Unclassical

We're back baby! And to help us transition from this horrible winter into the warmer months, we're bringing you The Secret Garden - like only Unclassical can tell it!

If you grew up watching the 90s film - get ready to hear the darker themes the film missed out, and if you didn't grow up on 90s film adaptations, well watch them! All of them! You're welcome!

But for now, sit back, stare forlornly out of a window, and get ready for an apocalypse that only a tyrannical little pig could survive.

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Ho ho… huh?We are diving into the festive, idealist world of Christmas with Enid Blyton! But is it as perfect as you'd think? Recognise familiar themes of bubbling resentment, parental favouritism and a constant reminder that a woman's place is rearing children and in the kitchen!

Good? Good.

There's actually quite a lot of history and cocoa too!

So get a blanket, snuggle in, and may our rage at the patriarchy keep you warm!

Merry Christmas, guys!

This week, we return to The Crucible and somehow manage to hate John Proctor even more—which we didn’t think was humanly possible, but here we are. We also dive into the very important logistical question: if both parents are in prison for witchcraft, which parent should organise the childcare? Plus, we unveil a new theory about one characters’ secret motivations...

Grab your broomstick, light your candles (responsibly), and prepare for another round of literary chaos, moral panic (that makes no sense), and aggressive side-eye!

We'll now be taking a short break, before we return with our Christmas season!!! So excited!

John’s dragging Mary Warren to court to expose Abby for the chaos gremlin she is — but Salem’s her playground, and tbh, John is too dumb to stand a chance. Cue courtroom meltdowns, mass hysteria, and John threatening to beat children every two minutes. Elizabeth deserved so much better...

Justice? Never heard of her.

Things are heating up in Salem faster than a witch at the stake. This week, we return to John and Elizabeth Proctor, as they try (and fail) to have a normal conversation without making us want to cause John much pain. Mary Warren returns from court with gossip hotter than Tituba’s cauldron, and let’s just say... it’s not looking great for the wives of Salem... or women in general... or vulnerable people... or anyone who's ever had a nice pig... actually, I think it's fair to say everyone's getting mirked.

Meanwhile, the consequences of John’s “little mistakes” (spoiler: not so little) begin to snowball, dragging everyone else down with him. Love! Lies! The 10 Commandments! It's all here, and it's a mess.

Join us for our next instalment where Hale Arrives & the Proctor Tea Spills.
Reverend Hale finally struts into Salem ready to sniff out some witches, and things get messy. We learn more about what the girlies were actually up to in the woods (spoiler: it’s not just a cheeky little dance), and tensions start simmering over at the Proctor household. John’s got secrets, Elizabeth’s got suspicions, and the tea? It’s bitter.

Episode 2 of Unclassical’s The Crucible series is here!

This week, the drama hits a new level. We learn why you do not mess with the girls (seriously, they run Salem), and finally get the real story behind Goody Proctor and Abby’s beef — and ohhh it is JUICY. 🍵👀

Also… how many people can you squeeze into Betty’s bedroom?! We have got to be sitting on laps by now! 😂

Betrayals, gossip, witchy side-eyes — this is The Crucible like you’ve never heard it before.

And who else is vibing Mercy? We LOVE her!

#UnclassicalPodcast #TheCrucible #PodcastDrama #SalemSpice #AbbyVsProctor #WitchPlease #LiteratureUnhinged

New Series!

It’s officially spooky season, and we are are diving broom-first into something a little... witchy🧹✨

Our brand new series is here, and we're kicking things off with The Crucible – drama, paranoia, betrayal, and just a touch of Puritanical panic. Standard October vibes, right?

So grab your cosiest blanket, light that pumpkin spice candle, and settle in with your favourite witches (us, obviously) as we unpack Arthur Miller’s iconic play like never before.

Expect sass, side-eyes, and some Puritanical roof raising!

Listen now and let us know, is Betty - hangover hanging, or heading for a witch trial hanging?

And who low key wants to party with Tituba and the girls? Me please!

#UnclassicalPodcast #TheCrucible #SpookySeasonVibes #WitchyReads #PumpkinSpiceAndDrama

It's here the final instalment and Marsha did not see that ending coming!

Generally, we confirm that the bar for men, as ever, is on the floor. You can have a fun conversation starter for this week - would you still be alive if you were a Victorian? And have Rachel and Philick employed the WORST landscape gardeners ever?!

Apologies is the sound is a bit erratic, tell Katy to talk louder!

We'll be back in a couple of weeks, kicking off the 'ber months with THE CRUCIBLE!

So excited!

Guys, strap in, strap on - just strap something, because wow! Things have amped up with Philip and Rachel, crossed wires, mixed signals and so much ick and cringe! I don't even know what to say, just tune in, find a wooden spoon to bite down on and we'll see you at the end!