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18+You are probably not gonna like what is written there. It is extremely sad, aggressive and poorly formed. So, I highly recommend you just play the episode and mind your own business.No. Seriously.Ok. I warned you.I feel like this is the only place where I can whine, which is why this note exists.Some points for understanding. I’m Russian. I’m using a 100 points system for measuring my mental state. Less than 30 is your normal state. 35-50 - I’d love to end this, but it is bearable. 50-75 - extremely difficult to bear. 75-90 - I wish to be dead with all my heart. 90+ - I’m on my way to the place. Literally. Well, I am suicidal. I’ve been thinking about it all my life as an adult and the events taking place from the day this episode was published to the present day have greatly changed the state of my mind. But let’s take one step at a time.24.02 It’s 6 am and I’m crying. I’m devastated. The previous day feels so distant, like it took place years ago. The world has changed. Left several links to the charity in Ukraine.I’m no longer suicidal in the way it was before. This “operation” (now it is even restricted to call it war) has changed my perception of the world. 25.02 Nothing matters. DMarket stole my money.26.02 I took a walk. At this point, I think about all the options for potential blocking and what I should do in each situation. I don’t feel that down anymore. It is more like “I have to become somebody asap, otherwise I’ll have life like in Venezuela”27.02 “Just a reminder: We can treat everyone who supports Ukraine financially as a traitor.” Something like that from my government. 10-20 years in jail. I don’t care. I know that I do everything right.28.02 I have to work much more in order to be able to leave this country. Anxiety kills me. Thinking of adding it to the diary where I write my thoughts and these “suicidal points”02.03 - 82/100 The world is against me. I read lots of stories about how Russians that are living in the USA or Europe are getting treated the way they personally killed thousands. Losing friends, jobs, apartments, relatives (many of us have relatives in Ukraine, btw). I’m really close to the end. I began to perceive others as enemies. “I tried to help Ukraine, I fight the authoritarian regime of a madman with all possible forces, and this is the way I’m treated in a modern world? Then I’m against you.”03.03 - 07.03. This is the time when I still think I can change my life and do my best. I’m anxious, but I don’t think about killing myself (everything is relative, of course). Time of “I have to” 07.03 Upwork blocks us. I lost my job. 08.03 - 44/100. “Russian now is like a German jew in 1940”. I wouldn’t put it this way now, but it is only the beginning. Nazism is my new everyday word (even though it is not quite correct). The country that recently had BLM hates the whole nation. Hypocrites. The old perception of the world and suicidal thoughts slowly began to return. 09.03 I’m crying. I simply wanna live. JUST. LIVE. Where shit like this can’t happen, where I feel safe, where I have opportunities, where I have faith, where I know it can get better, where everyone isn’t trying to scam me, where I can plan having a kid and not think of it like it is a disaster.Making plans how to become independent of the place and the world. 10.03 Trying to forget by immersing myself in films. Deleted hundreds of podcasts one by one. I thought that it might help me, or by expressing my protest in the form of such counter-sanctions. I know how it sounds. Do you know what it's like when you try’re trying to revert to suicidal thoughts? Simply because you at least know how to handle them and what to expect. That is exactly what I’m trying to do.11.03 - 65/100. It is extremely difficult to bear. I’m thinking of making another deadline. Some of you know these descriptions like “459 days remaining”. Yes. Day 0 - day, when I either kill myself, or… Actually, I don’t know what is after “or”. I’ve never thought I’d make it till this deadline (what a descriptive word). And I don’t even know how much time I should give myself to try (and I also know that it works now like that). You can’t even imagine how scary this is, not to be able to do so. By the way, this deadline helped me a little, but I can’t recommend it.And now here it comes. The end of this story. Sounds rather dramatic, but no, this is not what you think it is. So, I need to make another promise, which I’ll break anyway. This is the last time when I write anything in these descriptions. I have to handle everything by myself. I. Hate. Everything. (still, which means I need about a week in order to get back to my normal state (40-50))I started writing this with hatred, but now, when it comes to the end, I realize that I am very nervous to publish this. This is stupid; no one cares; nothing will change; who the fuck do you think you are; why would you even write something like that; I will blame myself later for speaking out one again. But it is what it is. I don’t know why I published it. Maybe to show you that we are not terrible? There is no way I can change your mind, and I don’t exactly know why I care. Yeah, you can tell that you hate only the government, but here is the thing - it is a lie. I feel like I'm being hated, my friends feel the same. Why? Take most of the web services. They refuse to work here because this country is “toxic”. No taxes go to the government, only common people use them. *Here was a little speech*. Anyway, I’ll drop it. That is not even the point of this text (and what is? I don’t know)Told you. Not a nice story.By the way, there is no need to write anything in reviews or in other ways (you somehow manage to find one). I never read reviews and will simply delete messages.I don’t wanna publish it… I’m scared

Re-launched Patreon in order to make more podcasts public. All episodes will be available for everyone, so there is no need in becoming a patron. Use RSS and paste it into your Podcast app. Some apps will be able to recognize it even if you paste it into the search bar.https://www.patreon.com/bestclassicalmusic[00:00:00] - Gentle Dreams - Sight of Wonders[00:01:37] - By the Border - Lama House[00:04:16] - Olga - Helmut Schenker[00:06:28] - Goodnight Story - Magnus Ludvigsson [00:10:04] - Morning Coolness[00:15:35] - Tender Memories - Melodrama[00:17:52] - Sensual Heart, Piano Only[00:20:15] - In the Bleak Midwinter[00:22:23] - The Story of One Life[00:25:13] - Eternal Hope (Full Version) Wave 44[00:27:45] - Mozart Lacrimosa On Piano[00:31:03] - Little Fluffy Clouds 60 sec[00:32:03] - OnTheTune_IMIssYou_MainVersion[00:34:31] - My Sweetest Bride[00:36:10] - Discovering The World[00:38:21] - Markery - Peaceful Morning[00:42:17] - YavorivSky A Quiet Momen[00:44:45] - Aliaksandr Yeletski - Late Autumn[00:47:29] - Ashot Danielyan - Above The Bridge[00:49:38] - Maksym Bubyriev - Cradle Of Dreams[00:52:19] - The Feeling I won't Forget[00:56:20] - Sentimental Dreams[00:58:54] - O Little Town of Bethlehem[01:02:03] - We Found Love[01:04:32] - Flower Fields, Piano Solo[01:10:25] - Calming Piano lop[01:11:10] - Subtle Illusion[01:14:24] - Memories Surround Me[01:16:51] - Beethoven - Sonatina in G-major[01:18:42] - Deck the Halls[01:20:38] - Night Sky[01:22:38] - Yavoriv Sky - Inspirational Vision[01:26:01] - Mikhail Shmatenko - Moon Road On The Water[01:27:20] - Yavoriv Sky - A Quiet Moment. Short VersionMore platforms - https://link.chtbl.com/best-classical-music

Ok. This time this is really Yiruma.0:00 River Flows In You 3:06 Kiss the Rain 7:20 If I Could See You Again 10:46 Love Me 14:52 May Be 18:52 Time Forgets 23:50 Because I Love You 27:22 Fairy Tale 30:04 I 33:10 Hope 34:13 It's Your Day 37:04 On The Way 40:45 Piano 45:25 Sky 47:51 Farewell 53:07 Indigo 55:36 Left My Heart 1:00:44 Painted 1:03:55 Reminiscent 1:07:26 Till I Find You 1:10:42 Wait There 1:14:25 Passing By 1:18:33 Spring Time 1:23:10 With The Wind 1:27:27 Yellow Room 1:35:01 Tears On Love 1:38:33 Stay In Memory 1:48:34 When The Love Falls 1:52:20 Poem And Like A Poem 1:48:43 The Days That'll Never Come

Ok. I messed up with some of the episodes.

Beautiful Relaxing Music

When the last hope runs out

00:00​ Tristan Barton - Interlude02:26​ Gísli Gunnarsson - Birds Of Paradise05:54​ Mustafa Avşaroğlu - When the Last Hope Runs Out08:27​ Linus Johnsson - Nya Dagar13:01​ Revolt Production Music - Lost in You14:59​ Salvatore Lo Presti - Animals Phone Home18:40​ Julien Journet - Sinking In The Rain21:18​ Amann - Believe Reprise24:20​ Julien Journet - Now27:49​ Atis Freivalds - Heartbeats31:10​ FORM '95 - Image34:53​ Salvatore Lo Presti - Endless Sea37:51​ PHANTOM - Uprising39:50​ Atis Freivalds - Last Forever43:30​ Mustafa Avşaroğlu - The Girl in the Woods, She Is Your Destiny46:29​ Sami J Laine - Last Farewell48:52​ Rachel F. Williams - One Last Time Together51:25​ Falk Wünsch - Live58:07​ Atis Freivalds - Above The Light1:00:14​ Tristan Barton - Eris's Debt1:03:56​ Atis Freivalds - You're Beautiful1:06:20​ Synapse Trailer Music - Insight1:08:26​ Brian Jilg - Serenity of Sunrise

00:00​ Tristan Barton - Interlude02:26​ Gísli Gunnarsson - Birds Of Paradise05:54​ Mustafa Avşaroğlu - When the Last Hope Runs Out08:27​ Linus Johnsson - Nya Dagar13:01​ Revolt Production Music - Lost in You14:59​ Salvatore Lo Presti - Animals Phone Home18:40​ Julien Journet - Sinking In The Rain21:18​ Amann - Believe Reprise24:20​ Julien Journet - Now27:49​ Atis Freivalds - Heartbeats31:10​ FORM '95 - Image34:53​ Salvatore Lo Presti - Endless Sea37:51​ PHANTOM - Uprising39:50​ Atis Freivalds - Last Forever43:30​ Mustafa Avşaroğlu - The Girl in the Woods, She Is Your Destiny46:29​ Sami J Laine - Last Farewell48:52​ Rachel F. Williams - One Last Time Together51:25​ Falk Wünsch - Live58:07​ Atis Freivalds - Above The Light1:00:14​ Tristan Barton - Eris's Debt1:03:56​ Atis Freivalds - You're Beautiful1:06:20​ Synapse Trailer Music - Insight1:08:26​ Brian Jilg - Serenity of Sunrise

00:00​ Krale - Memoirs of the Forgotten03:20​ Position Music - Roya - Penitence06:42​ Matthew L. Fisher - The Almighty11:15​ Position Music - Tom Player - Forever Lost14:23​ Gothic Storm Music - Chris Haigh - End Of Days16:10​ Position Music - Time Stands Still - Dreaming Of A Pale Sun18:20​ Trevor DeMaere - Provenance25:12​ Onur Tarcin - infinity27:47​ Peter Roe - Living by the Sword31:39​ Revolt Production Music - A Lonely Heart33:47​ Revolt Production Music - Beyond The Wall36:36​ Trevor DeMaere & David Eman - Narrow Is The Road39:45​ Gothic Storm Music - Chris Haigh - Sea Of Tears42:13​ C21FX - THE VEIL44:43​ Peter Roe - Shared Tears49:05​ Gothic Storm Music - Chris Haigh - Seize Your Glory51:44​ David Eman - Salvation55:16 Afterdark - Max Legend57:24 Angelflare - Hope is a ghost

00:00​ Krale - Memoirs of the Forgotten03:20​ Position Music - Roya - Penitence06:42​ Matthew L. Fisher - The Almighty11:15​ Position Music - Tom Player - Forever Lost14:23​ Gothic Storm Music - Chris Haigh - End Of Days16:10​ Position Music - Time Stands Still - Dreaming Of A Pale Sun18:20​ Trevor DeMaere - Provenance25:12​ Onur Tarcin - infinity27:47​ Peter Roe - Living by the Sword31:39​ Revolt Production Music - A Lonely Heart33:47​ Revolt Production Music - Beyond The Wall36:36​ Trevor DeMaere & David Eman - Narrow Is The Road39:45​ Gothic Storm Music - Chris Haigh - Sea Of Tears42:13​ C21FX - THE VEIL44:43​ Peter Roe - Shared Tears49:05​ Gothic Storm Music - Chris Haigh - Seize Your Glory51:44​ David Eman - Salvation55:16 Afterdark - Max Legend57:24 Angelflare - Hope is a ghost