Once Upon A Time...In Adopteeland

135. Patrick Hawes: "Pain Into Purpose"


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Patrick Hawes was born in Asheville NC in August 1970.  He was officially adopted at 6 weeks old, but from birth was separated from his birth mother.  Patrick’s adoptive mother was Japanese and his adoptive father was American, so was raised in a bi-racial family, but in reverse since he is  Caucasian. Sadly, his adoptive father passed away when he was 4 years old.

It was no secret that Patrick was adopted once people took one look at his adoptive mother in any kind of social setting.  He was bullied in school for having an Asian mother and often kids would slant their eyes to him.

The loss of his adoptive dad as a young boy only enhanced his abandonment issues and living with an adoptive mom who spoke broken English while he didn’t speak Japanese made their relationship challenging to say the least.  After finding his birth family at the age of 45, Patrick began going to therapy to deal with the myriad issues that he had growing up.  He remembers his counselor telling him that he was “perfectly suited for brokenness “ because of all the things that happened to him; being adopted, losing his father at 4 years old, having an adoptive mother who didn’t truly understand how to help him. Patrick doesn’t regret searching for and finding his birth mom.  It was all a part of Gods master plan. 

Music by Corey Quinn

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Once Upon A Time...In AdopteelandBy Jennifer Dyan Ghoston

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