Thrive After Abuse

How can we learn to listen to our gut instinct if we already doubt our judgment? Sometimes my feelings about a situation don't make sense. Things don't add up logically.

To find out more or to get support: http://www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com

How do you get a narcissist out of your life? I am a female with a female friend who lives about an hour away. I don't see her often but she calls me on her way home from work. I've tried for a long time to have a normal friendship with her but I've given up. I've started researching narcissism and now I'm convinced that she is a narcissist. I've discovered that there have been a lot of them in my life and now I know what to look for. I just need to know how to get this one out of my life without a battle. One way I know is to not react to anything emotionally. Do you have any other tips?

Have a question you'd like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, send me an email me at: [email protected]  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air).  

The live streams happen every Wednesday at 8:30pm EST over on my YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/thriveafterabuse and they run for about 2.5 hours.

 If you are looking for support, I have two support groups (both are free). The first one is on my website: www.thriveafterabuse.com/forum and the second one is on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/HealingAfterNarcissisticAbuse (it is a closed group, but please make sure to read the group rules before you post so that you can change any privacy settings you may need to in order to stay safe). 

Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at:

 Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse

YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse

Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse

ThriveAfterAbuse.com 

In this episode I discuss the pros and cons of trying to warn a new person their their "Prince (or Princess) Charming" is really narcissistic and abusive. 

...Have a question you'd like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, you can send me an email me at: [email protected]  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air), and I'll see what I can do!

Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at:

 Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse

YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse

Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse

ThriveAfterAbuse.com 

Is it me or is it him? Am I being unreasonable? I am so confused. I dated this wonderful guy for six months. We've been on and off. Every time we have a disagreement he gives me the silent treatment. He's a christian and he goes to church. But he's always telling me about how the women in his church like him but he isn't interested in them. We recently got back together and everything was going fine until this woman called his phone and he put it on speakerphone so I could hear the conversation. She seemed really upset and asked him why he didn't tell her he had a girlfriend. This was the second time she called and I grabbed the phone and told her, "Yes, I am his girlfriend and we've been together for six months." He was calm and explained that she was upset because she wanted more than a friendship with him. I'm not sure what to think. But I don't think he's being honest with me. I'm still upset and I told him about it but he doesn't want me to bring it up. He acts like it never happened. I'm feeling angry and frustrated most of the time. I told him to stop calling me so he did. He does not care about my feelings and now I'm concerned he's a narcissist. How do I know for sure he's a narcissist? I know for sure he's a liar.

To find out more or to get support: http://www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com

In this episode, I talk about the types of people narcissists are attracted to and why. 

This is an older episode, and I use the term "codependent" to describe the types of people overt narcissists are attracted to, but I feel that needs some more explaining.

I was using the term "codependent" to refer to the kind of person who is an "over-giver." Someone who continually gives a person second and twenty-second chances, doesn't have any deal breakers or solid boundaries, and who is quick to put others (especially overt narcissists) first and themselves last. I also touch on in the end that not all people who act this way are necessarily codependent. (My definition of codependency is where one person clings to relationships because they need others to make them feel loved or "complete" often with disasterous consequences.)

Many people who are/were forever holding onto hope that another person could change, and putting their wants and needs last (myself included) do so because they may not have ever realized that dangerous and destructive people could be in their lives as a significant other, parent, friend, coworker, therapist, etc. This simply wasn't on our radar, and so once we know better, we can start to do better. 

Do you think that a narcissist is attracted to a particular type of person? I'm asking because I've been in several relationships with several different narcissists.

To find out more or to get support: http://www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com

My narcissist up and left me recently for somebody else. I'm in a tremendous amount of pain and I can't seem to wrap my mind around why her and not me? What's different about her and why is he treating her better?

YouTube video series that I mention at the end of the podcast: https://youtu.be/SoMYqD52Rxo?list=PLcjFWuvIFFzJoo_mlUTWBGHhz9DXc7t5J

(The main video in this series that I think will be helpful is the one called, "Want to Know WHY you Are Dating a Narcissist?)

Have a question you'd like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, send me an email me at: [email protected]  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air).  

The live streams happen every Wednesday at 8:30pm EST over on my YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/thriveafterabuse and they run for about 2.5 hours.

 If you are looking for support, I have two support groups (both are free). The first one is on my website: www.thriveafterabuse.com/forum and the second one is on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/HealingAfterNarcissisticAbuse (it is a closed group, but please make sure to read the group rules before you post so that you can change any privacy settings you may need to in order to stay safe). 

Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at:

 Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse

YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse

Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse

ThriveAfterAbuse.com 

In this episode, the question of what a normal relationship is discussed.  It's very common for a person to come out of a relationship with a narcissist, and to be so confused as to what's normal (because they've been told the whole time that all this abusive or problematic behavior they've been experiencing is normal). I discuss the difference between normal and healthy, as well as why aiming for "normal" can be problematic in it's own way.  

...Have a question you'd like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, you can send me an email me at: [email protected]  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air), and I'll see what I can do!

Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at:

 Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse

YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse

Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse

ThriveAfterAbuse.com 

Can you talk more about boundaries? What are healthy boundaries? Are there unhealthy boundaries? I've been told in my past that I've been violating boundaries. But once my eyes were opened I realized that it was just another way for the narcissist to lie to me and blame me for being wrong.

Have a question you'd like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, send me an email me at: [email protected]  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air).  

The live streams happen every Wednesday at 8:30pm EST over on my YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/thriveafterabuse and they run for about 2.5 hours.

 If you are looking for support, I have two support groups (both are free). The first one is on my website: www.thriveafterabuse.com/forum and the second one is on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/HealingAfterNarcissisticAbuse (it is a closed group, but please make sure to read the group rules before you post so that you can change any privacy settings you may need to in order to stay safe). 

Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at:

 Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse

YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse

Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse

ThriveAfterAbuse.com 

How do I get over the fantasy love bombing? I keep coming across information that says I'll never find that charm again. My therapist says I need a boring guy. But I don't want a boring guy. I'm having difficulty letting go of all that magical stuff regardless of all the crap my ex narcissist has done.

To find out more or to get support: http://www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com