The Best of You

181: The Healing Power of Safe People (Not Just Safe Spaces)


Listen Later

What do you do when relationships feels risky after you’ve been hurt, betrayed, or let down, yet you still crave real connection?

This week, Dr. Alison is joined by speaker, and author Toni Collier, for a powerful and honest conversation about healing through community and learning how to trust again after deep pain. 

Toni shares her story of betrayal and loss, and how she discovered the power of safe people - the kind who can hold your heart without judgment and help you rebuild when life falls apart. Together, they unpack what real friendship looks like and why isolation, while it feels safe, can slowly destroy us.

You’ll walk away with language for repair, courage to take off your “strong friend” cape, and practical wisdom for finding (and becoming) the kind of people who can walk with you through both heartbreak and healing.


This episode explores:

  • Why healing requires safe people, not just safe spaces
  • How to build a community that can hold your story
  • The difference between isolation and refuge
  • The courage it takes to say, “I need help”
  • The three steps to finding and keeping trustworthy friends
  • You can find Toni’s powerful book here:

    📚Don't Try This Alone: How to Build Deep Community When You Want to Hide from Your Pain


    Here are some other episodes you might like :

    Episode 104: Overcoming the Fear of Vulnerability

    Episode 76: Finding the Faith & Strength to Move Forward after Loss & Heartache 


    📖 Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here

    💬 Got a question? Call 307-429-2525 and leave a message for a future episode.


    Thanks to our Sponsors!

    • Go to ⁠Quince.com/bestofyou⁠ for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order!

    • Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/BESTOFYOU and get on your way to being your best self.

    • If you’re looking for a Bible that helps you live the Word, not just read it, then grab this beautiful one I’m currently using at NIVapplicationbible.com.

    • Go to shopremi.com/BESTOFYOU and use the code BESTOFYOU  at checkout for 50% off.

      *Some of the links above are Amazon affiliate links. If you choose to purchase through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.

      While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.‍

      © 2025 Alison Cook. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Please do not copy or share the contents of this webpage or transcript without permission from the author.

      Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

      ...more
      View all episodesView all episodes
      Download on the App Store

      The Best of YouBy Dr. Alison Cook

      • 4.9
      • 4.9
      • 4.9
      • 4.9
      • 4.9

      4.9

      800 ratings


      More shows like The Best of You

      View all
      The Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast by The Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast

      The Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast

      4,840 Listeners

      That Sounds Fun with Annie F. Downs by That Sounds Fun Network

      That Sounds Fun with Annie F. Downs

      10,435 Listeners

      Win Today: Your Roadmap to Wholeness by Art of Leadership Network

      Win Today: Your Roadmap to Wholeness

      505 Listeners

      Restoring the Soul with Michael John Cusick by Michael John Cusick

      Restoring the Soul with Michael John Cusick

      472 Listeners

      The Allender Center Podcast by The Allender Center

      The Allender Center Podcast

      655 Listeners

      The Next Right Thing by with Emily P. Freeman

      The Next Right Thing

      5,466 Listeners

      The Place We Find Ourselves by Adam Young | LCSW, MDiv

      The Place We Find Ourselves

      2,570 Listeners

      Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast by Debra Fileta, M.A., LPC and Creator of TrueLoveDates.com

      Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast

      790 Listeners

      The Jennie Allen Podcast by Jennie Allen

      The Jennie Allen Podcast

      6,656 Listeners

      The Boundaries.me Podcast by Dr. Henry Cloud

      The Boundaries.me Podcast

      857 Listeners

      Being Known Podcast by Being Known Podcast

      Being Known Podcast

      1,148 Listeners

      Lisa Harper's Back Porch Theology by AccessMore

      Lisa Harper's Back Porch Theology

      2,841 Listeners

      Therapy and Theology by Lysa TerKeurst

      Therapy and Theology

      2,049 Listeners

      The Dr. Leaf Show by Dr. Caroline Leaf

      The Dr. Leaf Show

      3,095 Listeners