Maeven turns two, Bryn wishes he was turning four, and everyone gets cupcakes. Peter and Beth discuss what to do when your kids threaten your life, the benefits of putting dirty pacifiers in your mouth, and how to discipline your kids when experienced caregivers are watching.

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The kids see Peter perform on stage. Peter and Beth disagree about Bryn having a past life, discuss a study finding that chores lead to success in life, their reasons for moving to the suburbs once they had a kid and answer a listener's question about about a reluctant dad.

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Peter and Beth discuss Senator Tammy Duckworth giving birth while in office and a study of how fast women and men change diapers and debate how they would handle their kids trying to touch wild animals. Peter gets the whole family sick before leaving town, the kids learn dirty words.

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Beth and Peter discuss their children’s love of all things potty, how they would deal with a super-powered child, and the science behind laughter. The hosts answer a listener’s question about teething and remember their time as after school monitors at a private school.

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Beth and Peter discuss their children’s ongoing winter illnesses, the guilt of sending your kids to daycare sick, the pressure of having childless friends over, and why Peter hates YouTube. They rate themselves as parents, 3-year-old Bryn claims that the spanish word for fart is “fartalota,” and Peter cries over literal spilled milk.

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Comedians Peter and Beth introduce themselves and discuss the science behind why little girls love pink. Beth describes getting in a car accident with the kids in the car and the two discuss Peter’s mom’s parenting philosophy of “it’s when they don’t cry that you should be worried.”

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Comedian couple Beth Newell (Reductress) and Peter McNerney (Story Pirates) discuss their two children and offer up non-expert opinions on parenting

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