Turtle Time

By Riley Hamilton and Amy Scarlata

What's Turtle Time about?

It's Turtle Time! Tune in for dispatches from inside the Bravo universe from aficionados Amy and Riley. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Turtle Time episodes:

05.02.2024
Scary Scandoval Waters (Vanderpump Rules S11 E14, Summer House S8 E10, and The Valley S1 E7 Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Riley and Amy discuss the film Challengers, Something About Her officially opening, Vanderpump Rules being put on pause, Riley's wife being put on the witness stand to defend...
04.29.2024
Patreon Teaser: No Strings Attached (Vanderpump Rules S4 E10 Recap)
Amy and Riley discuss Vanderpump Rules season 4, episode 10 - "No Strings Attached" - in which Jax and Lala decide to flirt with each other to an almost unfathomable degree, and Tom Schwartz pulls off an elaborate proposal at Rock...
04.25.2024
Jax's Masterpiece (Vanderpump Rules S11 E13, The Valley S1 E6, and Summer House S8 E9 Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Riley discusses going Chili's to get the famous Katie Maloney and Scheana Shay Espresso Martinis, and the Something About Her opening. (00:00 - 22:33) And then they dive into...
04.22.2024
Patreon Teaser: What Happened in Vegas (Vanderpump Rules S4 E9 Recap)
Instead of cheating on their girlfriends in Vegas, Tom Schwartz and Tom Sandoval decide to get tattoos on their asses to honor their commitment to them. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to...
04.18.2024
Tequila Brittany (Vanderpump Rules S11 E12, The Valley S1 E5, Summer House S8 E8 Recap)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss all of the Real Housewives firings and dip into the Bravo Vault. (00:00 - 25:20) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump...
04.15.2024
Patreon Teaser: Dirty Thirty (Vanderpump Rules S4 E8 Recap)
Ariana wants to celebrate her 30th birthday weekend with the person she loves the most, but apparently there's like a huge construction yard in Vegas where you can like crush shit with bulldozers. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time...
04.11.2024
The Sad Story of Joseph and T-Money (Vanderpump Rules, Summer House, and The Valley Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss France, Notre Dame, Pirates of the Caribbean, the mid-season trailer of Summer House, and Jax and Brittany's faltering marriage. (00:00 - 32:31) And then they...
04.09.2024
Patreon Teaser: Spit Take (Vanderpump Rules S4 E7 Recap)
James Kennedy continues his reign of terror upon the Vanderpump Rules universe, and Lisa Vanderpump shares the wonders of SUR Restaurant with 12 homeless teens. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear...
04.05.2024
Brock's Big Day at the Beach (Vanderpump Rules S11 E10, The Valley S1 E3, and Vanderpump Villa Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Jeremy Madix getting engaged and Jax Taylor criticizing Vanderpump Rules. (00:00 - 42:05) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules (season...
04.02.2024
Patreon Teaser: Love Bites (Vanderpump Rules S4 E6 Recap)
Lisa Vanderpump planned two perfect parties for Gay Pride and she's expecting everything to run smoothly. But unbeknownst to her, James Kennedy is threatening to ruin everything by showing off all of the sexual-related bites he got after having sex...
03.29.2024
From Hubby to Wifey (Summer House S8 E6 Recap)
iI's a special episode, little turtle cuties. On this episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Vanderpump Villa (which airs Monday, April 1st on Hulu) and the latest beautiful episode of Summer House (Season 8 Episode 6) Start Your...
03.28.2024
The Disillusionment of Lala Kent (Vanderpump Rules S11 E9, The Valley S1 E2, and Summer House S8 E5 Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Chicago, Ariana Madix buying a $1.6M home near us, Candiace Dillard Bassett quitting Real Housewives of Potomac and even more than that. (00:00 -...
03.25.2024
Patreon Teaser: Cock of the Walk (Vanderpump Rules S4 E5 Recap)
Jax Taylor always considered himself the cock of the walk, but there's a new rooster in town - James Kennedy - that is constantly ruffling his feathers. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP...
03.20.2024
Jax Taylor Reborn! (Vanderpump Rules S11 E8 and The Valley Premiere)
It's Turtle Time After Dark, little turtle cuties! Amy and Riley stayed up late and discussed the latest episode of Vanderpump Rules (season 11 episode 8) and the premiere episode of The Valley. If you enjoyed this episode, join the ⁠Turtle...
03.18.2024
Patreon Teaser: Happily Never After (Vanderpump Rules S4 E4 Recap)
Amy and Riley overcame the Ides of March to bring you this very special recap of Vanderpump Rules. In this episode, Scheana hosts an intervention for her husband, Shay, and also James has a breakthrough in his couples' therapy session...
03.15.2024
Old Carl Burns Down The House (Summer House S8 E4 Recap)
It's a special emegency episode, little turtle cuties. Amy and Riley discuss Summer House season 8 episode 4 and what it means for the future of Lindsay and Carl. If you enjoyed this episode (which we know is probably not the...
03.14.2024
The Many Gifts of Tom Sandoval (Vanderpump Rules S11 E7 and Summer House S8 E3 Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties. On this week's episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss the Oscars, The Valley trailer, Kate Middleton, Rachel Goes Rogue, and Kristen Doute saying she got thousands of dollars from Tom Sandoval on Paypal....
03.12.2024
Patreon Teaser: Pretty Little Lies (Vanderpump Rules S4 E3 Recap)
Scheana Shay lets her friends and Lisa know that she is experiencing some difficult issues in her marriage. But once those issues come to light, will Lisa still be able to start a rivalry between her SUR employees and her...
03.07.2024
Scheana Shay Has Lost Her Way (Vanderpump Rules S11 E6 Recap)
Amy and Riley unfortunately had a lot of issues recording remotely this week so the episode quality suffered tremendously. We almost didn't want to put this out, but we thought some Little Turtle Cuties might derive some ironic enjoyment out...
03.04.2024
Patreon Teaser: New Blood (Vanderpump Rules S4 E2 Recap)
Amy and Riley discuss a haunting scene where Tom and Ariana buy a new couch together. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive bonus content!...
03.02.2024
Hubb House of Horrors (Summer House and RHOBH Reunion Part 1 Recaps)
There's breaking news, little turtle cuties. On this episode of Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Jax and Brittany's separation and the lawsuit Rachel Leviss has filed against Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix. (00:00 - 38:38) And then they dive into...
02.29.2024
Saving Mr. Banks (Vanderpump Rules, Summer House, and Beverly Hills Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss the latest allegations against Andy Cohen and Bravo as well as the new trailer for The Valley. (00:00 - 44:11) And then they dive into the latest...
02.26.2024
Patreon Teaser: Playtime's Over (Vanderpump Rules S4 E1 Recap)
This season of Vanderpump Rules has everything you could ever want. Lala is here! Brittany has come! Jax's Mom visits! There is so much power in VPR season 4, and Amy and Riley are ready to harness it all. So...
02.22.2024
The Most Hated Man in America (Vanderpump Rules S11 E4 Recap)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Tom Sandoval's New York Times profile and Rachel Leviss' latest episode of her podcast. (00:00 - 32:23) And then they dive into the latest episode of Vanderpump...
02.20.2024
Patreon Teaser: Turtle Talk - Episode 1
Amy and Riley are proud to present our first episode of Turtle Talk, in which we answer questions from our Little Turtle Cuties and Villa Rosa VIPs. We answered many of your most burning questions and hopefully provided moments of...
02.15.2024
Scheana Shay Goes Y2K (Vanderpump Rules S11 E3 Recap)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss bindles, H**o code, Porsha Williams returning to RHOA, Winter House on pause, and the latest Summer House news. (00:00 - 42:12) And then they dive into the...
02.12.2024
Patreon Teaser: Vanderpump Rules Season 3 Reunion Part 1 + 2 Recap
Amy and Riley discuss the powerful season 3 reunion and officially say goodbye to one of the best Vanderpump Rules seasons of all time. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the...
02.08.2024
The Return of Tom Sandoval (Vanderpump Rules S11 E2 Recap)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss the RHONY casting rumors, Kandi leaving RHOA, the Grammy's, and then Riley reads part 3 of The Reality of a Scandal. (00:00 - 01:05:15) And then they...
02.01.2024
The Descent of Lala Kent (Vanderpump Rules Season 11 Premiere Recap)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Tom Sandoval and Tom Schwartz on Nick Viall's podcast and Rachel Goes Rogue Chapter 5. And then Riley reads Part 2 of The Reality of a...
01.29.2024
Patreon Teaser: Dethroned (Vanderpump Rules S3 E18 Recap)
It's the Vanderpump Rules season 3 finale! In this episode, Lisa Vanderpump gathers all of her friends and employees to celebrate SUR's 10 year anniversary. Unbeknownst to her, the Vanderpump Rules cast members use this as an opportunity to discuss...
01.26.2024
The Troll of Salt Lake (Southern Charm, RHOSLC, and RHOBH Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss the Scandoval Lifetime movie they're writing, the Oscars, Paul Giamatti, Stassi Schroeder declining to be on The Valley, and even more than that. (00:00 - 00:50:44) And...
01.22.2024
Patreon Teaser: Jax Cracks (Vanderpump Rules S3 E17 Recap)
Jax Taylor finally unburdens his heavy soul and reveals to his friends that Tom Sandoval made love to Miami Girl. But when Scheana hears the truth, will she truly listen? If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a...
01.19.2024
Shep's Rose and Shep's Thorn (Southern Charm, RHOSLC, and RHOBH Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss the Vanderpump Rules season 11 premiere, Rachel Goes Rouge episode 2, The Valley trailer, the Kory and Sam break-up, and much more! (00:00 - 01:17:00) And then...
01.15.2024
Patreon Teaser: Ring on a String (Vanderpump Rules S3 E16 Recap)
Scheana's wedding fills the air with so much love that Tom Schwartz decides to give Katie a ring on a string. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and...
01.12.2024
The Rot of RadHouse (RHOSLC S4 Reunion Part 1 , RHOBH, and Southern Charm S9 Finale Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss the Summer House season 8 trailer, Rachel Goes Rouge, the film Poor Things, the Golden Globes, and much more. (00:00 - 59:27) And then they dive into...
01.08.2024
Patreon Teaser: For Better or Worse (Vanderpump Rules S3 E15 Recap)
Scheana and Shay decide to finally get married to each other and they have gathered all of their friends to celebrate. But if Lisa Vanderpump and all of her staff are at their wedding, who will be working at SUR? If...
01.05.2024
The Unmasking of Monica (RHOSLC, RHOBH, and Southern Charm Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Gypsy Rose Blanchard being Stassi Schroeder's cousin, Lisa Vanderpump's new show, Vanderpump Villa, Tom Sandoval taking a photo with a tiger in Thailand, and much more!...
01.03.2024
Patreon Teaser: Judgement Day (Vanderpump Rules S3 E14 Recap)
Amy and Riley are ringing in the new year by recapping "Judgement Day". In this episode, Lisa has a sit down with Kristen Doute and decides her fate as a waiter at Sur. But will Kristen Doute let all old...
12.25.2023
Patreon Teaser: Miami Vices (Vanderpump Rules S3 E13 Recap)
Happy holidays, our little turtle cuties. On this special day, Amy and Riley recap the "Miami Girl" episode of Vanderpump Rules and watch in horror as Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix lie through their teeth about every aspect of the...
12.22.2023
The Last House of Winter (Winter House Season 3 Finale and Reunion Recap)
Happy holidays, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Patricia Altschul, Olivia Flowers, Elvis, January 6th, and much more! And then, they dive into the Winter House season finale and reunion. If you enjoyed this episode...
12.20.2023
The Legacy of RHONY (Southern Charm and Ultimate Girls Trip: RHONY Legacy)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Riley's trip to Schwartz and Sandy's and Jax's Studio City as well as the new details surrounding Scheana Shay and Tom Schwartz' mysterious kiss. (00:00 -...
12.18.2023
Patreon Teaser: A Stand Against Stassi (Vanderpump Rules S3 E12 Recap)
A house divided cannot stand and either can a restaurant. Even one as powerful as SUR. In this episode, Stassi isolates herself even further from the Vanderpump Rules cast when she loses the last friend she had left... And also...
12.15.2023
Three Hours of Rumors and Lies (Southern Charm, RHOSLC, RHOBH, and Winter House Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Vanderpump Rules: A Decade of Rumors and Lies, the sneak peeks of Vanderpump Rules season 11, and Kim and Kroy Biermann's police body cam footage. (00:00...
12.13.2023
Turtle Time Breaking News: Vanderpump Rules Season 11 Trailer Discussion
It's a Turtle Time Breaking News Report! Amy and Riley exhaustively discuss every aspect of the Vanderpump Rules season 11 trailer and officially enter the new Vanderpump Rules era. If you enjoyed this episode but you demand more, join the ⁠Turtle Time...
12.11.2023
Patreon Teaser: Tears Over Miami (Vanderpump Rules S3 E11 Recap)
When Kristen Doute wishes death upon Ariana Madix, Tom Sandoval must do everything within in his power to stop it. Even if that means letting tears pour all over Miami... If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a...
12.08.2023
Kyle and Her Sisters (RHOSLC, RHOBH, and Winter House Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Alexis Bellino and John Janssen dating, Ariana Madix on Dancing with the Stars, and the start of a new Roxie Hart. (00:00 - 35:48) And then dive...
12.04.2023
Patreon Teaser: Bachelorette Beach Party (Vanderpump Rules S3 E10 Recap)
When a manager at Pump quits, Lisa must do the unthinkable - hire her daughter, Pandora, for a day. But will Pump ever recover from the loss? If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to...
12.01.2023
Amy and Riley and Rachel Leviss Go Rogue (RHOSLC, RHOBH, and Winter House Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Tom Sandoval on Special Forces, Ariana Madix on Dancing with the Stars, NeNe Leakes distancing herself from the Reality Reckoning, and much more! (00:00 - 48:00) Then...
11.27.2023
Patreon Teaser: What Happens in San Diego... (Vanderpump Rules S3 E9 Recap)
What happens in San Diego... could ultimately wreak havoc upon Lisa Vanderpump's restaurant empire and leave it in ruins. If you enjoyed this teaser, join the Turtle Time Patreon and become a Villa Rosa VIP to hear the full episode and access exclusive...
11.24.2023
Tom Schwartz Is Out of Sorts (Southern Charm, RHOSLC, RHOP, and Winter House Recaps)
Welcome back, little turtle cuties! On this week's Turtle Time, Amy and Riley discuss Leonardo DiCaprio owning a huge tortoise and that's why he dates younger women so that they can take care of it after he dies. (00:00 -...

What's Turtle Time about?

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Turtle Time episodes:

Scary Scandoval Waters (Vanderpump Rules S11 E14, Summer House S8 E10, and The Valley S1 E7 Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: No Strings Attached (Vanderpump Rules S4 E10 Recap)

Jax's Masterpiece (Vanderpump Rules S11 E13, The Valley S1 E6, and Summer House S8 E9 Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: What Happened in Vegas (Vanderpump Rules S4 E9 Recap)

Tequila Brittany (Vanderpump Rules S11 E12, The Valley S1 E5, Summer House S8 E8 Recap)

Patreon Teaser: Dirty Thirty (Vanderpump Rules S4 E8 Recap)

The Sad Story of Joseph and T-Money (Vanderpump Rules, Summer House, and The Valley Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Spit Take (Vanderpump Rules S4 E7 Recap)

Brock's Big Day at the Beach (Vanderpump Rules S11 E10, The Valley S1 E3, and Vanderpump Villa Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Love Bites (Vanderpump Rules S4 E6 Recap)

From Hubby to Wifey (Summer House S8 E6 Recap)

The Disillusionment of Lala Kent (Vanderpump Rules S11 E9, The Valley S1 E2, and Summer House S8 E5 Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Cock of the Walk (Vanderpump Rules S4 E5 Recap)

Jax Taylor Reborn! (Vanderpump Rules S11 E8 and The Valley Premiere)

Patreon Teaser: Happily Never After (Vanderpump Rules S4 E4 Recap)

Old Carl Burns Down The House (Summer House S8 E4 Recap)

The Many Gifts of Tom Sandoval (Vanderpump Rules S11 E7 and Summer House S8 E3 Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Pretty Little Lies (Vanderpump Rules S4 E3 Recap)

Scheana Shay Has Lost Her Way (Vanderpump Rules S11 E6 Recap)

Patreon Teaser: New Blood (Vanderpump Rules S4 E2 Recap)

Hubb House of Horrors (Summer House and RHOBH Reunion Part 1 Recaps)

Saving Mr. Banks (Vanderpump Rules, Summer House, and Beverly Hills Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Playtime's Over (Vanderpump Rules S4 E1 Recap)

The Most Hated Man in America (Vanderpump Rules S11 E4 Recap)

Patreon Teaser: Turtle Talk - Episode 1

Scheana Shay Goes Y2K (Vanderpump Rules S11 E3 Recap)

Patreon Teaser: Vanderpump Rules Season 3 Reunion Part 1 + 2 Recap

The Return of Tom Sandoval (Vanderpump Rules S11 E2 Recap)

The Descent of Lala Kent (Vanderpump Rules Season 11 Premiere Recap)

Patreon Teaser: Dethroned (Vanderpump Rules S3 E18 Recap)

The Troll of Salt Lake (Southern Charm, RHOSLC, and RHOBH Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Jax Cracks (Vanderpump Rules S3 E17 Recap)

Shep's Rose and Shep's Thorn (Southern Charm, RHOSLC, and RHOBH Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Ring on a String (Vanderpump Rules S3 E16 Recap)

The Rot of RadHouse (RHOSLC S4 Reunion Part 1 , RHOBH, and Southern Charm S9 Finale Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: For Better or Worse (Vanderpump Rules S3 E15 Recap)

The Unmasking of Monica (RHOSLC, RHOBH, and Southern Charm Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Judgement Day (Vanderpump Rules S3 E14 Recap)

Patreon Teaser: Miami Vices (Vanderpump Rules S3 E13 Recap)

The Last House of Winter (Winter House Season 3 Finale and Reunion Recap)

The Legacy of RHONY (Southern Charm and Ultimate Girls Trip: RHONY Legacy)

Patreon Teaser: A Stand Against Stassi (Vanderpump Rules S3 E12 Recap)

Three Hours of Rumors and Lies (Southern Charm, RHOSLC, RHOBH, and Winter House Recaps)

Turtle Time Breaking News: Vanderpump Rules Season 11 Trailer Discussion

Patreon Teaser: Tears Over Miami (Vanderpump Rules S3 E11 Recap)

Kyle and Her Sisters (RHOSLC, RHOBH, and Winter House Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: Bachelorette Beach Party (Vanderpump Rules S3 E10 Recap)

Amy and Riley and Rachel Leviss Go Rogue (RHOSLC, RHOBH, and Winter House Recaps)

Patreon Teaser: What Happens in San Diego... (Vanderpump Rules S3 E9 Recap)

Tom Schwartz Is Out of Sorts (Southern Charm, RHOSLC, RHOP, and Winter House Recaps)