The Art of We

47. When One Partner Has Low Grade Depression


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When one partner shows signs of low grade depression, it can sometimes be hard to know how to effectively provide support. If left unaddressed, not only is there an “elephant in the room” but it also can leave unintended negative impacts on the relationship. Often, depression can be viewed as a “problem” that’s usually left up to the person who is experiencing the depression to figure out how to overcome it. Our view is that this approach is ineffective. In this episode we share a myriad of perspectives, causes, and solutions to support the couple to effectively navigate when one partner is experiencing symptoms of depression.

In this episode, we frame low grade depression as something that is a normal part of being human. We illustrate contributing factors that can affect a sense of fulfillment and joy, including the gut-brain connection, unhealthy habits, mis-alignment with values, and toxic environments. We share several tools we’ve used to deal with depression together as a couple, including Dr. Will’s advice from 20+ years of working with patients who have found relief in symptoms of depression.

Our invitation for you this week is to be gentle yet honest with yourself — and your partner — so that you are able to work as a team and address darker periods and find possibility, together. And be sure to head back to episodes 44–46, where we share how and why we sought out external support.  

Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, or on your favorite podcast platform. 

Topics Covered:

  • The three major aspects of depression, from problem to perspective
  • The importance of how we frame and view the depression as a couple
  • Krista and Will share the three top causes of mild depression
  • How not fulfilling your highest values and soul’s purpose can impact your emotions
  • The question for couples about their shared mission
  • The gut-brain connection and its effect on mental health
  • Practices for navigating and supporting depression 
  • The possibility of external support if other tools don’t aid the depression
  • The importance of honesty with yourself and your partner about your depression

Resources Mentioned: 

  • The World Health Organization’s statistic on depression 
  • Receive “3 Game Changing Conversations For Couples” A FREE mini guide for finding new levels of clarity, purpose & potency in partnership
  • The Art of We Episode 44. When To Seek Couple’s Therapy
  • The Art of We Episode 45: Sexologial Bodywork + Somatic Sex Education (with Alyssa Morin)
  • The Art of We Episode 46. This Simple Shift Expands Our Access To Pleasure
  • The Art Of We Weekly Newsletter

Get in Touch: 

  • The Art Of We Website
  • The Art of We Instagram 
  • Integrative Psychiatry Institute: Integrative Mental Wellness & Psychedelic Therapy Training

Rate, Review & Follow on Apple Podcasts: 

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The Art of WeBy Krista Van Derveer and Dr. Will Van Derveer

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