Two Drink Minimum Commentaries

Are you ready for high adventure!?  The TDM crew watched and enjoyed this bootleg Conan film brought to you by the guy who brought you Cannibal Holocaust. When two brothers are forced into slavery by a very fashionable Richard Lynch, they grow into massive brutes who break their chains and laugh and lift their way into adventures and women. Can they stop the sorcerer who killed their whole tribe all while getting past Michael Berryman’s erect horn? Find out all this and more in The Barbarians!

They’re back! It’s the green machine. Gonna hit the streets without being seen. Quick question. Have you ever seen a turtle get down?  We did as we watched this childhood fave of mine. Join our intrepid heroes as they search for the culprits behind their mutation, take on The Shredder and his baby creatures and go clubbing with Vanilla Ice. All this and David Warner loving pepperoni. We are doing this with a purpose though. One of the stars, and one cool dude, Ernie Reyes Jr. is having some health problems. He needs a push for his gofundme campaign for his kidney surgery. If you download this and you feel like helping out, click the link below.

http://www.gofundme.com/ErnieReyesJr-Fund

Thanks for downloading and hopefully helping out.

There’s trouble brewing again at Hamilton High.  Kids are disapearing.  Phantom jukeboxes keep showing up. Not to mention, ghost stds are on the rise.  You get all this and a bunch of wacky death in Prom Night 3 : The Last Kiss.  After Mary Lou Maloney breaks out of hell, she is hungry for love and she finds it in poor hapless Alex. After some bumping and grinding and heavy petting, Mary Lou decides that Alex is the one for her, by any means necessary.  There’s some great cheese in this uncut version of this awkwardly Canadian film.  So pick your tux, grab your favorite lady and hope that you can survive.

What drives a man to wearing trenchcoats on the reg?  What can possibly make a guy this angry?  Where is he getting all the fat suits and voice changers?  You get all this and more in Sam Raimi’s action classic, Darkman!  When Dr. Peyton Westlake explodes in his lab in a coux perpetrated by a cigar smoking, finger collecting baddie known as Durant,  he is presumed dead.  What they don’t know is that his badly burned body is now impervious to pain and he has a massive anger complex.  It’s up to him to take down the baddies, save his girl and somehow make those crazy face masks last a bit longer.  Is he a bootleg Batman? Were green screen effects back in the day that bad? Are those carnival games really rigged?  He is the night!  He is Darkman!  or something like that…….

The TDM Crew is back.   We have abandoned our dogs and short hair for skunk mullets and pig slop!  Join Max, Auntie, Master Blaster and all those damn kids when we depart on the final chapter of the original saga.  So step in the dome and join or biggest cast in a while that includes the return of the dulcet tones of Mr. Ryan Lewis!

Welcome to part two of the Angry Antipodean saga.  When a new group of motorized psychos terrorize the desert wasteland, it’s up to our hero and his dog to lead the charge with a pack of hippies in a war over petrol!  All this and more in this very leathery episode.

Rev up your engine and hit the highway with Max and the TDM crew!  This is our first retropective and i’m sure it’s not gonna be our last.  With Fury Road looming we decided to do the whole Angry Antipodean saga.  Max is the best highway cop there is.  When a new group of toughs ravage his jurisdiction, he risks friends, autos and even family to get revenge.  Buckle up!

Holy copyright laws, Batman!  Come and join me and my meery band of boy wonders as we have a chat through and oggle Lee Meriwether in Batman ’66.  You get the whole rogues gallery in this one in which Bats and the boy wonder try to stop them  from stealing all the world’s leaders.  All this and bombs, sharks, seductive russians and burly sailors.  Good thing they have lots of vehicles!

Welcome to a wonderful world where the villages and scenery is beautiful but there is another layer.  An underbelly if you will.  This is a world of racism, baby killers, fairies, witches, beards and all the sex dust you can handle.  This is just a day in the life of Silo Ufgood.  Come and join him as he encounters hairy rat wolves, condescending little people. wrathful witches, cross dressing swordsmen in his quest to return a super baby to a rat sorceress.  Come for the minor adventure and magic, stay for the racism and little person cock jokes.

Is your T.V. on the fritz?  What are you gonna do?  Call Horace Pinker!  He’s slashing prices and throats all over town!  That’s right!  We watched Wes Craven’s body swapping, electrified classic Shocker! When local mass murderer Horace Pinker is executed, he picks up such abilities  as swapping bodies by touch and going on a killing spree right through the airwaves.  It’s gonna take crafty clairvoyant Peter Berg to stop him.  But who’s gonna start the football game Friday night?!  All this and more on this edition of Two Drink Minimum Commentaries