In episode 123 of the Beyond the High Road podcast, Shelby Milford discusses the sensitive and complex topic of parental alienation (PA) and whether or when to inform your children about it. Shelby highlights the importance of focusing on one's own healing as a prerequisite to addressing PA with children. She outlines two main scenarios where it might be appropriate to discuss PA with children: when they come to you with questions and when you have nothing left to lose. Shelby emphasizes the need for humility, all-encompassing love, and a clear understanding of one's motives before engaging in such conversations. She also provides practical advice on teaching critical thinking skills to children and the importance of validating their emotions. Throughout the episode, Shelby underscores the significance of approaching the topic with a mindset geared towards connection and understanding, rather than defense or blame.

00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview

00:12 The Dilemma of Telling Your Kids

01:47 When to Tell Your Kids About Alienation

05:21 Preparing for the Conversation

08:57 Approaching with Humility and Love

20:01 Teaching Critical Thinking

30:13 Focusing on Your Own Feelings

30:53 Practicing Positive Thoughts

31:53 Teaching Critical Thinking Skills

33:02 Handling Emotional Outbursts

33:57 Encouraging Open Conversations

35:01 Using Feelings Lists

36:40 Avoiding Common Pitfalls

42:46 Understanding the Alienator's Mindset

45:14 Finding Compassion and Neutrality

53:07 Summarizing Key Points

56:43 Final Thoughts and Announcements