The Young Gaffers | An irreverent look at The Beautiful Game

Wherein Our Heroes sit down for a chat with Vancouver Whitecaps goalkeeper Marco Carducci, are confused by Bruce Arena, and might be havin’ Ashley Cole’s move to LA Galaxy. Also, the three Canadian MLS clubs complete some important off-season signings. More Premier League next week!

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Music by: Bear Mountain - www.facebook.com/mybearmountain

Wherein Our Heroes bask in the glory of football’s Awards Season. Lionel Messi’s dark brown hair makes him a shoo-in for the Ballon d’Or and Aubameyang’s coif nets him the CAF Player of the Year. Also, Balotelli plays “Piss in Boots”, Liverpool emulates Taylor Swift, and Brad Guzan and Joleon Lescott get chewed out by Aston Villa supporters. Manchester United finally show some impetus to the relief of Paul Scholes.

Send us your questions or comments via e-mail to [email protected], @younggaffers on Twitter, and www.facebook.com/theyounggaffers

Music by: Bear Mountain - www.facebook.com/mybearmountain

Wherein Our Heroes roll up their sleeves, pull on their raw Japanese selvedge denim, straighten their bow ties, and debate the efficacy of the Trequartista. Zlatan drops knowledge bombs, Adidas gets all snarky about Manchester United’s style, and we name the definitive “Hipster Starting XI”. Also, Benitez gets sacked, Vardy puts his name in lights, and poor Seamus drinks his own urine – we hear it tastes just like PBR. Oh, and we review some organic, fair-trade, artisanal matches.

Send us your questions or comments via e-mail to [email protected], @younggaffers on Twitter, and www.facebook.com/theyounggaffers

Music by: Bear Mountain - www.facebook.com/mybearmountain

Wherein Our Heroes get verklempt over coffee talk. Manchester United and Chelsea...no big whoop. Arsenal have a mixed Holiday Season. Francesco Becchetti dupes...who knew? There are many haircuts to discuss amongst yourselves. Also, Per Mertesacker wipes his shpilkis on an unsuspecting admirer's genechtagazoink.

Send us your questions or comments via e-mail at [email protected], @younggaffers on Twitter, and www.facebook.com/theyounggaffers

Music by: Bear Mountain - www.facebook.com/mybearmountain

Wherein Our Heroes imbibe liberally and spread tidings of joy and happiness. Stevie G suffers a lacerated Yule Log, a former England international is on the Naughty List, and Pogba proves a little dab will do him. A Christmas Classic is given the Gaffers treatment, and two very special guests cover a Yuletide staple. Happy Holidays!

Send us your questions or comments via e-mail at [email protected], @younggaffers on Twitter, and www.facebook.com/theyounggaffers

Wherein Our Heroes explore why Petr Cech would be moved to eat himself, a star of the Italian Silver Screen rubs up against the business side of football, and Vardy is salty while Mahrez is sweet. We rue the fact that one Monk has no attachments, and Zanetti so easily finds the warm ball. Also, Gazza takes it too far (again) and our hats are off to Ataturk. Tune in next week for our Yuletacular Special!

Drop us a line via e-mail at [email protected], @younggaffers on Twitter, and www.facebook.com/theyounggaffers

Music by: Bear Mountain - http://music.mybearmountain.com

Wherein Our Heroes get all Deutsche up in this Nordecke and pull out their Postsack to answer your burning questions. Der Kraftwürfel shines for Stoke City, Marwin Hitz causes a Modeste miss and the MLS Cup Final is wunderbar! Also, the president of “Le Coq” is not havin’ any sex scandals, Jack Warner plumbs new depths, and Rodney Wallace bobs and weaves his way through a barrage of beer cans all the way to the illustrious “Haircut of the Week” award.

Music by: Bear Mountain - http://music.mybearmountain.com

Wherein Our Heroes hope the MLS Cup runneth over, a cast is discussed for Jamie Vardy's life on celluloid, Manchester United continue to bore, Arsenal's infirmary continues to burst at the seams, and we are not having Diego Costa's pathetic attempt at insubordination. Also, Leeds fans are collectively awarded for their trouble obeying the law.

Music by: Bear Mountain - http://music.mybearmountain.com

Wherein Our Heroes are joined by yet another co-host, Fearghal. The fellas play Mourinho for a day, Liverpool and Spurs run rampant, and it’s a nightmare weekend for The Gunners. Toby Alderweireld’s penchant for the wet-hair look helps him rise above, the Los Blancos faithful jeer the fudge out of their star (who wishes to “retire with dignity”), and the MLS may have been underestimated by Stevie and Francis. Also, we make the case to be hired as scribes for the best buddy dramedy to hit the UK airwaves in decades.

Music by: Bear Mountain - http://music.mybearmountain.com

Wherein Our Heroes are joined by their first-ever guest host, who struggles with The Gaffers’ creed. Formations are obsessed over, Euro 2016 dark horses are released from their barns, and the lads take a pretend gamble on Ronaldinho. Dimitri Payet, Olivier Giroud, and Christian Eriksen are lauded for their performances this season, while Sunderland and Villa are in tough. Also, Brendan is subjected to the dreaded Lightning Round of Awesomeness.

Music by: Bear Mountain - http://music.mybearmountain.com