June 21st-#172 Wisdom Wednesdays

Pain is about perception. I desire to become better through the pain.

I don’t avoid what I fear, I go after what I desire.  As the military branches have said so famously…pain is just weakness leaving the body…but I don’t think it’s really weakness, I think it’s more about awareness.

A friend of mind reminded me about a great principle recently:
A great life isn’t the absence of pain, but a great life is overcoming the obstacles and pains in life.  We lie to ourselves saying that we want things to be easy, that we don’t want to be challenged, but living that way keeps us unfulfilled and it keeps us from growing.  The greatest lessons in my life were the hardest ones.  They made me remember them and they made me remember why I didn’t want to go back there because of the pain I went thru.

That’s why we have death in life, if there was no rush or reason to experience your life, then why would you need to change? You would continue to say, I always have tomorrow. There would be no urgency in learning what you needed to know, and there’d be no satisfaction in working towards something.

When we continue to say I will take care of it tomorrow, we begin to create the habit of living our lives in a comfortable stupor, as we sit in our reclining chair binging on Netflix and over stuffing our faces…and wonder why we never reach our goals, or are so unhappy in our lives.

I’m paraphrasing this quote, but it says, “show me a man without problems and I will show you a man who hasn’t lived.”  So let us understand that the absence of pain or problems isn’t a well lived life, it’s the opposite.  It’s a life not lived.  Let us embrace and be excited about the struggle, not because we like the chaos, but because we love to be challenged—it’s where our greatest growth occurs.

Pain is about perception. I desire to become better through the pain.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

June 20th-#171 Tag Me Tuesdays

I utilize my time wisely

We sometimes get the greatest asset in our lives confused. We go about our lives focusing on how to get more money, we question why we don’t have enough, and we incessantly worry about the future hoping we’ll be prepared for any emergencies that might happen.

Money however, is not your greatest asset.  Time is.  And everyone is given the same, exact, amount of time per day.  Are you spending it wisely, or are you wasting it frivolously?

Are you spending time on the trivial many, instead of discovering the essential few things that truly matter to you?  Are you making your moments matter, are you letting the people in your life know how important they are to you by giving them your best undivided attention time, and are you giving yourself your best time to develop into the human you want to be?

We need to rest, and we should play in life. I’m not saying to keep your life so full of have to’s that you miss out on resting and relaxing and enjoying life…but are you helping to build other people’s dreams and never working on your own?

How can you use your time more wisely today, how can you pursue the things that matter to you, and how can you make your values a bigger part of your life rather than I don’t have time for those things?  You are the captain of your life, you are the one steering where you’re going.  Will you do things that matter, and will you focus on making the most of your time…or will you be constantly saying I’ll take care of that tomorrow, and wondering why the years passed by without you doing anything about what truly matters to you?

I have the hope that today you will focus on the essential few, instead of the trivial many.

I utilize my time wisely.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

June 19th-#170 Mindful Mondays

I am the greatest best friend I know…to myself.

I’ve had great friends support me and help pick me back up when I needed reminders, but I also have been alone in times when I needed the most help.

We need people to support us to become better people, but no one will be there for us 100% of the time, and sometimes even our most loyal of friends won’t know how to help us at times.  People can give us good advice, they can give us money when we need it, and they can literally pick us up during our worst times…but if we aren’t willing to pick ourselves up when we need it…then it won’t matter how much someone can help us.

My grandfather told me a piece of advice he learned in the army from his drill instructor.  The drill instructor would constantly say…”I can’t make anyone do anything, but I can sure make you wish you did.”  And for the people who didn’t listen to that drill instructor they paid for whatever their sins were with pushups, hard work, and a good butt whooping from time to time.

The reason I bring this up, is no matter how much someone wants to help another, if that person doesn’t want it, it won’t matter.  How good of a friend are to yourself? Do you pick yourself up when you’re down, do you talk kindly and offer words of support and encouragement to yourself, and do you believe in yourself?

It’s great to have friends and good influences around us, but if we don’t work to be our own best friend, if we don’t work to be the best influencer to ourselves…well, it won’t matter how many times people pick us up because we didn’t put the work into loving ourselves enough to help us change.

The greatest catalyst of changing your life for the better… is you, and the only way you can do that is by being your best friend…It’s by doing what a best friend would for another… are you your greatest best friend you know?

I am the best friend I know….to myself.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

June 18th-#169 Smiling Sundays

I forgive myself

It’s easy to put the blame on ourselves when things don’t go how we planned. A good friend of mine and I were talking years ago in my early 20’s and I asked him what were the qualities of a man, and he said “the willingness to take responsibilities for my mistakes.”

I think that’s a great quality but if we have the tendency to beat ourselves up over those mistakes—that’s where it can get more harmful than helpful. Yes, we shouldn’t the victim, we should own up and take responsibilities for our mistakes, but we should also forgive ourselves for our mistakes too. If you don’t forgive yourself you stay stuck in a negative emotion, and then it’s harder for you to see the lesson you were meant to learn.

We will make mistakes in our lives, it’s guaranteed. We should learn from those mistakes and take ownership when we need to, but we should always be loving and kind to ourselves in the process.  The greatest thing we can do for ourselves is to love ourselves…through the good times…and especially the bad times.  Some of the greatest support I got was from picking myself back up, giving myself a pep talk, and getting back out in the game of life to love and live again.

If you think about it, when you are putting yourself out there and really challenging to reach your best self, you will be making mistakes. That’s how growth happens, by asking more of ourselves and going all in…and KNOWING we will make mistakes.  Mistakes help us learn the lessons faster…so let us forgive ourselves for making mistakes, it just means we are putting our best self out there more often.

I forgive myself regularly.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide

June 17th-#168 Synergy Saturdays

I put all my energy into people who return it back.

We all have our own issues. No one’s perfect.  And maybe we put our time and effort into the wrong people.  The people who never forgive you, the people who make sure to blame you for their problems, and the people who make sure to hurt you because they are hurting inside.

I think we should care about these people, we maybe should even have more deliberate thoughts and prayers towards them, but if they make sure to give you nothing in return, then maybe it’s time to put your energy somewhere else. I know for me I want to help everyone, I want to heal everyone, I want everyone to feel good…but there are some people who could care less about me and sometimes even go out of their way to make sure I know it.

I know I have my own issues and maybe even trying to make EVERYONE happy comes from my insecurities of trying to make everyone accept me or like me.  I will remember that sometimes I cannot heal those who don’t want to be healed. I will remember that sometimes the only thing I can do is to pray, wish them well, and pivot from trying so hard towards healing them and begin putting my energies into people and things that return back what I give out.  I am a powerful being, but not when I allow someone else to hurt me. I am in control of my thoughts, emotions, and actions…I will work to put my energy into people and things that build me up as well

I put all my energy into people who return it back.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide
Podcast: The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

June 16th-#167 Fantastic Fridays

Thank you

I say thank you every time I feel pain of a memory that keeps haunting me. It helps to release the pain by focusing on the opportunity and the lesson of having that instance in my life.  It’s not the letting go of the pain but it’s more of acknowledging the pain and pivoting to a more constructive energy that helps me to move on instead of stay stuck.

I say thank you every time I see the sunrise.  Two simple words actually are a complexly beautiful process I set in motion.

It is me saying thank you to God for granting me another day, it is me saying thank you for the warmth of the sun upon my skin, it puts me in anticipation for all the gifts of the day instead of just surviving my day, it calms my breathing and helps me to take deeper breaths and slow down so I can my body what it physically needs, it directs my thoughts upon the beauty rather than only seeing what is wrong, it makes me more confident as I remember I am in a beautiful spot of choice not one of despair, and it helps me to stop living in the past or the future by helping me to live in the moment. It gives me the choice to be here instead of missing the beauty of my life.

So how can you say thank at the beginning of your day?

Is it when you wake up, is it when you leave for the day and you say thank you to your partner for having them in your life, is it when you’re traffic as you say thank you for the delays and the traffic jams reminding yourself that it’s good to have a little extra time to yourself to think in your car, is it when you hug your kids tighter before they leave as you say thank you for being such loving and kind individuals, or is it when you see a sunrise that’s positioning your attitude of gratefulness in motion for the rest of the day.

I say, Thank you…all the time.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide
Podcast: The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

June 15th-#166 Thoughtful Thursdays

Everyone who has come into my life was here for a reason.

We can get upset when people leave us.  We can get upset when we allow the wrong people into our lives, and thus we punish ourselves for allowing it to happen…but what if we were to stop beating ourselves up for our mistakes and pivot to a new way of thinking. A way of congratulating ourselves for the lessons we learned from these people and situations.

No one is perfect and we all make mistakes. Sometimes we make the mistake of seeing someone for who we WANT them to be…rather than who they are.

I know I like to see the best in people, so sometimes I allow people to walk all over me because I know they can change. I also have to remember that the way I react or the energy I bring to a situation changes the whole outcome of an encounter. Do I bring a higher energy of love and seeing truth, or do I bring an energy of fear, of trying to please and make sure everyone is happy rather than speaking my truth?

Let us look to find the best in people, but also let’s not be unfair expecting people to be a vision of what we expect of them.  We must respect ourselves above all else first, so we can allow people to show us their true selves, not what we want of them.  Let us not work to change people, but to love them as they are…so they feel comfortable to reach for their best self…not because we wanted it, but because they did.

Everyone who has come into my life was here for a reason.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide
Podcast: The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

June 14th-#165 Wisdom Wednesdays

My mind is the best computer I know…so I’ll use it wisely.

I’ve personally had very close family and friends who have developed Alzheimer’s or dementia, and it’s a sad thing to see someone deteriorating before your eyes.  The conversations are labor intensive as you try to find a way to connect and to be with the person you knew, when there are only blank stares or quietness.  I’ve learned not to care so much about the answers anymore, as they don’t fit what I was expecting, so I work to just enjoy my time with the individual.

And the reason I tell this story, is because we all could be on a path like that If we don’t take consideration and care with the movements of our lives. A study done by Miia Kivipelto and Krister Hakansson was cited in the magazine Scientific American and it found that improved diet, physical exercise, mental and social stimulation, and management of cardiovascular problems can improve cognition even after the age of 60.

As we get older we do the same thing over and over again…well the older we get we tend to find what works for us and we keep doing the exact same routines and decision making for years. Our brain thinks that the better it gets at something then the better it is for us, and that’s true on one front. We take less time to do things, but we also use less cognitive function when we stop trying to become better.

I’m not telling you that you have to change your routine, but when you aren’t challenging your mind by doing new things, when you aren’t exercising your body and mind, and when you aren’t finding ways to better what you’re doing rather than ONLY finding what feels good… you might be on the same path of those individuals most likely to develop dementia and Alzheimer’s.

This is not to scare you, but to let you know that your brain is one of the greatest computers you’ll ever utilize, but when you stop using it, cobwebs develop…and the rust begins to build.  The body only knows to functions to grow…or to decay. So let us work on using the best computer we know efficiently everyday by challenging the mind, our bodies, and being social with the people who make us feel alive.

My mind is the best computer I know…so I will use it wisely.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide
Podcast: The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

June 13th-#164 Tag Me Tuesdays

I’m not here to fit in, I’m here to stand out.

I get it, it feels good to know we belong, to know that people think the same way or even act the same way we do.  There’s comfort in knowing things will be the same with the people we hang out with or the places we frequent.  But if we’re only trying to fit in, are we not being our authentic selves? Are we not trying to stir waves because it’s easier to hide in a crowd.

Some of the greatest personal growth came from hanging with and getting to know people who thought differently than me. I was willing to hear them and listen, not just interject my opinion into all of our conversations. I think there’s extreme beauty in trying to understand people instead of judging them immediately.

If you’re hiding your real self so you won’t feel awkward, be called out for thinking differently, or maybe even be ostracized for being your real self…then you are doing the people closest to you a disservice.  They don’t know the real you.  It’s kind of like dating, we try to put our best foot forward and look more amazing than we are, and it’s not that we aren’t awesome but there is a faking about it…and what will ALWAYS happen is sometime in the future the real you will come out.

An interesting fact is the word- “Person” originated in Latin from the word persona…which means ‘actor’s’ mask.  And people talk about being their own person, which if you think about the origin of theat word it means to be their own mask. So what if we were to stop trying to be the mask, what if we were to unveil ourselves and be seen for who we truly are. The greatest achievements have been from people working to stop denying their real self. 

How can you be the REAL you for yourself first, and then begin branching off to your friends and family, and then the world?  You will be doing them a favor letting the see the best you, the vulnerable you, the beautiful you, the unmasked you.

I’m not here to fit in, I’m here to stand out.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide
Podcast: The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast

June 12th-#163 Mindful Mondays

A healthy body begins with a healthy mind. I surround myself on thoughts that build me up.

Let’s face it…It feels good to feel good. And a good portion of the time we are being unhealthy in every aspect of our lives because of where we allow our mind to wander off to.

We seem to find it hanging out smoking in the boys room, or girls room for you ladies, with the bad kinds of thoughts…selfishness, anger, jealousy, greed, complacency and slothfulness, self criticism and judging, hate, and everyone’s favorite internal nagging.

It’s great to put our attention on what type of thoughts we focus on, but it’s also crucial that we pay attention to what we surrounding ourselves with. What types of TV shows are you watching, what type of music are you listening to, who are you hanging out with, and what are you reading and spending your time on?

It's not that you have to be so focused on being a goody two shoes, but it’s about understanding that what you surround yourself with is what you become.  I won’t single out any type of music, but I no longer listen to negative music that is cussing, focusing on the frivolous things in life, degrading ceratin types of people or groups…even if in that music they feel it’s accepted. 

For tv now, Yes… I do watch programs that can be dark, but I also work to guard my mind from them. I love detective shows probably because I’m always interested in why killers or murders think the way they do. I also love how detectives solve a mystery.

When I watch these programs I work to not just go into zombie mode, but rather into processing mode. I work to not allow my mind be warped into the negativity and darkness of the show, and I work to keep asking myself why am I watching this? And for me it’s about solving mysteries and learning more about human behaviors.

I’m not telling you to cut out things that you enjoy, but what I am challenging you to look at…is if what you are surrounding yourself with…is really making a positive impact in your life?  We waste so much time on things we think that have no influence on us, but in the end I want to have the best thoughts I can, and I want to surround myself with the best things I can.

My mind is a beautiful gift. I work to keep it functioning towards the beautiful and amazing parts of life.

A healthy body begins with a healthy mind. I surround myself on thoughts that build me up.

Thanks for listening.  I'm sending great energy your way as we become Strong Within together,
Personal Development Life Coach-
Chris O'Hearn

Contact info- email: [email protected]  phone:865-219-3247

Music by: Basematic-Zest
Location: Knoxville, Tennessee USA but available worldwide
Podcast: The Strong Within Daily Affirmation Podcast