The Art of We

40. How To Start A Conversation About Negative Impact


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To have deeply fulfilling relationships requires that we bring our A-game when it comes to being sensitive to how we impact each other and to bring care when we negatively impact one another. If we are not conscious enough to recognize when we’re having unintended negative impacts on other people or we are not self-aware enough to acknowledge when we’ve been negatively impacted by someone else, we are playing a rookie game when it comes to relationships. 

In this episode, Krista is recording solo, and details what she’s learned about the impact of awareness to keep her relationships as clean, clear, and connected as possible. This includes turning conscious and subconscious burdens into (harder) conversations, two conversation frameworks for addressing and cleaning up negative impact, and tips around feedback and conversation consent.

Krista also shares that sometimes even the most prepared for conversations falter. In those moments, compassion for both you and your partnership is imperative, as is a learning mindset, so we can get stronger as a couple every time we navigate a tender or challenging conversation. “We can do more than I can” is an evolution to get better and learn how to love, respect, and care for each other even more. 

Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, or on your favorite podcast platform. 

Topics Covered:

  • Becoming more aware of our impact
  • Krista’s work from turning a blind eye to developing strong self-awareness
  • The issues with not addressing how we impact each other
  • The power of consent in conversation 
  • Three conversation starters to check if we’ve had negative impact on another
  • Three conversation starters to let someone know we’ve been negatively impacted


Get in Touch: 

  • The Art Of We Website
  • The Art of We Instagram 
  • Integrative Psychiatry Institute: Integrative Mental Wellness & Psychedelic Therapy Training


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The Art of WeBy Krista Van Derveer and Dr. Will Van Derveer

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