Better Husband

052|You Stopped Dating Your Wife—and It Shows


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🎯 Want to Be a Better Husband? Download the Better Husband Toolkit—a short, powerful guide with three essential skills you can start using today to improve your marriage. Get yours now at www.betterhusbandtoolkit.com.

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In this episode, we’re looking at what happens when pursuit fades and your marriage shifts from warmth and play to logistics and maintenance. Angelo talks about why men stop initiating, how fear and pressure get in the way, and how to bring back a steady rhythm of simple, generous connection that softens the tone at home and restores closeness.

You’ll learn how to lead with presence instead of performance, invite her in with clear, thoughtful planning, and use cherishing and generosity to keep the fire alive.

🔑 What You’ll Learn in This Episode:
✅ Why marriages drift when you stop pursuing your wife
✅ The hidden mix of busyness, pressure, and fear that blocks initiative
✅ How to pursue without pressure by focusing on presence over perfection
✅ Simple invitations that create consistent connection
✅ Why cherishing and generosity (RLT) reignite closeness and desire
✅ How steady pursuit changes the feel of your home and friendship

💡 Key Takeaway:
Pursuit is leadership rooted in care. Small, consistent invitations say, “You matter. We matter.” When you plan simple moments on purpose, you shift your marriage from maintenance back to warmth, play, and ease.

🔨 Action Steps This Week:
1⃣ Put it on the calendar.
Choose a night within the next two weeks and plan something for the two of you to do together. Don’t wait until you “feel ready” or until things calm down—life won’t hand you the time. Make it. Pick a day, block it off, and commit. It doesn’t have to be fancy. It just has to happen.

2⃣ Lead with curiosity.
Ask her what she’s been missing lately. What kind of moments make her feel most connected, most alive? Listen without defending or overthinking. You’re not trying to get a grade—you’re learning her. Rediscover what lights her up.

3⃣ Be generous and intentional in the planning.
If what she wants isn’t your first choice, that’s okay. Practice generosity—do it anyway, and do it with a good heart. Not because you’re giving in, but because you’re giving to. Include something for you as well. This isn’t about disappearing; it’s about creating something that brings both of you joy—hers, yours, and the joy between you. Then take a breath. You led. You planned. You followed through. Now pay attention to what happens next.

4⃣ Notice the ripple.
In the days that follow, watch what changes. Does the home feel lighter? Do conversations and laughter come easier? Let that remind you: effort creates warmth. The more you invest, the more life returns to the marriage.

5⃣ Ask and appreciate.
A day or two later, check in with her. Ask what she loved most, what she’d like to repeat, and what could make it even better next time. Listen—really listen—without taking it personally. Her feedback isn’t criticism; it’s a gift. It means she’s invested, engaged, and cares.

🧠 Reflection Questions:
❓ When was the last time you truly pursued your wife—not just went out, but planned with the aim of making her feel cared for, seen, and chosen?
❓ What story do you tell yourself about why it’s hard to plan? Is it busyness? Fear of getting it wrong? Or that quiet belief: She already knows I love her—I shouldn’t have to prove it.
❓ How would

Ready to Take Action?
🚨 Watch the FREE Better Husband Workshop → BetterHusbandSecrets.com

Questions?
📩 Email Me[email protected]

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Better HusbandBy Angelo Santiago

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