Sure, it’s scary to send your writing to a literary agent. But pity the poor agent who must wade through hundreds of terrible query letters a week! One of them shares excerpts from those hilariously bad query letters on a blog called SlushPile Hell. And get ready for some colorful conversation: Purple cows do exist–only they’re made with grape soda and ice cream. And yes, Virginia, there IS an English word that rhymes with “orange”! Plus, catawampus, mesmerize, all’s I’m saying, plus messing and gauming.

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