Two Open Doors

The central theme of Two Open Doors is the miracle and mystery of deep human connection, which is the possibility of two human beings intertwining their lives on the planes of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual reality.  Though few (or none) of us are able to consistently sustain such intimate connection, we’ve all tasted at least occasional smatterings of that richness.  Such times are memorable.

In this episode, we’ll consider the complex and convoluted question of whether such deep connection is possible with more than one partner.  That is, we’ll entertain the question of whether deep connection is compatible with polyamory, or having “many loves”.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

A desire for connection is deeply wired into the DNA of being human.  As a very social species, we humans rely on one another for support and satisfaction; people are interdependent.

In this episode, we’ll take a look at what benefits relationship offers us, on three separate planes:  physical, mental and emotional.  Different kinds of relationships offer a different mix of benefits, on each of these planes.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

What do you think of, when you hear the term “soulmates”?  Do you envision that old couple who walk down the street each afternoon, hand-in-hand?  Do you see a pair of partners who seem to read each other’s thoughts, with little or no audible speech?  Do you recognize soulmates by some indescribable look in their eyes as they connect, a look that seems to say “forever”?

In this episode, we’ll take a look at the notion of soulmates, we’ll consider what it takes to be soulmates with someone, and we’ll think about whether we might want to seek out a soulmate for ourselves.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

In a number of prior episodes, we’ve explored the notion of a relationship hierarchy, considering the many ways in which relationships can differ, as well as the ways in which we decide what we seek from each relationship, and the ways and extent to which we invest ourselves in each relationship.

In this episode, we’ll take a look at the possibility of our having “primary” relationships, and we’ll consider the things that might make such relationships very special.  We’ll also consider the process through which such relationships might emerge.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

As embodied organisms, we experience pleasure as one of the most prominent guiding forces in our lives.  In our Puritanical society, pleasure often is looked down upon as an unworthy source of motivation and guidance for living a productive and meaningful life.  The physical reality, though, is that we are “wired” to be motivated by pleasure (and by the avoidance of pain).

In this episode, we’ll consider that there are two different categories of pleasure: “hedonic”, and “eudaimonic”.  We’ll consider how intimate relationships can be a rich source of both kinds of pleasure.  We’ll also explore how to give pleasure its proper place in our deep human connections.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

In several recent episodes, we’ve taken a look at the roles of commitment in intimate relationships.  We’ve seen that the process of commitment arises naturally in the course of deepening of a relationship.

Commitment involves making choices and staying true to those choices.  In this episode, we’ll consider how we can responsibly manage our relationships, so as to reinforce the trust that our partners place in our commitments.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

In choosing who we wish to establish a deeply-connected relationship with, one of the things we should consider is what we want from the prospective relationship--- that is, our relationship goals.  That important consideration is often ignored or downplayed in many new relationships, due in part to the temporary “blindness” that can come from New Relationship Energy (NRE).

In this episode, we’ll consider some of the possible goals that we may set for a relationship.  We’ll also explore the importance of having good goal-alignment between the two partners in a relationship.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

Love lies at the heart of all intimate connections--- whether those connections are physical, emotional, mental or spiritual, or any combination of those.  Despite that essential nature, though, it’s hard to define what love really is.

Psychologist Robert Sternberg offers a “triangular” theory of love, which I think goes far toward capturing the elemental ingredients of love.  We’ll explore that fruitful theory, in this episode.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

In our previous episode, we revisited the nature and role of commitment in deeply-connected relationships, and we then focused on the benefits and costs of uncommitted relationships.  In this episode, we’ll drop the other shoe, and look at the benefits and costs of committed relationships.  Taken together, this and the previous episode will give us what we need in order to make more-informed choices in each of our significant relationships.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/

Suppose you’ve had the good fortune of meeting someone you’re strongly drawn to, and with whom you’d like to establish a connection.  You’ve spent some time together, enough to start to get to know one another fairly well--- and the magic of initial attraction seems to still be there.  Where do you go from here?

Relationships evolve, as we’ve noted in prior episodes.  Even if one doesn’t follow the sequence of relationship phases defined in the socially-prescribed “relationship escalator”, satisfying and meaningful relationships do tend to deepen.  In this episode, we’ll re-examine the notion of commitment, and we’ll consider both the benefits and the costs associated with uncommitted relationships.  In the following episode, we’ll put committed relationships through the same process.

Dr. Claude Cruz is a relationship and intimacy coach based in the Portland, OR area. He holds a PhD in Human Sexuality from the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality (IASHS), as well as a Professional Sex Coach certification from Sex Coach U. Dr. Claude is passionate about promoting and supporting deep human connection. He develops and delivers workshops and other events regarding that topic, as well as being available for individual and couples intimacy coaching. He can be contacted at [email protected].

This weekly podcast is distributed through multiple podcast directories, including:
* Apple podcasts: 1588173033 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/two-open-doors/id1588173033
* Google podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/search/two%20open%20doors
* Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/two-open-doors
* Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ib3hb9vsNoNvWM3HWpEXL
* iHeart Radio: · https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-two-open-doors-86831925/