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Episode Summary:
In this episode of Turns Out I’m Into It, Harley Rabbit dives deep into the fascinating world of sexual fantasies, exploring why so many of us feel shame about them and how science challenges the idea of “normal” fantasies. Harley breaks down a landmark study, “What Exactly Is an Unusual Sexual Fantasy?”, which surveyed over 1,500 people to determine which fantasies are rare, unusual, common, or typical. Along the way, Harley shares personal insights, busts myths about fantasies, and offers practical tips for embracing your desires without shame.

Discussion & Journal Prompts:

1. What are some sexual fantasies I’ve had that I’ve felt shame about, and where does that shame come from?
2. How do I feel about sharing my fantasies with a partner? What fears or hesitations come up?

Links & Resources Mentioned:

• Full Study: “What Exactly Is an Unusual Sexual Fantasy?”
• Harley’s blog post summarizing the study and insights.
• Sci-Hub.se for accessing research articles.

Support the Podcast:
If you enjoyed this episode, please:

• Follow Turns Out I’m Into It on your favourite podcast platform.
• Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts—it’s quick, anonymous, and helps others discover the show.
• Share this episode with friends or partners who might find it valuable!

Connect with Harley Rabbit:

• FetLife: HarleyRabbit
• Website: harleyrabbit.com

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It’s time to add a little extra joy to your holiday season! In this special Christmas episode, I’m joined by the fabulous Wendy Setless, a Somatica-trained sexual health, pleasure, and relationship coach, and the resident sexologist at her local adult store.

Wendy brings her infectious enthusiasm and deep knowledge to help us navigate the world of adult toys—from vibrators and strokers to kegel balls and vibrating cock rings. Whether you’re looking to explore solo or spice things up with a partner, Wendy shares practical advice for finding the perfect “hardware” and discovering what makes your body tick.

This episode is packed with laughs, insights, and encouragement to embrace pleasure, own your desires, and have a very merry holiday season!

A video version of this episode is available on our Youtube channel. 

Mentioned in this episode:

• Wand Vibrator
• Bullet Vibrator
• Kegel Balls (How to use kegel balls)
• Asymmetrical Vibrator (couldn’t find exact model but this is close)
• Svockum (brand) 
• Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski
• The Rhythm of Women’s Desires by Elizabeth Davis

Contact 

• www.pillowtalkwithwendy.com
• @pillowtalkwithwendy Instagram / Facebook 
• Harleyrabbit.com 
• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow Harley on Fetlife
• Follow Harley on Instagram

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In this week’s episode, Harley Rabbit takes a deep dive into the world of sexual fantasies and reveals one of her most provocative ones—a cock worship scenario rooted in her submissive desires.

Harley discusses how fantasies can unlock deeper arousal, help you connect with your core desires, and transform your sex life—whether you're indulging solo or with a partner. She explores why fantasising is healthy, how it doesn’t reflect your real-life values, and how to incorporate your imagination into sex without needing an elaborate setup.

Plus, Harley shares practical tips on using props, positions, and gestures to amplify your fantasies and make them even more immersive.

Mentioned in this episode:

• FetLife Writing: Explore the full details of Harley’s cock worship fantasy on her FetLife profile @harleyrabbit 
• Kink Coaching: Want to uncover your core desires and craft your "hottest sexual movie"? Book a free connection call with Harley at HarleyRabbit.com.
• Episode #49: How to Give INSANE Blowjobs - Even If You Can’t Deep Throat

Contact 

• Harleyrabbit.com 
• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

Send us a text

In this episode of Turns Out I’m Into It, Harley Rabbit takes on some of the most stubborn myths and misconceptions about women’s sexuality. Whether you’re a woman navigating these expectations or a man eager to understand your partner better, this episode is for you.

Harley shares her personal experiences and insights from studying sexology, conversations with clients and friends, and challenges commonly held beliefs that might be holding you back from a more fulfilling sex life.

You’ll hear about:

• Why being multi-orgasmic isn’t the ultimate goal for everyone.
• Why “She Comes First” is well-intentioned but not always the best approach.
• How objectification, when done consensually, can actually boost confidence and connection.
• Why putting women on a pedestal creates imbalance and prevents authentic intimacy.

Contact 

• Harleyrabbit.com 
• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

Send us a text

In this empowering episode, Harley Rabbit dives into the topic of sex positivity and overcoming shame around sexuality. Sharing personal stories, including a formative memory from high school and a transformative recent experience in a burlesque dance class, Harley explores how societal messages shape our views on expressing sexuality. Harley reflects on reclaiming self-confidence and finding permission to be authentically sexy in a world that often discourages it.

Referenced in this episode

• Christina Agulara - Genie in a Bottle
• The Vavoom Room - Burlesque Dance Studio Townsville 
• HarleyRabbit.com – Book a free connection call.
• The Animal Game - Somatica® Exercise watch on Youtube

Contact 

• Harleyrabbit.com 
• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

Send us a text

In this episode, Harley Rabbit opens up about finally getting her first tattoo—a significant milestone that stirred up childhood memories and beliefs. Harley reflects on how her journey into kink and pain play has reshaped her understanding of resilience, pain, and bravery. Sharing stories about childhood fears, needle phobias, and reclaiming agency through kink, Harley discusses how these experiences helped overcome lifelong limiting beliefs.

Tune in for an honest, empowering discussion about using kink as a way to challenge old narratives, embrace your strength, and celebrate your journey. Plus, hear updates on Harley’s coaching journey, Somatica training, and her battles with challenges in the adult industry. 

Resources Mentioned:

• Book Recommendation: The Way Out by Alan Gordon for chronic pain management.
• HarleyRabbit.com – Book a free connection call.
• Find tattoo pictures on Harley’s Instagram and Fetlife profiles.

Contact 

• Harleyrabbit.com 
• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

Send us a text

In this episode, Harley dives into a fun yet insightful analysis of three popular love songs that might make you rethink your playlist: I Lose Control by Teddy Swims, Elastic Heart by Sia, and Grenade by Bruno Mars. Taking on the role of a relationship coach, Harley imagines these song lyrics as if they were clients sitting in a therapy session, sharing their romantic struggles.

Harley explores how these songs, while catchy and romantic on the surface, often glorify toxic behaviors that we’ve come to accept as ‘normal’ in love stories. From possessive jealousy and feeling out of control to shaming, blaming, and self-sacrifice, these songs highlight common patterns that are often romanticized in music but can be damaging in real relationships.

Tune in for a mix of humor, raw honesty, and relationship wisdom as Harley breaks down why we should pay closer attention to the messaging in the love songs we adore. You'll never hear these tracks the same way again! (Written by AI)

Mentioned in this Episode

• Loose Control - Teddy Swims
• Elastic Heart - Sia
• Grenade - Bruno Mars

Contact 

• Harleyrabbit.com 
• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

Send us a text

CNC (Consensual Non-Consent) is often discussed from a woman’s perspective, but what about men? In this episode, I’m joined by Dotch, a Somatica® practitioner who once saw CNC as a hard limit but has since learned to enjoy facilitating these fantasies. Dotch shares his journey, from initial discomfort to embracing CNC in a way that feels safe, consensual, and exciting. We discuss the challenges men face, including shame and the fear of crossing boundaries, and offer insights on how to explore CNC responsibly. Tune in for a thoughtful, candid conversation on navigating CNC from a man’s point of view.

Mentioned in this Episode

• Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)
• Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)
• Somatica®
• Somatica® BDSM Mastery Course
• Emily Tesh - Some Desperate Glory (book)

Contact 

• Sexandmischief.coach (Dotch’s website)
• Harleyrabbit.com (My website)
• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

Send us a text

In this episode, Harley Rabbit delves into attachment theory and its relevance to the kink community. The discussion covers the four main attachment styles: secure, avoidant, anxious, and disorganized, exploring how these styles affect relationships and personal dynamics. Harley emphasizes the importance of understanding these attachment styles to foster self-awareness and compassion, and discusses the potential for developing an earned secure attachment through personal growth and therapy. The episode concludes with an invitation to an upcoming workshop on consensual non-consent play (written by AI).

Mentioned in this Episode

• Book a Connection Call
• My Services 
• Polysecure - by Jessica Fern (book)
• Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)
• Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)

Contact 

• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram

Send us a text

In this episode, Harley Rabbit delves into the concept of intimacy within the kink and BDSM communities, challenging common misconceptions that equate kink with violence and degradation. Harley emphasizes that true intimacy in kink is built on trust, vulnerability, and open communication. The discussion explores various forms of intimacy that can arise in kink, including the exploration of personal limits and the importance of aftercare. Harley also shares personal experiences that highlight how kink can foster deeper connections and accelerate feelings of intimacy between partners.

If you are interested in exploring some CNC roleplays with a trusted partner, I am hosting an online workshop in October. You can get tickets here:

Beginner’s CNC Play for Couples Eventbrite (Book tickets)

Beginner's CNC Play for Couples (Fetlife Event)

Contact 

• Sign up to my Newsletter
• Follow me on Fetlife
• Follow me on Instagram
• Follow me on X