The Skies We’re Under

In the second of our festive specials, Rachel, Sarah and Lucy talk about how Christmas for many, far from being magic and nostalgic, can simply become a case of ‘just got to get through it’. How for a lot of parents, we so want to feel one thing but the reality of the many emotions we live with become bigger and bigger as December progresses. 

• Adapting plans and expectations for Christmas – what can be ditched? 

Christmas is a time where expectations are highlighted and magnified. Having a child with complex needs takes the ability to create your ‘perfect Christmas’ out of your hands. 

(See our Instagram post for the snow making reel discussed in this episode.)

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In this Christmas episode, we discuss the good, the bad and the ugly of Christmas. We talk the lead up, the lights, the planning, the nativities and the REALITY of Christmas Day, as well as

·      Is Christmas a holiday / break?

·      The experience of a SEN school Christmas / nativity - the carnage, the hilarity, the cuteness and the (in)appropriateness.

·      The emotional overload of the festive season.

·      Christmas presents – buying gifts for a child with complex needs and the overwhelming multitude of people who support them

·      Top tips for gifting including recycling, regifting, wish lists and whether it’s acceptable to buy children everyday essentials.

At a time when expectations of joy and magic are so high, what we often overlook is that reality and lived experience don’t change. Rachel, Sarah and Lucy discuss the importance of keeping in mind who Christmas is for and therefore how best to manage expectations and keep them realistic.

Please rate, review and follow the podcast. You can also DM our social channels, or email [email protected].

#TSWUpodcast #theskieswereunder #valueofeveryone #parenting #disability #disabilityawareness #inclusion #podcast #teamaroundthechild #OT #Physiotherapy #complexneeds #pmld #nursing #specialneeds #specialneedsparenting #autism #learningdisability #cerebralpalsy #epilepsy #livedexperience #communication #coproduction #swearing #laughingisthebestmedicine

Less support + Less equipment + Less routine + Higher expectations = Holidays

Or as we like to call it, having a different kitchen sink. As ever Rachel, Sarah and Lucy give the slightly sweary warts and all version of life, stresses and loves of parenting a disabled child.

Lucy swears more than normal, spoiler alert (none of us have managed a relaxing summer break yet) and we’re all a bit p****d about all the Instagram spam of leisurely summer family trips away.*

Please rate, review and follow the podcast. You can also DM @bornatrighttime, or email [email protected] 

*There is much to be grateful for and we love our children Blah Blah Blah...

Find more about Family Fund for financing holidays here  

Find out about Camp Jojo here  

#TSWUpodcast #theskieswereunder #valueofeveryone #parenting #disability #disabilityawareness #inclusion #podcast #teamaroundthechild #OT #Physiotherapy #complexneeds #pmld #nursing #specialneeds #specialneedsparenting #autism #learningdisability #cerebralpalsy #epilepsy #livedexperience #communication #coproduction #swearing #laughingisthebestmedicine 

So much has happened since the end of Season 1 we thought you might want a catch-up. Brace yourselves though as not much has gone to plan – nothing new there then!

Here we have some of our favourite extracts from Season 1 of The Skies We’re Under podcast. We had to do a ‘best of’ episode because we couldn’t end on episode 19 -that would be all kinds of wrong. 

If you’re wondering whether to listen to any of the episodes, here is a sneak peek at some of our truth telling, laughing and the things we’re learning as we trundle along. 

• Confessions of an optimistic parent 

Thank you for coming back week on week. Please share the podcast with your friends, colleagues, or family as there are lots of great episodes for them to listen to.   

You can email us at [email protected] or follow @bornatrighttime on Instagram and Facebook. As ever, it would be super helpful if you could rate, review and follow the podcast. That way you will know exactly when we are back – we will see you with season 2. 

It’s our last recorded episode of TSWU podcast. As ever we laugh and cry. We tell you the good, bad and ugly truth of the last few months for us and get excited about the upcoming live tour*. 

Thank you for coming back week on week. You don’t need to stop sharing the podcast with your friends, colleagues, or family as there are lots of great episodes for them to listen to.  

You can still email us at [email protected], follow @bornatrighttime on Instagram and Facebook. As ever, it would be super helpful if you could rate, review and follow the podcast so you know exactly when we are back. 

*currently there is no live tour but if you want to host us – get in touch. 

This episode of The Skies We’re Under podcast Lucy, Rachel and Sarah follow on from last week's topic of trust. They talk about we discover is: 

• Trust is hard 

We refer to 

 The thin book of Trust by Charles Feltman 

Atlas of the heart by Brene Brown 

Thank you for coming back week on week. Please share the podcast with your friends, colleagues, or family as there are lots of great episodes for them to listen to.   

You can email us at [email protected] or follow @bornatrighttime on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. As ever, it would be super helpful if you could rate, review and follow the podcast.  

Sarah and Rachel (sorry no Lucy today) are on The Skies We’re Under podcast today talking about how their stories have changed the way they trust themselves. They also prod the possible implosion of trusting the idea that everything will turn out just fine. It seems trust is earned and carved from time, actions and energy. It can’t be conjured from a job title, role or sense of responsibility. So how do we nurture trusting ourselves.  

Also, we cry laughing and pause recording as we pull ourselves together. Thank you so much for listening to The Skies We’re under podcast from whichever of the 34 different countries you are living in.   

To submit your own stories, comments, questions or a poem to the “Don’t put that in your mouth” competition, * you can email the podcast at [email protected] or message us @bornatrighttime on Instagram and Facebook.  

It would be wonderful if you could rate, review and follow the podcast from wherever it is you listen along.  

*prize pending 

This week Rachel, Sarah and Lucy wonder why we label and introduce our children completely differently to anyone else we know. Sarah boasts of her cycling proficiency award while Rachel has ‘musicality’. Who do you think is the most to least competitive amongst us? Listen to find out. 

In the podcast we mention the wonderful Rochelle and her blog My Daily Miracle. Tag some other blogs you find helpful as a parent. 

And tell us all about: 

• The awards you won at and since school. 

DM @bornatrighttime, or email [email protected] 

#TSWUpodcast #theskieswereunder #valueofeveryone #parenting #disability #disabilityawareness #inclusion #podcast #teamaroundthechild #OT #Physiotherapy #complexneeds #pmld #nursing #specialneeds #specialneedsparenting #autism #learningdisability #cerebralpalsy #epilepsy #livedexperience #communication #coproduction #swearing #laughingisthebestmedicine 

When things go really wrong.  

Today, Rachel, Lucy and Sarah discuss a case where the local authority took parents to court for interfering ‘in a combative way’ in relation to the care package for their child. 

Tough content as we try to hold onto the fact that every person involved with our families -commissioners, young people, parents, practitioners- is human.  

Oh, and an update on Mousegate.  

Trigger warning: animals were harmed during the recording of this episode. 

Do email us at [email protected] or connect @bornatrighttime in Instagram and Facebook. We would really appreciate it if you could rate, review and follow the podcast to help us keep recording. 

Link to the court case discussed https://www.bailii.org/ew/cases/EWHC/Fam/2021/2844.html 

http://www.lukeclements.co.uk/a-high-octane-conflict/ 

Institutionalising parent carer blame 

http://www.lukeclements.co.uk/institutionalising-parent-carer-blame/ 

Working together policy 

http://www.lukeclements.co.uk/coroners-criticises-working-together-2018/  

Shifting family dynamics 

https://oadd.org/journal/volume-27-number-2-changing-social-welfare-provisions-and-shifting-family-dynamics/