Here’s a quick show about getting over yourself, inspired by a passage from Tony Robbins called “8 Rules for a Better Life.”

As I read through the rules, I realized they all kind of hearkened back to my old podcast title, Get Over Yourself, which I believe is a quick and effective mantra for happiness, relationship harmony, and continued personal growth instead of getting stuck in ruts and rumination—which seems to be a common problem these days.

I talk about how anxiety comes when we ruminate about the future, depression comes when we ruminate about the past, and how so much of our suffering stems from an obsession with the self rather than a focus on service or growth. I also reference comments from former podcast guest Dr. Ron Sinha, who points out that rumination may actually show up as a measurable disease state, with blood markers and physiological effects to support it.

Along the way, I go through all eight rules with my own commentary and stories from life, sport, competition, parenting, and everyday stress. I reflect on the pressure and self-importance of racing as a professional triathlete in my 20s, share a memorable finish-line exchange with rival Miles Stewart that changed my perspective on blaming and complaining, and talk about why people almost never change their minds no matter how certain you are that you’re right.

I also get into social media giving us “the most intense and graphic scorecards ever in the history of humanity,” my late friend Don Weaver’s hilarious approach to road rage where he would “flip people off five times in a row,” and why happiness and freedom come from growth—not control.

I finish with thoughts on Tony’s idea that changing your body changes your emotional state, while also cautioning against turning that insight into the modern “stay hard” mentality where we feel like we always have to push a tired, exhausted body just to feel worthwhile.

 

TIMESTAMPS:

Actual blood markers can reveal the effects of rumination about the future, which is a common
problem these days. [01:03]

There are eight rules for a better life. Number one is don't judge yourself. [02:20]

Not everything is a matter of life or death. [04:07]

Seek to make a contribution. Self respect comes from making a contribution. [07:17]

Don't get caught up formulating some elaborate life purpose. Do the right thing and your purpose
will unfold. [08:40]

Stop patterns of blaming and complaining. [09:57]

People in situations that push your buttons, provide an opportunity for spiritual growth no matter
what. [17:54]

 

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• Brad Kearns.com
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• The Imperative Habit
• The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck

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