The Shallow End

On episode #164, Linds leads us into The Shallow End with the grim tale of a mortician who found a creative way to cremate bodies more “efficiently.” It’s simple science, actually. Why cremate just one body at a time when you can fit 10 or 12 bodies in the same oven? What could possibly go wrong? Then JG takes us to the shores of Texas’ Gulf Coast, where a young man named Chad saw something so sweet wash up on the beach, he just had to plant a big ol’ kiss on it! Young men in their early 20s, fueled by a thirst for summer adventures and a few too many beers, equals guaranteed hilarity! Slather on the sunscreen and join us in The Shallow End!

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Episode #163 of The Shallow End with Schnebly and Toth has more references to Scotland than you can shake a bagpipe at!  JG shares the story if how Scottish Highlanders weren’t content to stay at home when England was so close. So what did the Highlanders receive in return for their desire to rape, pillage and plunder?  Some karma so big, that it might be one of the biggest Shallow End moments in the history of Mankind! Then Lindsay tells us about a man who went to a “gentleman’s club” in Clearwater, Florida with $300 and a dream. It ended with a call to 911. (That would be HIS call to 911.) Slather on the sunscreen and sit by the deep end, kiddos! ‘Cuz the Shallow End is crowded this week!

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Episode #162 of The Shallow End with Schnebly and Toth is hotter than a doorknob in hell!  Jethro begins with the tale of a man with a shady past who got pulled over by the police in Orange County, CA. When you have a history of brushes with the law, and you get pulled over by the police, what’s the best way to handle it?  That’s easy!  Just tell them you’re someone else!  Say, your brother. Yeah!  Just tell them you’re your brother!  Then Lindsay tells us about a very inventive bank robber who planned “the perfect getaway.” Why bother with a car when you can float a rubber tube down a nearby creek?

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It may be the beginning of summer, but the boys are back at work!  In today’s technology-filled world of crime fighting, Jethro has a story of two criminals brought down mid-crime spree by one of mankind’s oldest problems – good old-fashioned dog poop!  Then Lindsay tells us about a Texas woman who brought an unusual “treat” to her daughter’s fifth-grade school party. Everything was going well – until most of the kids ended up slightly buzzed. And staggering to the nurse’s office. And that’s when the cops were called!  Episode 161 is up and ready to entertain!

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The Shallow End with Schnebly and Toth is a

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Episode #159 is a barn-burner of bad ideas!  Jethro starts off with a Florida Man, a plan, and a few drinks too many.  Maybe not the best time to dream up the idea of “the perfect tattoo.” Oh well – at least it’s permanent! Then Lindsay tells us about a woman who was so upset at not being invited to a (third!)  cousin’s wedding, she exacted the strangest revenge you’ve ever heard. Oh well – at least it resulted in a restraining order. Family is fun!  And so is this week’s episode!

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On episode #158 of TSE, Lindsay leads off with a man in Norway who awoke to the sound of his neighbor trying to wake him in the early morning hours. Why? Because there was a boat where the sky used to be! How does a 150-yard-long cargo ship run aground just outside a quiet living room window? You’ll love the answer!  Then Jethro shares the tale of one of the coolest-headed bank robbers you’ve ever heard of.  Anyone can rob a bank and flee in a screaming getaway car. But what about the cool cucumbers who decide to saunter next door for a haircut and shave before going on the lamb?!

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During this Memorial Week, we take a moment to remember Episode 27! The title for the world's stupidest bank robber is a very competitive division. However, Lindsay may have found a leading contender. Then, Jethro tells us about a bugler who just can't get a break. Attention! If an emergency occurs while listening to this episode, an oxygen mask will drop down from the compartment above your head.

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What word starts with "F” and ends with "uck?” “Firetruck," of course!  Episode #156 hits the ground running with Lindsay’s story about a guy in England who loved him some firetrucks. But scratching that itch to see a big red pumper (!) isn’t always so easy. Then Jethro tells us about a guy who had a novel technique to score not only some quick cash, but two free pizzas!  What went wrong? Well, as Sean Connery so aptly put it in “The Hunt For Red October,” “Not everything in here reacts well to bullets.” Tune in to find out what happened – but remember to wash your hands first!

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On episode #155 of The Shallow End, what would you buy if you had a one-million-dollar bill? At Walmart. Ignoring the fact that the US Treasury doesn’t even print bills that big. Well, JG has the story of a man who used his million-dollar bill to buy a vacuum cleaner. Things got complicated as he waited for the change. Then Linds shares the daring tale of a Kansas man who needed some quick cash to pay off his drug dealer. And if you guessed he decided to use a giant cannon from the Spanish-American War, well, dear listener, your prescience knows no bounds! Get those floaties on your li’l arms, kids! We’re headed for The Shallow End!

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