A Farmish Kind of Life

90: when it all makes you mad, who really is in charge?


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**My thoughts were also recorded more in depth in a podcast episode, which you can find by pressing play on the black bar at the top of this post, or by finding episode 90 of the Farmish Kind of Life podcast in your favorite podcast player/podcatcher.**
I was listening back to episode 89 of the Farmish Kind of Life podcast (about the power of raising and growing your own food, even if it's small scale) and it hit me: I’m talking about how every little step towards self-reliance is a step in the right direction—a step away from the system.
And then I started thinking of society as a system. Social media as a system. The mainstream media as a system.
And then through my earbuds while I did chores, I heard myself talk about taking back control of things that are yours to control, and not giving up that power to people who shouldn’t have it.
And then I thought about society and social media and the mainstream media as the system, and I thought about how much all of that fuels our emotion.
And I thought about how much control they get to have to be in charge of our emotions like that.
Hear me out. Because I think we need to make some changes.
If you need to step away, do it. But...
I’ve talked a bit about how it’s important to step away from what you need to step away from when you feel you need to do that. And I still think that’s important. I briefly took social media off my phone. It was an interesting experiment -- but it also brought up a lot of issues.
Stepping away is still an option. Saying peace out and just hanging out in your barn is still a valid solution. But it hit me what if that’s not the only solution? What if right now, the point is that we get to figure out that we don’t have to let the system control our emotions?
Stick with me here.
A point for my conspiracy theory friends
What if making things yucky out there is part of the plan? What if getting the peace makers to say peace out, I can’t deal is part of the plan? What if making social media a negative, dramatic place to be is part of the plan? What if making people angry and panicky and annoyed and frustrated and on edge is part of the plan?
I mean, it's just a thought...
A point for those people who need to be reminded a little something about the Karens and the Facebook Nazis
People who post stuff or say stuff and get you riled up really don’t care that at suppertime you’re still fuming, or that their post made you freak out at your husband or kick your dog or yell at your kids. They. don’t. care.
Seriously. Read that again.
They don’t care, and we’re sucking all that stuff into us and letting it ruin our entire day.
What if us being able to stand in all that stuff and say, “you don’t get to ruin my day” is really about taking control and having power? I don’t mean we yell just as loudly as everyone else about whatever we think. Because when everyone is yelling, no one is hearing anything, and then they just want to yell louder. But what if this is the chance for us to show how much control we actually have over our own life?
And yes, having control can sometimes mean you choose to say “I turn everything off. Right now”. That IS showing you have control over your life. But what if having control over your life is also being able to stand in the midst of opposition or disagreement or chaos and say you don’t get to control how I feel, you don’t get to ruin my day, you don’t get to force me to get up on the wrong side of the bed.
And I do not want to be sing-songy. At all. That’s not me. But maybe this is a time for us to realize how much we do control in our own life. And take back the control of the things we’ve given up.
Like, our emotions. Like our mood.
I walked outside the other day and I looked up at my barn and I was like “wow. Have you seen my barn?” My barn stands here while I’m all angry off at the world and moping around. My amazing barn that I’m so blessed to have that is filled with kitten...
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A Farmish Kind of LifeBy Amy Dingmann

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