30 Going On 13

In this episode we discuss our trials and tribulations with parenting small rodents,  how terrifying it would be to live in the early wild west days of reality tv, getting revenge on the people who nominated you, how "fashionable" Stacy and Clinton are, the specific type of trauma incurred by the subjects of reality tv,  getting absolutely ripped to shreds while in  a 3-way mirror aka the most vulnerable place on the planet, how a "big ass" used to be an insult, the irksome nature of throwing  the clothes out WITH the hangers into  an OG trash can, how Nick Arrojo only knows how to cut hair short, our ride or die Carmindy, Gina's visible PTSD at the end and SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

In this episode we discuss “The 4 S’s” of non-negotiable film genres, Oleato and lavender lattes, the Mini Egg & TCO supermash bros style mashup we’ve all been waiting for, comparing regional tv channels and Pizza Pizza phone numbers, the childhood/adulthood shock of seeing Kate’s belly, Leah being a “tiny controller”, whether we owe Kate an apology, the type of person who would become an AOD (Angel Of Death), if we’d give some of the sextuplets away, the complicated mathematics of their custody arrangement, when your hairstyle becomes a halloween costume, Jon’s transition to a DJ/stripper, the age old question: what is a DJ? And SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

In this episode we discuss Maddy choosing to not go into the family foley artist business, NYC baseball teams (weird), whether you're legally allowed to bully kids if they're rich, the worst year in fashion history aka 2009, scull scarves, the poor man's rich Chuck Bass, the money laundering scheme called Operation Smile, being burnt out at 10 y.o, Sebastian's sick addiction to "hooking up", hideous Tuscan apartments, BBM, how going to a restaurant in NYC is called "having a party", announcing you've never had sex with your husband on insta and SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

In this episode we discuss the sinister conspiracy involving mid-level celebrities and the game Royal Match, the signature filter of Canadian tv, getting attacked by 90's font, not being able to relate to the human experience of wearing a chef souffle hat, whether this show is just a giant health ed video for/by parents, stuffing your bra with ping pong balls and Nespresso pods, the scariest scene in the history of the world, the protocol needed for a male teacher handling a bra and SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

Guess what we talk about in this episode? Maddy's insane "economic theories" with no basis, 123-let-me-watch-this.com, low rise jeans making us sick with little tops, an internet outage occurs, resonating with Johnny Drama, HATING TURTLE the sex pest, doing a captcha with Turtle, Hummer "cars" HUMVEES, terrible service at THE GAP, Vince being a secretly bad actor, waiting for the moment we have our own entourage, a real deep Parent Trap callback, Jet and Cold Hard Bitch running the 2000s, Lola Freezes and the pyramids and... MATAHORN MATAHORN MATAHORN. 

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

In this episode we discuss how loose lipped we got during our live show, the way GusGus carries cheese, our take on the new seasons of True Detective and Fargo, Drake's leaked (long?) dick pic, the name Riley Stone as a perfect pornstar name, Lois' voluminous mom hair, Reese's standard issue spikey hair, the 2000s boom of pig-based pranks, Liv's experience with a pregnant Bhad Baby bully, how you have to age into your love and respect for Lois, how Hal is the only loveable lazy husband, our PTSD from toxic teen girl friendships and SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

In this episode we discuss how Winners is a full twilight zone, having hammerhead shark style tits, needing a masters in geometry to figure out bra sizes, the legality of eating chicken and mustard, our feelings about psychics, the perma shit cloud we’ve manifested, how every teenage girl from the 70s/80s was always packing up the car and moving to LA, the Hannah Montana brother-style wig of Allison’s husband, the horrifying trope of “man trying to f woman on a laptop”, how oversexed this couple is, what it would be like going on a double date with them, car GPS DVD players, what a “theory of evidence” is, faking your own death cause you got drunk, the significance of 4L of blood and SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

In this episode we discuss Maddy aka Lil Miss CBC and her new show, guys who do weasle ball tricks, our upcoming live s*x show (eek), breastfeeding Diet Coke, going to the mall at 5pm on a Friday, whether detention exists in Canada, Liv's dastardly era of terrible extensions, the day Rayban Wayfares entered the chat and changed the world as we know it, rolling your shorts, not having a body that's compatible with bustiers, a cameo from Volchuk, 2010's The Fray-style music, an upsetting cameo from Miranda and SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

In this episode we discuss fun "Emma" (wink) Stone facts, the difference between condos and apartments, summer super sale blowouts of the ass variety, how Jeff Bezos takes care of the customer, the resurgence of Ashlee Simpson, how much Medieval Times hates vegetarians, our new show Jest-Her about the first female jester, when you're a card carrying vegetarian who hates vegetables, how perfect Amanda Bynes is in this role, how these parents are parent goals, whether Emma got a face transplant, trying in vain to style your bangs without a round brush in the era of straighteners, how french immersion kids were basically homeschooled jungle freaks, Christian bullies, self surgery on skin tags and SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!

In this episode we discuss going double (Von) dutch with your friend, some bits we're workshopping, how eating a California Sandwich is like racing against a tidal wave, the way streaming services are trying to send us to the asylum, all the crumbelievable crumbelinas, our universal incredulousness that LC got a spinoff, how downright unlikeable they all are, the utter lack of improv, the need for a study on viewers to look for brain rot, the bombastic payoff from making Audrina wait 2 weeks to go into the pool, the standout performance from the FIDM guidance councillor, the fortitude of Heidi in saying no to retail,  how the hair isn't hairing, whether this show is warfare to lull the masses into submission and SO MUCH MORE!!!

Thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the flip-phone!