Legends tell of a set of introductory chapters so normal, so bogstandard, so boringly unremarkable that all the lesbian hosts of a 2021 Rick Riordan book podcast will be able to say in response to it is: "Yeah, I mean, it's fine? Pretty good." Today, that oddly specific legend has been fulfilled, and the Unwise Girls struggle to keep their heads on straight in the land of perfunctory decentness. On the surface, this may seem like a regular episode of the show, with minor criticism of the ways the book talks about race, light appreciation for the cool labyrinth and interesting new characters, brief confusion about theogony, and Jacqueline struggling to not rant about Wiccans, but under the surface... something darker is boiling. Grab your dragons, Whovians.