ask a sub

6. Opening Up, People Pleasing and Kink Shame


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This week on the table of sub wisdom is something a lot of subs historically have a past with – people pleasing. There is no magic solution, but Lina does her best to unpack it like the classic algebra problems that we definitely don't miss from highschool (but can we all agree that sexy problem-solving would have made the class a whole lot more fun?) Like what if "X" was monogamy and "Y" was kink–how do we get to "Z"?? And how about if "X" is people pleasing, and "Z" is being a Good sub, what is the value of "Y?" Okay, maybe too far but Lina still gets to the bottom of why people pleasing isn't healthy and how to try to shut it down, stay authentic to yourself, and go on to live your happy submissive life. And finally, Lina discusses what to do if you experience shaming from your friends and/or family about your kinky ways (no algebra here, we promise, just straight facts and support).

Have a question about BDSM, sex, dating, relationships, Dom/sub dynamics, and anything else you'd like to ask Lina? Submit yours by emailing a voice memo to [email protected] - there is no question too bizarre or too basic!

Still thirsty for community? Join us on the Ask a Sub Patreon and have access to the most wholesome and kinky discord community! Check it out over at www.patreon.com/askasub

Get 20% off Lina's Conscious Kink course with code PODCAST at checkout https://www.askasub.com/conscious-kink

You can follow Lina over at @askasub on both Instagram and Twitter!

Make sure to subscribe, drop us a 5-star rating, and tell all your filthy friends about the show!

Host, Producer - Lina Dune | Producer, Editor - Stella Hartmann |

Producer, Research - Caroline Stephens | Music - Dan Molad

Art by Kayleigh Denner

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ask a subBy Lina Dune

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