The Pineapple Express: A Millennial’s Guide to Love, Sex Positivity, Non-Monogamy, Polyamory & Swinging

110: 'Tolyamory' and The Dangers Of Practicing Non Monogamy To Keep Your Partner


Listen Later

Send us a text

Let’s talk about the thing no one wants to admit: sometimes we say yes to non-monogamy not because we want to—but because we’re afraid to lose someone we love. In this episode, we dive deep into the term “tolyamory” (coined by Dan Savage), the danger of choosing open relationships out of fear instead of desire, and how to tell if you’re actually aligned with non-monogamy… or just tolerating it.

We’ll unpack:

  • The red flags of “tolyamory”
  • Why consent isn’t just a checkbox—it’s a felt sense
  • How to check in with your nervous system before saying yes
  • What to do if your partner wants non-monogamy and you don’t
  • How to reclaim your voice, your boundaries, and your truth—even when it’s hard

Whether you’re the one asking or being asked to open up, this episode is for you. Let’s stop calling it love when it’s really fear. 💔➡️💖

DAY OF VISIBILITY EVENTS 

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/3rd-annual-day-of-visibility-for-non-monogamy-picnic-in-the-park-tickets-1398059807519

https://www.weekofvisibility.com/

Support the show

🎙️ The Pineapple Express Podcast
Subscribe to my Substack for exclusive content: The Pineapple Express Substack.

💡 Events & Coaching

  • Coaching sessions: Book time with me.

💜 Advocacy & Community Action Support equity and sexual freedom with the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom.
OPEN's Free Peer Support Group

🛍️ Exclusive Deals Just for You

Get The Non Monogamy Card Game and use my exclusive code PINEAPPLE10 for 10% Off

https://www.thenonmonogamycardgame.com/products/the-game

  • FirmTech Wearable Tech | Male Enhancement Rings | Shop now and get 15% off with code sexyswingerchick.
  • SENSE Shop | Condoms & Lube | Explore the collection and save 15% with code sexyswingerchic.
  • Sultry Vixen Dancewear | Exotic Outfits | Shop here and enjoy 15% off with code sexyswingerchic.
  • 💬 Let’s keep the conversation going! Follow me for up...
...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

The Pineapple Express: A Millennial’s Guide to Love, Sex Positivity, Non-Monogamy, Polyamory & SwingingBy Kiley ‘Sexyswingerchic’

  • 4.3
  • 4.3
  • 4.3
  • 4.3
  • 4.3

4.3

53 ratings


More shows like The Pineapple Express: A Millennial’s Guide to Love, Sex Positivity, Non-Monogamy, Polyamory & Swinging

View all
We Gotta Thing - A Swinger Podcast by Mr & Mrs Jones's Swinging Adventures

We Gotta Thing - A Swinger Podcast

772 Listeners

Wanderlust Swingers - A Swinger Podcast & Hotwife Lifestyle Stories by Cate and Darrell

Wanderlust Swingers - A Swinger Podcast & Hotwife Lifestyle Stories

225 Listeners

Room 77 Swinger Podcast | Lifestyle Podcast For Swingers by The BEST advice to never use!

Room 77 Swinger Podcast | Lifestyle Podcast For Swingers

479 Listeners

Front Porch Swingers by Brenna and Brian

Front Porch Swingers

519 Listeners

4OURPLAY - A Swinger Podcast by Bella & Jase - Millennial Swingers

4OURPLAY - A Swinger Podcast

327 Listeners

Friends With A Twist: A Swinger Podcast by Friends With A Twist: A Swinger Podcast

Friends With A Twist: A Swinger Podcast

282 Listeners

Hump Day Quickies : Swinger Confessions by G and Nessa

Hump Day Quickies : Swinger Confessions

352 Listeners

The Swing Nation - A Sex Positive Swingers Podcast by Northern guy and Southern Girl

The Swing Nation - A Sex Positive Swingers Podcast

1,350 Listeners

Accidental Swingers by Myrina and Tristan

Accidental Swingers

290 Listeners

Diary of a Swinging Couple by Diary of a Swinging Couple

Diary of a Swinging Couple

148 Listeners

THE MONOGAMISH MARRIAGE by Kate & Liam

THE MONOGAMISH MARRIAGE

182 Listeners

Vanilla Swingers - A Swinger Podcast for Newbies, by Newbies in the Lifestyle by Kat & Leo

Vanilla Swingers - A Swinger Podcast for Newbies, by Newbies in the Lifestyle

402 Listeners

Pineapple Pinup: Hotwife Swingers Life by Tasty Tress

Pineapple Pinup: Hotwife Swingers Life

139 Listeners

Southern Swingers by Southern Swingers

Southern Swingers

46 Listeners

Two Plus Two: The Swinger Podcast for Couples by Zack, Josie, Brad, Brittany

Two Plus Two: The Swinger Podcast for Couples

19 Listeners