and holographic cows, Harry Kim decides to try dating the undead! Can his Academy crush be salvaged from her new life as a corpse-recycling alien with great makeup? Will their rekindled love create yet another diplomatic incident for Voyager? Is “Ashes to Ashes” GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

Voyager makes a regrettable return to Fair Haven in an adventure that simultaneously strains the limits of holographic technology, audience credulity, and human compassion. Will Tom and Harry be burned as warlocks, as we always suspected they might? Will Janeway’s digital boyfriend lead the NPC revolution? Will Star Trek writers ever leave the Irish alone? Is “Spirit Folk” GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

Chakotay & chakompany are kidnapped and held hostage by a Borg youth group on the hunt for a new deflector array! Can Harry pull off a daring rescue from within the derelict Cube? Can Seven muster enough parental authority to get these adolescent killing machines under control before Janeway resorts to biological warfare? Will Neelix have to open a Hot Topic in cargo bay 7 to placate the moody Borg teens? Is “Collective” GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

After being kidnapped and conscripted into a pay-per-view space kickboxing league, Seven of Nine has no choice but to become the most electrifying drone in sports entertainment! Can she layeth the smacketh down long enough to keep Tuvok (and herself) alive? Can Acting Captain Chakotay teach Penk (The Great Jeffery Combs) to know his role and/or shut his mouth? Will the Space Court smell what the writers were cookin’? Is “Tsunkatse” GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

Tom, Chakotay, Harry, and Neelix return from an away mission with horrifying memories of atrocities that they maybe, almost probably, did not commit. Can the crew unravel the mystery behind the galaxy’s most aggressive public monument? Will Tom successfully douse his trauma in beer and cartoons? Is “Memorial” GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

After becoming an overnight musical sensation on Planet Jerkwad, the Doctor shockingly decides he prefers adulation over casual disrespect! How they gonna keep him down on the metaphorical farm now that he’s had a taste of fame? Can Janeway crush his dreams in time to save the crew from Chief Medical Officer Tom Paris? Does this finally satisfy the “vocal performance opportunities” clause in Picardo’s contract? Is “Virtuoso” GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

Voyager gets becalmed over a planet with a temporal compression phenomena, leading the planet’s primitive civilization to make a highly questionable choice in personal lord and savior! How will Janeway respond to her new role as angry sky god? Can the crew escape orbit before their worshippers become violently secular? Is “Blink of an Eye” GOOD… or is it GARBAGE?

Tom Paris lures the entire crew into his “Irish Pub in Alpharetta, Georgia” Sims 4 holo-mod. Janeway shocks herself by getting, uh, a little too into the game. It’s (kind of) the exploration of sexy social holo-norms we’ve long awaited! Can the good Captain “Katie O’Clare” reconcile her need to maintain control with her need to not be lonely all the time? Is it possible that we learn a little too much about what Janeway wants in a romantic partner? Is “Fair Haven” GOOD... or is it GARBAGE?