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This week on Dam Internet, You Scary!, Tahir is joined by comedian, actor, writer, and content creator  ⁨@MrJayWashington⁩  this episode… man. It starts wild and somehow gets wilder.

We cover everything from Instagram ruining society, Pizza Hut nostalgia, knighted penguins, dolphins with boundary issues, a man who sleeps 300 days a year, a nurse who “lightened his workload” the worst way possible, porn logic, relationship hypotheticals, and the most unhinged analogies you’ll hear all week.

Join our Patreon now!! 

https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

0:00 – Welcome Back + Immediate Chaos

0:51 – Freeballing & Bathroom Podcasting

4:27 – Career Blessings & Christmas Movie

5:05 – Christmas Porn Joke Derailment

6:01 – “Stop One Invention?” → Instagram

8:25 – Food Reviewers & Shucking/Jiving Talk

9:04 – Terry Crews / Fitness Joke

10:33 – Black vs White Porn Titles

10:56 – MAS*H “Spear Chucker Jones” Discovery

12:04 – FACTOR Ad Read

15:20 – Bruce/Caitlyn Transition Joke

16:34 – Instagram’s Evolution to Insanity

18:23 – Twerking Distractions & Discipline

19:27 – Twitter Porn Algorithms

20:35 – Pizza Hut Nostalgia

23:13 – Beaded Curtain Video Store Era

24:05 – Porn Names & Credit Roll Joke

25:26 – Storyline Porn Rant

25:47 – POV Porn… with a Condom

26:16 – “Realistic Porn” Requirements

28:29 – Meta Glasses VR Porn Debate

30:23 – Knighted Penguin Story

31:52 – Brigadier Penguin Explained

32:22 – Dolphins Are Menaces

33:13 – Dolphin Brain Visual

34:01 – Woman in Love with Dolphin Story

35:21 – Woman Who Married a Ferris Wheel

36:29 – IN THE CLOUD Ad Read

39:57 – God Talking at 3AM

40:57 – Negotiating With Noah for Ark Admission

42:22 – Hollywood: Talent vs Value

43:43 – Sugar Baby Logic

45:09 – Sugar Mama Age Limit (83)

46:13 – Slavery Draft Pick Bit

47:18 – German Nurse Who Killed 10 Patients

50:10 – “Lightening the Workload” Breakdown

51:12 – Nursing Home Bed Turnover Reality

53:22 – Uncle Remus vs Harold’s (Chicago Debate)

54:08 – GLD Ad Read

58:42 – Jesus, Mary, Joseph & Theories

1:00:02 – Did Joseph Smash? + Jesus’ Brother James

1:01:18 – Superhead vs Mary Magdalene

1:03:09 – Trailer Park Fight League

1:04:13 – Man Who Sleeps 300 Days a Year

1:05:35 – Could You Care for Someone Like That?

1:06:19 – Partner With No Limbs Hypothetical

1:07:09 – Airline Carry-On Problem

1:08:18 – Box, Packing Peanuts, iPad Playlist

1:09:36 – Playlist for Limbless Bae

1:10:29 – CASH APP Ad Read

1:11:45 – AI Version of Tahir

1:12:20 – Losing Voice & Voice Filters

1:13:14 – Bigfoot Joke + Kids Don’t Watch Dad

1:14:15 – Reverse Cowgirl… Solo Edition

1:15:19 – Dry Jacking vs Lotion Debate

1:16:11 – Jacking Off Using Imagination?!

1:17:05 – Porn Volume vs Neighbors

1:18:32 – Interracial Line Joke

1:18:52 – Hippie’s Editing Hell

1:19:17 – Jay’s Outro + Links