Well Connected Relationships Podcast

In episode 8 we explore moving from a state of stress (or DISTRESS) into one of kindness and wellbeing as we close out a really challenging year and set intentions for the new one. And we take a look at how the stresses of 2020 are impacting our relationships and what to do to mitigate that impact.

Want insights about how forgiveness can help relieve the painful resentment many of us are feeling right now as our world feels so divided and why forgiveness often seems out of reach? I sat down with Margaret Cullen, M.A., MFT, who is Founding Faculty of the Compassion Cultivation Training program, developed at the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research at Stanford Medical School. We explored what forgiveness is and isn't, who it most benefits, and most importantly, how to cultivate forgiveness for yourself and others. I think it will change the way you view and practice forgiveness of yourself and in your relationships.

I sat down with Lorraine Hobbs, founding director of the Youth, Family & School-based Programs at the University of California, San Diego Center for Mindfulness where she develops mindfulness-based curricula for parents, teens and children and has been a pioneer in the area of self-compassion for teens. Together, we explore how to notice the effects of stress on the kids in your life and offer them fun and useful tools for reducing it – tools that have also been shown to help children improve focus, self-control and academic performance, increase their ability to resolve conflict and improve their overall sense of wellbeing. (And they work for us grown-ups, too!)

Michelle sits down with practicing psychologist Dr. Susan Pollak, MTS, Ed.D., author of the Psychology Today blog and Compassion for Parents: Nurture Your Child By Caring for Yourself and explores why it's particularly hard to be a parent right now and how self-compassion is the key to both feeling better and parenting better, too. The advice she gives to parents applies to anyone who feels like they have to control everything right now, but are failing and who needs to extend a little kindness to themselves.

Did you know compassion can be fierce? I sat down with self-compassion expert, Dr. Kristin Neff, and explored fierce compassion, the subject of her forthcoming book. We cover what it is, how to practice it from a place of love – even when you feel angry or critical – and why it's exactly what our relationships, our communities and our world needs now more than ever.

We'll explore the two sides of compassion – the strong side and the soft, vulnerable side – and how both are needed to create truly resilient relationships. You'll discover what each side offers you and your relationships, which one you personally need to cultivate more of and how best to discern which side to show in any given moment.

We'll explore the trickiest human emotion (shame) that most people don't realize is having an impact on their ability to relate well to others. We cover how to recognize it and release yourself (and your relationships) from its often painful grip.

We'll explore the common experience of getting stuck in our threat-defense system during moments of stress or conflict inside our relationships. If you've found yourself arguing, defending your position, criticizing, blaming, withdrawing, leaving, or placating (or being on the receiving end of those behaviors) this episode offers helpful perspective on what is really going on when that's happening AND simple practices to shift the dynamic quickly.