When something annoys you, causing you to complain, get defensive, etc., it is a reflection of what already lives inside you. It’s a reaction to wanting something to change that you have no control over. And as long as you’re looking for someone to change their annoying ways, you give them power over your emotions. It comes from an unwillingness to take responsibility for yourself and how you perceive others. Ever notice that when you’re not feeling good about yourself, you shift your focus to someone else and what’s wrong with them? You complain about how they do things or get mad at their inherent character flaws.

The thing is, we’re all annoying sometimes. No one is immune. Perhaps someone thinks you’re annoying because you’re quiet when they want you to speak up. Or you’re annoying because you drive too slow. Annoyance is a response to what is done (or not done), not the act itself. It’s based on the meaning we give to actions and what feelings it triggers inside. If someone at the grocery store is in your way and you label them as oblivious or inconsiderate, it’s an opportunity to look at where YOU are oblivious and inconsiderate. Instead of standing on your high horse, pointing fingers at others, look at why you are annoyed. What is being triggered in you? What don’t you accept about yourself? Realizing everyone can be annoying opens the door to compassion and understanding… and it may enable you to simply smile at the car who just cut you off.