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Ep45 Generativity…Really?

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: What is Generativity and How can it help us?

So…Generativity means that a person has concern for and belief in the future. People with a high degree of generativity have reached a point in their lives where they take on actions, behaviors, mindset which promotes goals and direction towards a better future.

The person has an appreciation for possibility. Looking for and implementing positive stepping stones for a bigger and better future for themselves, others, mankind, animals, plants, the planet. No matter how bad things may be at any given moment, you can persevere and redeem yourself.

Highly generative people are driven to help others for the betterment of the future. They might choose professions where this type of behavior is natural, healthcare, education, protectors of peace. Or, they are people who simply implement those behaviors into any job or situation they may be in.

These people see their lives as redemption stories. Its not necessarily about personal redemption but realizing that as a whole the future can always be made better. Their lives become the hero’s journey, as Joseph Campbell said.

In psychology, Erik Erikson’s model of psychosocial development, established the idea of generativity as being the polarity of middle age. Generativity or doing positive things for a better future is opposed by stagnation which means what it says, doing nothing and simply marking time. A healthy outcome of this is to do what one can to ensure a better future.

Some people are highly generative while others might be slightly generative, in either case, the person is still generative which means forward positive moving energy.

The difficulty with generativity is when the individual runs into barriers that don’t allow for betterment. For example a person puts a ton of effort and time into a community project that simply does not manifest. Should that person give up? Of course not. Each day is a new day and maybe its simply a matter of course correction as to where to put their time and effort.

Let’s take a look at the neuroscience. On a simple level, the story goes like this. When you do something kind, or positive, the brain in response to that action secretes neurotransmitters that make you feel good. They can make you feel happy and satisfied. The regeneration or renewal pattern is that because it made you feel good you end up wanting more of those feelings so you do more generative behaviors and actions and slowly your baseline outlook rises and you feel overall better about things. You create a more positive outlook for your own future and of course for others.

Time to apply this to the Emotional Warrior. Heart based resilience means that not only is the brain between your ears but your second brain, which is in the heart, becomes more activated and engaged. Practicing heart based breathing and gratitude, creating a personal philosophy of altruism and positivity set the tone for a beautiful life. There really is no need to convince anyone else of this for momentum to begin to rally. Simply work on yourself and your personality will inspire others to join you.

It is truly a wonderful thing when you think about it. We spend our early years as part of our parents’ world, then move into making a place for ourselves in society and the world and then we get to help out others. Our physical, emotional and spiritual systems are designed for this. We are meant to be altruistic and we are meant to improve life on this planet for future generations. This sounds like a phenomenal purpose to be a part of.

~Peace

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Ep44 Select This…Attention

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Can selective attention help us to find inner peace?

In this episode I would like to take a closer look at how learning to ignore things can be the fastest way to achieve inner peace.

In previous episodes I have tried to point out how removing interferences, sort of like peeling away the layers of an onion, allows to live a cleaner and healthier life. I do want to share some foundational assumptions about this path. By clean and healthy, what I mean is the way a human being can live a life on this earth. One that is sustainable, happy, giving, filled with gratitude and love. Removing interferences means to get rid of negative emotions, energies and frequencies that take up tremendous amounts of time to correct while in the meantime cause one to miss valuable quality of life experiences.

I mean, we don’t know how long we have to live and somehow due to experiences by those ahead of us and around us we believe to have on average around 80 years. So why, if you know this, are we so eager to give away any of our precious time? Why we do this, I would like to save for another conversation. Today, I would like to focus in on the idea of removing interferences , specifically by using something we possess quite naturally, called selective attention.

How often have you looked at your phone while someone is trying to talk with you. You think you can pay attention to both but in the end the phone wins and you miss out on the immediate conversation. The phone wins because of something called visual capture. Visione is such a dominant sense that it takes over as the top priority while hearing/listenting takes a back seat.

So what is selective attention? According to John Spacey, there are 9 types of selective attention: selective auditory processing, selective listening, selective visual attention, covert attention, automaticity, divided attention, sensory distraction, situational awareness, sensory overload. All of these are examples of selective attention which is the human ability to filter sensory information to focus attention.

The neuroscience: in an article by Harold Schupp in the Journal of Neuroscience, his team found that negative stimuli ie: mutilation had the added emotional component added to attention. Showing that how incoming information is encoded and processed in the brain is not only based on emotion but amplified by the concurrent emotional experience.

As I have said in prior episodes, our brain spends the bulk of its efforts keeping us alive, meaning survival based activity. The neuroscience shows that we pay attention to that which is negative or harmful quicker and amplify that experience with emotions if we think our survival is threatened.

Now, the emotional warrior…how can use this information? Selective attention can help us to filter out negative stimuli. Since we already have the power of selective attention, lets use it four our own gain. Pay attention to what matters to your own personal growth and fulfilment. Much of the work and emotional warrior has to do is priming of thought. We have to take charge of our thinking. Of course bad things can and often do happen every day. But with the small steps philosophy of kaizen, you can choose the context for your thoughts.

Ex: You wake up and before anything comes into your mind, actively or selectively do a mental gratitude list of your life. Such as: I am happy and grateful for my life, my health, the love of my life, my mindset, the abundance flowing my way etc…

This sets into motion which thoughts of the millions around you get called into your awareness. Maybe you begin to notice small seemingly miraculous events and situations right in your immediate vicinity. No need to worry, the negative stuff is always right there, waiting, but it is your right and apparent hard...

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Ep43 Do We Really Believe in Our Own Limitations

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Do we really believe in our own limitations?

How often do you find yourself having a great idea, at least it is one in your mind. The lightbulb goes off and you are convinced that you have found the answer that will fix some sort of major problem. But immediately, the loop of negativity begins to play. You hear the voices of all the nay-sayers, including your own. Oh there are so many obstacles that I have to conquer, so many steps, so many reasons to fail!! Crazy right? Why do we do this? Spirit, Source, God, whatever you want to call it, sends a great idea your way, only for your brain and ego to shoot it down before it can ever take hold and become something real.

On one hand, we have the lizard brain or survival brain. Its job is to keep us safe. If you really let it do its best it will guide you to live in a tiny corner in a small room and even there be worried about surviving. Isn’t it interesting that this is what we call survival? Absolute zero quality of life. So we have to take what this part of the brain tells us, evaluate the dangers, but in the end make more logical decisions.

This means that we have to use our higher/reasoning part of the brain. While this may seems obvious, why don’t we do it more naturally? The answer is habit. We think between 60 thousand to 70 thousand thoughts per day and 90-95% of those thoughts are the same, day in day out. The room for a novel thought in one’s mind is quite slim.

Is there anything we can do to help us with this?

Enter the mindset of an emotional warrior. Emotional Warriors believe in possibilities. The repetitive mind lives within the confines of limitations. If every day is the same old same old, then novel ideas are almost Dangerous to us because they take us out of our routine. On one hand, there is nothing wrong with repetition of thoughts. One can master the steps in their lives, execute a task list and get a lot accomplished. However, where is the excitement, the jois de vivre?

Mastering ones emotional life which is the basis of The Way of the Emotional Warrior means that there is a basic methodology involved. This basic system of thought or mindset has to be centered around happiness, fulfillment, success, contribution, love etc…

Lets look at an example. You fill up your car with fuel. There is a standard for basic gasoline and most cars run well on that fuel. However, some cars require a higher grade fuel in order to run efficiently. Maybe, its worth looking at a vehicle that runs on a completely different fuel source? This is thinking in possibilities.

If you put the same information into your consciousness every day then that will become a habit and your life will reflect only those thoughts. If you truly want something better and uplevel your life you have to break out of the routine. Yes, this requires some effort but the benefits are tremendous.

A great place to start is to simply substitute one or a few emotions for higher level ones. Using the small steps philosophy of kaizen try driving to work with an audiobook or podcast playing instead of music. Maybe your commute that normally aggravates you and is a source of frustration and anger can become a more serene space because you enjoy listening to the content. Remember to drive safely😊

The point of all this is that you are better served living in a world of possibilities than limitations and certainly will gain more value from your life when you increase its quality.

Consider exchanging the following. Lower level emotions are shame, guilt, apathy, grief, fear, desire, anger and pride. Substitute one of them for courage, neutrality, willingness, acceptance, reason, love, joy, or peace.

Emotional freedom does not mean the absence of emotions it means accessing and living in and with the...

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Ep42 Eternal Now

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Is there really any other time than now?

I recently came across an interesting piece of research which talks about an emotion called “acedia.” It means being listless, low energy, anxious. The inception of the term was describing what monks have to process through as they enter their monastic life. Much of their time is spent in isolation and the proverbial walls of their cloister cells tend to cave in on them. What really stuck out was the line, a mind seized by this emotion leaves the person unable to stay still and unable to devote any time to what one actually wants to do. In our house we call it antsiness. Of course you like your place and those close to you but all you want to do is break out.

In terms of our pandemic lockdown situation, I think it really challenged our ability to spend time with ourselves. There are many reasons why this has been difficult but among some of the highest is much of our pre Covid lifestyle revolved around a bombardment of information and frenzy of energy to match it. What we call busy lives may be more along the lines of doing so many things and many of them at the same time that there is no time for being at peace by ourselves.

One of the main goals of an emotional warrior is gaining internal peace. Often it is called being at peace. Apparently this harder than most people think. The moment TV, phone and computer/internet energies cease one simply does not know what to do. There are online courses on how to detox from some of this incoming energy...irony. However, there is validity to the idea that humans need to spend some time just Being, being at peace in their environment.

Emotional Warriors know to insert this into their lives. It could be as simple as scheduling time to do so. Maybe Friday starting at 5pm all electronics shut down for 1 hour and then slowly build up to 24 hours. With enough practice a healthy balance will emerge.

This brings us to the main topic of this episode…the Eternal Now. This is often referred to in philosophy and literature. The eternal now is at the end of the day the only reality we can be in. The past has happened, it can not be changed and too many people wallow in it either for longing or regret. The future is great but can on happen down the road. There is the ever present Now one has to move through to get there.

That is why I spoke earlier about all the distractions. Too many distractions simply do not allow for living in the Now. All news is the past. It already happened. Of course it is important to be up to date on worldly events but constant news updates do not allow for being in the Now.

Why is the Now so important? Consider the idea that we only can live and make decisions in the Now. An emotional warrior seeks freedom. In other words its all about emotional freedom. It makes sense that emotional freedom happens in the domain of the Now. Making choices in the Now about the Now and for the Now means that you are present. Of course you have to set goals. That is a separate topic. For now, lets clarify the point.

Acedia is a type of restlessness that leads to emotional energy running amuck. There is no emotional direction or focus. How can you make choices that help you increase the quality of your emotional, spiritual and physical life when you are simply reaction to incoming energy that is in a frenzy.

The point is to settle down your energy. Once you settle down you can spend more time being present and living in the Now. You will be happier because you can actually concentrate on yourself and clean up your interior world. This will let you be a better person not only for yourself but those close to you and your community.

The eternal now is our plane of reality. It is where we live and operate as human beings. This leads to being emotionally balanced which...

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Ep41 How to Get Out of a Funk

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: When my mood is less than optimal, how can I get out of my emotional funk?

Doing some cursory research for this episode, I found that there are quite a few websites that will tell you 10 to 45 tips on how to maintain your mood. On the heavy hitter list are strategies such as a mood journal, proper diet and exercise, and interactions with nature.

I thought that it might be a good idea before we get into any strategies, to actually take a look at why we have mood swings. Of course there are triggers. Maybe someone slighted you or you simply are at odds with the current state of affairs, locally to globally. But aren’t there times when none of that changes and you find yourself feeling okay, dare I say good?

On some level, I think that it has become normal to be below a 5 on scale of 1 to 10. Somehow the grumbling and complaining has become the norm. In a way I am sure it is about attention. To some degree it is about fitting in. For example, you find yourself in a group that you have to attend, ie a group at a job, and after 2 hellos it becomes a complaint fest. As if any of the participants are even in a position to change anything. So, when in Rome, right? What do you do? You add to the list of complaints, everyone is happy that you too are miserable. If you step back a second, how much of your life is dictated by the low vibration of others. You don’t want to make any waves etc… Since most people extend their work relationships into their friendships, you can see where this goes…nowhere empowering, that’s for sure.

We have many reasons for doing all this but with enough time, it becomes normal. According to neuroscience, Dr. Joe Dispenza, states that by the age of 35 your dominant personality and outlook on life are in place. Your subconscious takes on that particular mindset.

Are you stuck in this repetitious cycle? Why, you may ask.. It has to do with 2 natural laws which are the law of rhythm and the law of polarity. Polarity means “poles” or bookends of a continuum. Think of good and evil, up and down, light and dark etc… The reason for opposites is simple. There can only be expansion if something is thrown out of kilter so that something new can emerge. That new something can be an improvement. For people, we fluctuate between constancy and variety. We seek comfort through constancy but immediately want something different for variety. This allows us to gain perspective and grow.

The law of rhythm is what drives the experience of polarity. Think of it this way: Rhythm is movement and the direction is somewhere between the polar opposites.

Why does this matter? An emotional warrior can learn to use this to live a better quality of life. In your life dimensions, health, relationships, finances etc…what if you could predict where on the continuum you are?

Just like there are seasons of the year, think about the seasons for every aspect of your life. Certain foods grow better in spring and summer and not so much in the fall and winter. What if you aligned your life with these rhythms? Investments have cycles, your budget has cycles, your relationships have cycles.

An emotional warrior can be ready for these cycles and better yet, know the parts of the cycle and live accordingly. Ex: winter is a great time to work out because there is less outdoor activity, in the summer your system naturally functions longer throughout the day and has more energy to do so. Money has cycles. There are times where it makes sense to save and then there will be the right opportunity to spend that saved wealth and seize an excellent opportunity of value.

The key with all this is quite simple. There is no need to stay in a negative environment and mindset. Find your own groove. Learn to identify the polarities and realize the rhythms involved. Now you...

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Ep40 Resilience

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How can I be resilient?

Resilience…seems like an obvious concept right? So what does it mean to be resilient? Its really about knowing where you are on the continuum of your own actions. Are you reactive? Do you find that life happens to you? How can you tell if this is you? You find yourself having to constantly fix something. This could be something tangible like a car battery to your relationships, to your health. Things happen and you have to deal with them, usually from a place of being under or a victim.

Jumping to the other side of the continuum…you try to preempt and control everything. In order to not be in the position of being under, you take the “bull by the horns” and go all out in terms of trying to control everything. The reason is that if you control it then you can determine what happens and how they will impact you.

The issue with both of these extremes is that they simply do not work exclusively. If you are a controller, how has that been going? How much anxiety do you have? How often does all of your controlling simply leave you at odds with events because even with all of your manipulation, things don’t work out according to the plan? There is a tremendous amount of frustration with this approach. It might feel like you are always fighting with people and the world.

So, not caring leaves you a victim and caring too much leaves you ill and frustrated. Is there a middle ground?

This is the Way of the Emotional Warrior. It really starts with working on yourself. How can you get right and solid? It begins with Heart-Based Resilience. This means that you set your life up to function from your heart vs your head. You absolutely have to take the time to center and activate your heart. This means you have to start with taking some time for yourself. Start with 15 minutes a day. What should you do in these 15 minutes? You place your hand on your chest by your heart. Breathe deeply, in and out. Try to count to 5 in each direction.

Next, keep a journal and set yourself some heart based resilience goals. The middle of the road means that you know the extremes and find a space in between where you feel you can live sustainably. You are Right with the ebb and flow of life.

Each day you find something to work on, set it into your mindset by bringing it to yourself by way of the heart. Why no the mind you might be asking. Well, the mind is obviously included but remember the brain’s job is survival programming. The extremes mentioned earlier are the result of brain thinking vs heart thinking. Brain formulates strategies for survival, reaction or preemptive control. The heart seeks unification, sustainable living.

What does any of this matter? I would think it has to do with living, more particularly, living a good life. This might seem pie in the sky but the extremes around this lead to strife and dysfunction.

What can you work on in terms of resilience? 1. Resilience means that you can identify the actual issue and 2. That you can adapt to deal with the issue. So the idea is this: Let’s work on 3 things. Your health, your relationships and your finances. Of course each one is super important but just for a cursory look, here we go.

Your health…heart-based resilience means that you value your life, not just once a year but at all times. You don’t live in fear. You work on your diet, your exercise, your mental well being. Address each area by creating solutions. Maybe you elevate your diet. How to start? Maybe its just by eliminating some unhealthy choices.

Your relationships: You most likely have a good list of what someone else should be like. Depending on your age you have had experiences that leave you seeing how others don’t measure up. Heart based reliance would be that you set aside finding something for a bit and work on yourself....

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Ep39 Your Best Life

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of:

Have you lived your best life?

At times I have had the opportunity to sit across from someone who relaxes a bit and allows some of their truth to come out. More than once has the following happened. The other person starts to reminisce about their past by bringing up their moments of triumph. That in itself is not the reveal, it actually happens when they continue to talk about their past and then…wait for it…they flat out tell you that those were the best days of their lives. For ex: back when I was in my twenties, well, let me tell you, the things that I did..those were the days…

Spooling forward to the present, you can see their energy drop. Their life choices have gotten them to a place where they never imagined themselves to be. I am not saying they don’t like their current lives, they simply seem to feel that their BEST days have already gone by and when they get nostalgic they can’t help but enter a feeling of regret and longing for a better time in their lives.

One example of this is shown in a song by the musician Eric Church.

Young and wild like they said we should've never been

And still a child filling those nights with grown up sin

I burned up some cars, burned down some hearts

Just to call myself a man

I might not do it the same but I'd do it all again

To stay young and wild as long as you can

He sets the mood in the song that those were the best days.

Another example comes from the all time great, Bruce Springsteen, in his song: Glory Days. He says:

There's this girl that lives up the block, back in school she could turn all the boys heads

Sometimes on Friday i'll stop by and have a few drinks after she put her kids to bed

Her and her husband bobby, well they split up, i guess it's two years gone by

We just sit around talking about the old times, she says when she feels like crying she starts laughing thinking about

Glory days...

Think i'm going down to the well tonight and i'm gonna drink till i get my fill

I hope when i get older i don't sit around thinking about it, but i probably will

Yeah just sitting back trying to recapture a little of the glory of

Well the time slips away and leaves you with nothing, mister, but boring stories of

Glory days...

The reason I wanted to do this episode is that an Emotional Warrior focuses more on forward moving energy. Of course there is nothing wrong with looking back upon your life. Its your life, after all. However, the part that one needs to be careful about is that when the past becomes the best part of your life then you end up living a life that is about marking time to the point where you die.

Glory days exist. There have been phenomenal moments in all of our lives. They can be great memories just don’t let them become energy traps.

One of the best parts about growing older and wiser in life is the accumulation of knowledge and understanding which lets you become more creative and interactive with the life you lead and interactions with those around you.

An Emotional Warrior is about living with Heart based Coherence and resilience. We know that the one constant in the universe is change. It happens all the time. Often change is not easy for people. Awareness of the changes and subsequent rhythms governed by the law of rhythm and the law of polarity let you become more attuned on how to weave and navigate the waters of the future.

The neuroscience of resilience is fascinating. The bulk of our brain, 90+% is dedicated to our survival. It is mostly subconscious programming, to survive. What if you can use that programming to your advantage?

What if your Glory Days, your ability to be Wild can be accessed every day? What if it is not about being crazy and doing outrageous things but instead expanding your interior awareness and life. Think of...

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Ep38 Living…Normal

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: How can one live this thing called normal?

So the main issue we need to look at is the notion of what is normal? You hear this all the time. Normal this or hey, that’s not normal. Somewhere out there I think most people believe that there is a normal or point of reference. Then it is believed that the closer you are to it the more normal or right you are in your thoughts and actions.

If this were really all so simple why is normal such an elusive mistress? When I was little I never fully understood what this normal life actually was. Think about it, we are born, not really by choice, (well…mostly) into a family we didn’t have a choice over, (mostly) and into a time and place outside of our control. Talk about not having a center.

On top of being cast into a life without an operator’s manual, we are supposed to act normal, when essentially few people can agree on what that actually is or means?

Let’s look a bit deeper into normal. The Cambridge definition says that normal is ordinary or usual, the same as would be expected. So we can already see that normal is pretty bland, the same old same old. Sure it is consistent and that is good for a while but it will pretty quickly get challenged by novelty and variety. To me normal would be good as a point of reference but not really of value to living an authentic vivacious, dynamic life.

One way to look at normal is through the lens of neuroscience. The term in this field for normal is homeostasis. This helps animals maintain stable internal and external environments with the best conditions for it to operate.

So if we use normal and homeostasis interchangeably you can see that it is no longer bland. Homeostatic balance means that you can have your own being interact with the world around you in the best overall fashion.

This is what I would call a sustainable state of being. IS there more? According to Donald Riggles, our brains process a staggering 11 million bits of information per second, of that 50 bits per second are conscious. Neuroscience shows that survival and pleasure reactions are the main task of our unconscious mind and are directly involved with our health and well being.

Consider this for a second. Our health and well being are being handled by our unconscious mind and mainly work on our interaction with pleasure and pain.

There is a secretion of adrenaline, dopamine and oxytocin, all which maintain our balanced state.

These bookends or guardrails keep us in check and balanced.

So…tieing this together, Our brains are hard wired to consistently bring us back into a state of balance which means that we have an internal sense of normal. We know what normal is at all times. However, with our lifestyles, we spend a lot of time and effort on being out of balance, consider diet and exercise.

So if we know what normal is internally and by design, why do we have such a hard time with it?

Let’s look at this from the perspective of an Emotional Warrior. What is clear from this viewpoint is that the heart controls the show. Resilience and love are the tools for emotional balance and vibrational consciousness. This means that the Emotional Warrior spends their time actualizing their natural, authentic, normal state and then navigates their external world to find places and activities where that normalcy can be lived.

Simply put, an Emotional Warrior lives an authentic heart based life on the inside and the outside. Confusion and chaos begin to fade away allowing for growth, fulfilment and actualization.

Consider how wonderful this lived life is and can be. In the next episode we look at life within these guardrails. I look forward to seeing you there.

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Ep37 Rock Back and Gain Perspective

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Why am I not moving forward?

Do you ever notice that you are simply not moving forward in your life? It always really frustrated me to feel like I was stuck. To be fair nothing was really wrong, it just felt like there was no forward movement or momentum. Generally, I have the type of personality that likes for things to move forward. Sure, I don’t like or want things to be out of control…I mean who does? However, within the guardrails of a “Good Life” I certainly appreciate forward movement.

What do I mean by forward movement? I view it as a type of improvement. One of the theories that I advocate weekly is called kaizen. It is a Japanese Business philosophy that translates to continuous improvement. I think it is super rewarding and gratifying to improve yourself. This is not based on competition but rather an intrinsic exploration and actualization of yourself. For example, one can work on their negative emotions. The ones that are below the vibrational level of 200. They do not serve your growth. They bring your energy and vibration down and now it becomes increasing more difficult to improve oneself. So, aim for the emotions above the 200 level.

They are: Courage at 200

Neutrality at 250

Willingness at 310

Acceptance at 350

Reason at 400

Love at 500

Joy at 540

Peace at 600

Enlightenment at 700 to 1000

Just looking at this list feels good. Just let possibility enter your mindset. So, those kaizen small steps of continuous improvement can help you expand your way of thinking and interacting with the world.

The only comparison you should worry about is yourself and even that is unnecessary. When you live in a state of Flow, doing what you like, there is nothing to compare to. You are doing your “thing” the way you want to do it.

In that state you are vibrating at least at 500. That has built into it a momentum that keeps everything moving forward. So, you can see that you are already Not Stuck.

I heard the following: Before you move forward, maybe you need to take a step back and gather some perspective. In that case, not moving forward is by design, a way for you consider if you are moving forward in the right direction or if you need to change course.

What about the Neuroscience?

According to neuroscientist, David Eagleman – not only does adventuring make you interesting, you know the type of person people are drawn to, but it also makes your smarter, even more productive at work (!!!!) and more attractive to the opposite sex.”

In a psychological study conducted at Indiana University it was found that by merely imagining we’re on an adventure, we improve our creativity and self-awareness.

So when you step back or rock back and allow for a new perspective to emerge think adventure. Doing something really cool. That will awaken your creativity and self awareness. Imagine the possibilities.

Emotional Warriors not only know about this but practice this quite regularly. This rocking back to get a new and different perspective is a wonderful skill to add to your emotional toolbag.

The expanse of possibilities can be scary but if you know that you can practice a technique of higher vibration to channel your forward moving energy into becoming an asset for your own adventure.

Peace

End: I hope you enjoyed this episode and I will see you next time around…take care.

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Ep36 Micro or Macro Optimist

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of: Are you a Micro or Macro Optimist?

Lets start with what is an optimist?

An optimist is someone who has a hopeful outlook and typically expects good outcomes. For example: in the US, 42 to 45% of first marriages end in divorce and 60% of second marriages divorce. So, roughly ½ of marriages end in divorce. Yet: and here comes the kicker…Newlyweds believe that their marriage will survive. So, when people get married they do not believe that their marriage will end in divorce. That translates to an anticipated zero % divorce rate.

So, why marriages end in divorce is a different topic but that ½ fail while no one believes it will be theirs is our topic of investigation.

Neuroscience has some very interesting research that basically shows how we are hard wired to be optimistic. We will get to that in a second.

First, I want to explore my title of micro and macro optimism. The idea is this. A person can be quite optimistic bout the long term, like: Of course everything will be alright once everything settled down. Or, certainly I am mostly happy.

However, how optimistic are people in the short term? You might think that you are optimistic in the overall but day to day you look at various life situations only to discover that you simply don’t like most of what you do each and every day.

So micro optimistic is that in the immediate, you find yourself very frustrated. Everything is slow, not really satisfying, not allowing you to be happy. But, on a macro level when someone speaks with you, there is an overall hopefulness and belief that everything will turn out alrght.

To me this is quite strange. How can so many small non optimistic experiences still allow for a long term positive outlook?

Let’s create a plan on how to use this all to our advantage.

1. Always a good frame of reference is neuroscience. An expert in this field is Tali Sharot. Her work as a professor of cognitive neuroscience at University College London focuses on the crossroads of how emotions and memory play on our perceptions and behaviors. One of her favorite ideas in this field is the so-called optimism bias; the tendency of humans to be biased towards positive thinking. Worries and woe might seem like fundamental cornerstones of the human condition, but it appears that we tend to perceive our personal future with staunch optimism, even at the risk of being irrational. In that sense, Tali bluntly notes: “People are not driven by facts, they are driven by emotion” her studies showed that brain activity clearly shows a pattern of shushing negative foresight, yet livening up at the thought of positive visions. When processing thoughts about our own future, the brain effectively has a ‘good vibes only’ policy.

- Check – our brains have the predilection to push us towards optimism and positivity

2. Since we perfectly align with Macro-optimism to the neuroscience findings, we are also already good to go in this area.

3. What’s left is the micro-optimism. How can we shift our emotions and thoughts to not get locked up in negative self doubt spirals?

Answer – we become Emotional Warriors. This means that you pull yourself together and set your intentions and then move towards manifesting them. You do this best through the small steps philosophy of kaizen. Kaizen means continuous improvement. So how can you improve your micro-optimism? Think about an area that is not filled with too much doubt. Don’t immediately try to fix the worst offenders. So let’s say you find something wrong with your body image. Maybe your nose, cheeks, arms, your butt…who knows, something along these lines bothers you. Try finding something that lets you be more positive about it. Let’s say its your nose. To you its not shaped right. Maybe you can look at some pictures of people that you...