Trigger Warning: This episode discusses infant loss, including miscarriage and stillbirth. Please listen with care.

Little baby Nicholas was diagnosed with multicystic dysplastic kidney syndrome after an anatomy scan. Doctors advised that they would just keep an eye on it, assuring Jennifer that he should be a normal functioning baby. Tragically, Nicholas had blood clots in his umbilical cord and was stillborn at 33 weeks.

In this episode, Jennifer shares her journey, including her move to Florida, discovering she was pregnant, and finding new care for herself and her baby. She talks about choosing the name Nicholas after learning she was pregnant in December. Jennifer also reflects on the heartbreaking moment when she was told that her son no longer had a heartbeat.

Some highlights from this episode with Jennifer:

• A difficult delivery experience and the trauma following her baby's death

• Confusion and frustration with medical staff during a stressful hospital visit

• Memories of Nicholas, including a memory box given to them at the hospital

• Events during the funeral planning and service and dealing with the loss of a child due to 

• Losing Nicholas at birth due to an umbilical cord complication

While the pain of losing Nicholas may never fade, Jennifer continues to honor his memory in meaningful ways, finding healing and purpose along the journey.

Quotes:

“My baby shower was supposed to be the weekend that he passed away. So that was kind of hard to call people and say, ‘Hey, you know, please don't show up at my house.’” – Jennifer (16:34)

“I cremated him because I wanted him to come home in some sense.” – Jennifer (48:34)

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Links: 

Grief Support Groups: https://nationalshare.org/

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