The Therapist Perspective

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Should men be the sole Providers and Protectors?  Is that not wat women want?  We hear it all of the time.  I belive that the it is okay for men to be providers and protectors. But we as men are more than that.  It is good for us men to explore what else we are as human beings, other than the roles that society has encouraged us to play. 

This episode provides a broader perspective on how assuming the role of provider and protectors affect relationships.  

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Whe know what we should be doing to improve our lives.  But why don't we just do it?   And why don't other people just do what they should be doing.  
It's not that difficult, right?   
Listen and find out why it is so difficult to create real change.  It can be a useful episode to start the New Year.

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Relationship problems are normal, right?  Yes and No.
 It's true that most relationships require that couples work out issues.  It's part of growing and building a healthy relationship.  However, too much conflict creates tension.   This episode focuses on the different types of conflicts that come up in relationships.  The fact is that not all conflicts are created equal.  Listen to learn about the conflict that you might be experiencing in your relationships.  

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One of the most important aspects of a healthy relationship is learning how to get yourself out of the way.  We don't realize how much we get in the way of our relationships.  
This episode explores the value of not making it about you and the different reasons we tend to get in our own way.  You might be doing it right now to a loved one, or someone is doing it to you. 

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You might be in a relationship with a selfish person and not even know it.  Or maybe you did know it but didn't know how to describe their type of selfish.  
This episode helps identify 3 types of selfish people.  
When we are able to identify a selfish person we can learn to protect ourselves by setting firm boundaries. 

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Is fairness in a relationship 50/50?  How are we supposed to determine what is fair in a relationship?  
This episode explores the concept of fairness and how to break down barriers that get in the way.  I believe that fairness is possible.  But it would first have to take a  complete breakdown of old gender rules that are getting in the way. 

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I believe that being decent is too low of a standard for men.  The bar is too low when we aim for decency.  Let's be good men.  
Being a good man is not about how much we provide or protect.  It is about how good we are to our partners and family.  
There is one significant feature in men that get in the way of becoming good men.  This episode breaks down what we need to do as men to go from being decent to being good men.  

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There is a difference between a relatinoship that is thriving and one that is surviving.   I believe that a couple could be more in love 20 years later than the day the got married.   Happily ever after is possible when we learn to thrive in a relationship.   

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Are we being our true selves?  How would we know?  We all feel that we are being authentic, but when we dig deeper we might realize that we are the person others want or need us to be.  Ruby and I talk about what it means to be authentic and how to develop your sense of self.  Self discovery will come with changes to your life and your relationships.  So it takes courage to live your true self.  

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Some of us don't realize the power of boundaries.  Boundaries are vital to creating healthy relationships.  In this episode I talk about why boundaries are necessary and how to create boundaries in a healthy relationship.