You can almost hear the producers trying to sell this show to Hulu: It’s hot Mormon moms… who are also swingers. Turns out only one of them was “swinging,” and the swinging was (in her words) “soft.” But it was enough to get Hulu — and now, millions of other viewers — on board with Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, which tracks the interlocking stories of eight Mormon influencers in Utah.

Like so much of contemporary reality television, this show is glossy, melodramatic, unhinged, and addictive. It’s entertainment, sure, but it’s also a way for us to think through some of our own understandings of marriage, sex, friendship, religion, and feminism — which is exactly what Sara Petersen and I try to work through in this episode. That, and whether Dakota is a paid actor.

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