When Teri first discovered the truth about her marriage, she didn’t have the words to describe what she was feeling. She only knew her world had exploded. In this episode of Where to Find Bread™, she talks with Jennie Bacon, (MS, LCPC, CCPS, DSTT, CCES) about the specific language of betrayal trauma and intimacy anorexia.
Teri sits down with Jennie who brings both professional expertise and profound lived experience to the field of betrayal trauma recovery.
If you have ever felt like you were living on top of a hidden world, or if gaslighting has made you feel confused and maybe even “insane,” this conversation will validate your experience. We move past the clinical alphabet soup of certifications to talk about the actual, life-saving tools that help partners and betrayers heal. From the “Personal Iceberg” of the Minwalla Model to the essential safety steps of the APSATS framework, we explore exactly why specialized help is non-negotiable.
*What You’ll Learn in This Video:*
- Understanding the “Personal Iceberg” model for addiction
- Decoding sex addiction and betrayal trauma
- Key therapy tools: EMDR, EFT, ABSATS, Minwalla Model
- Navigating recovery from discovery to full disclosure
- Why betrayal trauma is considered domestic abuse
- The importance of professional, specialized help
- Pathways to post-traumatic growth and relationship repair *
Video Chapters:*
0:00:00 - Introduction to the “Iceberg Model” and today’s guest, Jenny Bacon
0:01:05 - Jenny’s Journey: From Corporate to Betrayal Trauma Counseling
0:04:15 - Understanding EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing)
0:06:08 - Exploring EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) for Reconnection
0:07:35 - Decoding ABSATS (Associated Partners of Sex Addiction Trauma Specialists) & Multi-Dimensional Partner Trauma
0:12:00 - The Minwalla Model: Secret Sexual Basements & the Two-Part Problem
0:17:15 - Early Recovery Couple’s Empathy Model (ERCEM) for Marital Healing
0:21:40 - Narrative Focused Trauma Care & Healing Family of Origin Wounds
0:25:30 - Why Qualified Professionals Matter in Betrayal Trauma Recovery
0:27:00 - Faith-Based vs. Non-Faith-Based Approaches to Healing
0:28:00 - Defining Betrayer and Betrayed: Gender Dynamics
0:29:45 - Licensed Counselor vs. Coach: Key Differences
0:33:00 - What is Betrayal Trauma? Understanding the Layers of Harm
0:35:10 - Betrayal Trauma and Complex PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)
0:36:30 - Who Seeks Help First: The Betrayer or the Partner?
0:38:00 - Defining Success in the Counseling Relationship
0:41:00 - The Surprising Prevalence of Pornography in the Church
0:45:00 - God’s Perception on Betrayal Trauma & Traditional Church Counsel
0:49:00 - Why the Minwalla Model Defines Betrayal as Domestic Abuse
0:50:40 - The Recovery Process: From Discovery to Therapeutic Disclosure
0:57:30 - Addressing Grief and Loss in Recovery
0:59:15 - Understanding Relapse and Partner Preparation
1:01:30 - Advice for the Betrayed Partner: First Steps to Healing
1:02:40 - Advice for the Betrayer: Finding Freedom from Addiction
1:03:30 - How to Contact Jenny Bacon & Find Qualified Resources
If you found this conversation insightful, please *subscribe, like,* and *share* this video! Visit Where to Find Bread™ for more resources and support on your healing journey. *
Connect With Us & Resources
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#sexaddictionrecovery #betrayaltrauma #emdrtherapy #efttherapy #complexptsd #domesticabuse #healingjourney #relationshipgoals #mentalhealth #addictionrecovery #traumacare #posttraumaticgrowth
Key Takeaways for Listeners:
* Trust your nervous system: If you feel “insane” because of conflicting realities, it’s likely a normal response to betrayal trauma.
* Specialization matters: Not every counselor is equipped to handle the nuances of sex addiction. Look for specialists trained in betrayal trauma (CSAT, APSATS, or Minwalla Model).
* Lies are the landmines: Most marriages don’t end because of the actions themselves, but because of the persistent lying. Truth is the only way forward.
* You aren’t alone: Whether you are the partner or the betrayer, there are support groups and resources designed to carry you when you can’t carry yourself.
Resources Mentioned:
* APSATS (Association of Partners of Sex Addiction Trauma Specialists)
* The Minwalla Model (Integrity Abuse Disorder)
* The Allender Center (Narrative-focused trauma care)
* The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
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