Join Emily and Ky as they can't fucking believe how agregiously horrifying this film for fucking preteens is! Jesus Fucking Christ, we're all just fucking chill with the THIRTEEN YEAR OLD dating the SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD?? AM I ON DRUGS?! Yes, obviously the answer is yes. Everyone is casually assuming the other thirteen year old climbing into a middle-aged man's camper van is totes chill, and only a problem because she's keeping her BOYFRIEND a secret???? We at Wine, Weed, Weird feel particularly insane about this one. More strangness incoming, including children who think babysitting a bunch of small children is fun, and/or the only possible way they can spend time together. Has it occurred to them that they could...just not babysit all the time? No one can know. Side note: cookie jars exist! Anyway, buckle up.

I mean, is it about anything, or is Emily just shrieking with laughter and spouting dog facts while Ky and Teddy try to keep up? Listen in to discover everyone’s favorite, and skeeviest dogs, Emily’s complex feelings about her dad’s dog, whether the guy from Vice looks like a dog (he does), and why police dogs aren’t narcs (but ACAB!) Beaches are for Bitches, and Beach Bitches are the Best Bitches!

The beach is for bitches, and Emily and Ky are out there celebrating a cunning slut, even though they called them fleshy. This bait and switch documentary is hands-down the horniest thing they’ve ever covered for the pod, and they covered “My Ding-a-ling” in season one! Does the mysterious narrator make a love connection? Do Emily and Ky have pollen sacks glued to them? Does the fruit show up in time for the bats? Did Teddy get their sand castle built? Did Emily and Ky get spanked and sandwiched by a horse?? All this and more on (one of) our very special beach episodes!

Emily and Ky are back with take two on David the Gnome: a sweet, whimsical, cozy show about an exploitative and/or senile doctor, a fox getting run to death just like his predecessors, a psychic troll with no motivation, and a hippo on vacation. Look, we don’t write this stuff. We just find it. There’s also drugs, inscrutable interpersonal relationships, excessive world building, and a mouse left for dead who was a better dancer than Ray Gun. It’s a can’t-miss episode!

Emily and Ky are back with more SSA Mormon husbands!! Did you think they forgot about you?? Never fear! We at Wine Weed Weird Headquarters are continuing to sort out the best system to record and publish for US! And also you. But mostly us, lol. This week we learn about the Danger Scale, the binary, and petition Nicholas Cage to help us with some very special plates…don’t miss it!

Naturally we needed two weeks to delve into a topic that hits all our sweet spots: religious trauma! Neuro-spicy-ness! Gay! Or…NOT??? Join Emily and Ky as we get to the bottom of Mormonism, and figure out what SSA really stands for!

Due to technical difficulties, and by technical difficulties we mean user error, you will not be hearing Emily and Ky discuss David the Gnome this week. Instead Emily and friend of the pod Teddy are in these streets in rural Pennsylvania praying cell service holds out long enough for Emily to explain color analysis. So what did we learn? Squeezing your fingertips is helpful. Emily will cry if you tell her her season is wrong. Teddy looks like a clown in bright colors. There’s a dot to look for to tell you if your phone’s microphone or camera are on. Slide into our dm’s @Wineweedweird on the gram, and tell us your season!

Where are Emily and Ky? You can’t know! But you can know all about navigating dial up internet in the most gendered way possible! Take a spin, now you’re in, but the techno set can’t explain defragging. Emily and Ky are discussing the Kid’s Guide to the Internet! Get ready to email the president irrelevant information, mysteriously find websites, take the whole family to see the Stones, and have your grandpa buy you a modem! God bless 90’s VHS tapes and all who archive them!