Able to Care

In this solo episode of the Able to Care Podcast, Andy Baker explores one of the most misunderstood behaviours in dementia care - pacing, repetitive walking and repeatedly saying “I need to go home”. Instead of dismissing this as “wandering”, Andy invites carers, teachers, parents and support staff to ask a better question: what is this behaviour trying to communicate? This episode looks at how repetitive behaviour can signal anxiety, sensory dysregulation, loneliness, discomfort, purpose, or an unmet need, and why correcting facts too quickly can make distress worse. If you support someone living with dementia, or anyone whose behaviour can become repetitive under stress, this episode offers a more curious, compassionate and practical way to respond.

What this episode covers:

Andy breaks down why repetitive walking is rarely pointless and is often a strategy to cope with stress, regulate the body, solve a problem or meet a need. He introduces a practical framework - See, Feel, Need, Do - to help supporters slow down, spot patterns, consider the emotional driver, identify possible unmet needs and respond in a more helpful way. He also connects this to the Human Motivation Triangle and the HELP model, showing how behaviour may be linked to human, emotional, location-based or physical needs.

Three key messages:

Timestamps:

00:00 - Reframing “wandering” as walking with purpose

Why listen to this episode?

This episode is especially useful if you support someone living with dementia and want to respond more effectively to pacing, restlessness or repeated requests to go home. It is also relevant for parents, teachers and support staff, because the wider principle applies beyond dementia care: repetitive behaviour often communicates stress, discomfort or unmet need. If you want a calmer, more person-centred way to understand behaviour, this conversation will give you practical tools you can start using straight away.

Resources mentioned:

Podcast: Able to Care Podcast

Able social media:

If this episode helped you think differently about behaviour, please follow, share and leave a review so more carers, parents, teachers and support staff can find it.

What does it really mean to belong - and what happens when someone doesn’t?

In this powerful conversation, Andy sits down with Dr Lisa Cherry to unpack one of the most overlooked drivers behind behaviour: the human need for belonging and mattering. Drawing on over 35 years of experience across education, care, and trauma-informed practice, Lisa shares how experiences like school exclusion, care placements, and relational disruption can shape identity, behaviour, and lifelong outcomes.

This episode goes beyond theory. It explores what belonging feels like, how children communicate when they don’t have it, and why behaviour often makes more sense when you stop asking “what’s wrong?” and start asking “where do they belong?”

Whether you’re a parent, teacher, or caregiver, this conversation will challenge assumptions, deepen empathy, and give you practical ways to create environments where people feel seen, safe, and significant.

1. Behaviour is often a search for belonging

2. Fitting in is not the same as belonging

3. Small moments create big impact

00:00 – Introduction and Lisa’s recent work in the US

If you’ve ever thought:

This episode offers a different lens.

It will help you:

Dr Lisa Cherry is an author, researcher, and international trainer specialising in trauma-informed practice and systemic change across education, care, and justice systems.

With over 35 years of experience, Lisa has worked globally supporting professionals to better understand and respond to those living with the legacy of trauma. Her research at the University of Oxford explored how care-experienced adults make sense of belonging.

She is the author of:

You’ll hear a lot in this episode about systems, trauma, and behaviour.

But underneath it all is a simple question worth sitting with:

Who feels like they belong in your world - and who might quietly feel like they don’t?

It’s a phrase heard in classrooms, homes and care settings every day - often said with certainty. But what if that certainty is where we get it wrong?

In this solo episode, behaviour specialist Andy Baker challenges one of the most common assumptions in parenting, teaching and caregiving: that lying is always a conscious choice. Instead, he explores a deeper perspective - that behaviour, including lying, is often a strategy to cope with fear, shame, stress or lack of skills.

Through a relatable school scenario and practical step-by-step guidance, Andy breaks down how our responses can either build honesty… or unintentionally teach children to hide. If you support children or vulnerable individuals, this episode will help you move from reaction to understanding - without losing boundaries.

00:00 – “He’s lying” - the assumption we rarely question

If a child feels safer lying than telling the truth…

Autism can feel overwhelming - not just for the person experiencing it, but for the parents, caregivers and professionals trying to support them.

In this powerful conversation, Andy Baker is joined by Dr Theresa Lyons - international autism educator, Ivy League scientist, and founder of Navigating AWEtism. Blending scientific research with lived experience as a parent, Theresa challenges some of the most common assumptions about autism and offers a different lens: one that focuses on understanding the biology behind behaviour.

Together, they explore why so many families feel lost in conflicting advice, how behaviour can be a form of communication rather than something to “fix”, and what it means to move from overwhelm to clarity. This episode is particularly valuable for anyone supporting autistic individuals who wants a more evidence-informed, compassionate and practical approach.

00:00 – Introduction and setting the scene

Behaviour is not random - it’s communication.

Autism is currently diagnosed by observation - not biology.

Clarity reduces overwhelm.

You’re overwhelmed by conflicting autism advice and want clearer direction

You support a child or adult with autism and want to understand behaviour more deeply

You’re interested in the science behind autism, not just the labels

You want practical ways to support communication, wellbeing and development

You’re looking for hope - without unrealistic promises

Navigating AWEtism Platform – https://navigatingawetism.com

Dr Theresa Lyons’ LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/theresamlyonsphd/

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/navigating_awetism/

TikTok – https://www.tiktok.com/@navigatingawetism

Book reference (Amazon) – https://amzn.to/47nfk24

Podcast: https://www.able-training.co.uk/podcast

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/able-training-support

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abletrainingsupport

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abletrainingsupport

Dr Theresa Lyons is an international autism educator, Ivy League-trained scientist (PhD, Yale), and parent of a child with autism. She is the founder and CEO of Navigating AWEtism, a platform designed to translate complex autism science into practical, actionable strategies for families. She has supported parents in over 21 countries, helping them move from confusion to clarity using evidence-based approaches.

If behaviour is communication…

What if the biggest shift in behaviour support isn’t about techniques… but about how we think?

In this solo episode, Andy Baker explores one of the most underrated skills in caregiving, education and parenting: intellectual humility. The ability to step back and question your assumptions can transform how you understand behaviour - whether it’s a child labelled “attention-seeking”, a student seen as “lazy”, or an adult perceived as “difficult”.

Through relatable stories and practical examples, Andy challenges the way we interpret behaviour, showing how labels can block connection, fuel confirmation bias, and escalate situations. Instead, he introduces a more effective approach built on curiosity, emotional awareness, and understanding the hidden reasons behind behaviour.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, frustrated, or unsure how to respond to behaviour that challenges - this episode will help you see things differently… and respond more effectively.

00:00 - Attention-seeking vs connection-seeking: why framing matters

Labels aren’t explanations - they’re shortcuts.

Behaviour always makes sense… in context.

Curiosity creates connection - and connection changes outcomes.

You’ll rethink common behaviour labels like “attention-seeking”, “lazy”, or “manipulative”

You’ll gain practical tools to reduce conflict and improve communication

You’ll learn how to balance empathy with boundaries

You’ll understand how your mindset directly impacts the people you support

You’ll walk away with a clearer, calmer approach to behaviour that challenges

The Able Target System – A structured approach to behaviour support, de-escalation, and reflection

Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge – Andy Baker’s book

The Adaptive Caregiver (coming soon) – A model focused on improving wellbeing and quality of life through adaptive support

Website: https://www.able-training.co.uk/podcast

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/able-training-support

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abletrainingsupport

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abletrainingsupport

If the behaviour makes no sense to you… is that about them - or about the limits of your current understanding?

When people think about care homes, they often picture routines, medication, and maybe a bit of bingo. But what if the most important part of care is the part we can’t easily measure?

In this episode, I’m joined by Surraya Sadr, Head of Wellbeing and Lifestyle at Mindful Care, to unpack what wellbeing in care settings really means - especially for those supporting people living with dementia.

We explore the emotional reality of being the person everyone leans on, why wellbeing roles are often misunderstood or undervalued, and how small everyday moments - not big activities - are what truly shape quality of life.

If you’re a parent, teacher, caregiver or support professional, this conversation will challenge how you think about behaviour, connection and what “good care” actually looks like.

Surraya brings a powerful blend of experience across youth work, occupational therapy and dementia care.

Former Dementia Care Coach in the NHS

Led wellbeing across 40+ care homes and 50 staff

Finalist at the National Dementia Awards (Best Wellbeing Lead)

Now Head of Wellbeing & Lifestyle at Mindful Care

Her work focuses on improving dementia care, staff wellbeing, and practical, person-centred approaches that actually work in real settings.

Mindful Care: https://mindful-care.co.uk/

Wellbeing Forum (April 2026 – Anglia Ruskin University, Cambridge)

Email Surraya: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abletraining/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abletrainingexperience

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/able-training-ltd-/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@abletocarepodcast

If someone doesn’t feel safe, connected or understood, no amount of task-based care will meet their needs.

The conversations, the noticing, the small adjustments - this is where real care happens, but it’s rarely measured or valued.

Burnout doesn’t arrive loudly. It creeps in through disconnection, anxiety and emotional exhaustion - and many carers ignore it until it’s too late.

00:00 – Introduction

If you’ve ever:

Felt like behaviour is misunderstood or labelled too quickly

Been the one “holding everything together” for others

Struggled with burnout, guilt or emotional exhaustion

Wondered how to better support someone living with dementia

Questioned why care systems focus more on tasks than people

This episode will give you a different lens.

Not a perfect framework. Not a checklist.

But a more honest, human understanding of what care really requires.

Surraya said something that stuck:

“It’s not about big activities. It’s about the everyday moments.”

And maybe that’s the challenge for all of us.

Are we focusing on what’s visible…

Most behaviour doesn’t “come out of nowhere”. Whether you’re caring for a loved one with dementia, supporting a child with big emotions, or working in health, education or social care, there is nearly always a click, click, click moment before things escalate. In this episode, Andy Baker breaks down how to recognise early signs of distress, why logic often fails when the nervous system is activated, and what to do in those crucial seconds before behaviour takes off.

For caregivers, teachers and parents, this episode offers practical tools for calmer responses, safer environments and stronger relationships – without slipping into control, shame or endless firefighting.

If you ever find yourself thinking:

“It came out of nowhere”,

“They go from 0–100 instantly”, or

“Nothing I say gets through”…

…this episode gives you a different lens. You’ll learn how physiology drives escalation, how to reduce triggers you can influence, and how small adjustments can prevent big incidents. This is for anyone who wants fewer meltdowns, calmer homes, more regulated classrooms, and safer care settings.

Behaviour escalates physiologically long before it escalates visibly – if we miss the cues, we miss the opportunity.

Connection beats correction in the early stages – logic only works once the nervous system feels safe.

If you want fewer “big” incidents, get obsessed with the “small signals” – curiosity is the most underused de-escalation tool.

Andy’s book Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge

Able Training courses on behaviour management and de-escalation: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

In this powerful and heart-opening episode, Andy sits down with Ruth Thompson, who leads the dementia carer support services at Dementia Adventure. Ruth has spent years helping families understand dementia in a way that is honest, human and full of possibility. Together, they explore what carers most fear, how to see the person behind the diagnosis, why communication needs to change, and how even the smallest “adventures” can rebuild confidence for both the person living with dementia and the carer supporting them.

This episode is especially meaningful for caregivers, teachers and parents who want to better understand behaviour, reduce anxiety, build trust and reconnect with the person they support. Ruth offers practical tools, lived experience, and gentle reframes that help families breathe again – without pretending the journey is easy.

Dementia Adventure (organisation homepage): https://dementiaadventure.org

Unpacking Dementia – Facebook Live Series: https://dementiaadventure.org/unpacking-dementia/

Friends & Family Support Sessions: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ruth-thompson-677454227/

Email Ruth: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

The person is still there. The relationship is still there. What needs to change is how we approach communication, expectations and support.

Guilt is common – but unsustainable. Carers must learn to accept help, create small adventures for themselves, and celebrate small wins.

It doesn’t have to be a holiday. A cup of tea in the garden, a walk around the block or listening to old music together can reconnect identity, memory and emotion.

00:04 – Welcome to Ruth

01:20 – What does dementia adventure really mean?

02:51 – Explaining dementia honestly but without hopelessness

05:10 – What unpaid carers fear most

07:28 – “Seeing the person before the condition” in real life

09:39 – Staying curious about who the person is now

12:12 – The power of shared support

13:10 – Moving from labels to understanding behaviour

15:08 – Boundaries that protect rather than punish

16:19 – Accepting help without guilt

17:05 – Is it still safe to go on holiday with dementia?

18:41 – A powerful story of trust-building and anxiety reduction

23:46 – Why change of environment sometimes helps

26:21 – Long-term benefits of adventure

27:53 – The impact on carers

30:14 – Community, connection and ongoing relationships

32:30 – What levels of need can be supported?

35:46 – The guilt conversation

40:16 – Most common questions on Facebook Live

41:32 – Small local adventures anyone can try

43:10 – Why familiar adventures still count

46:58 – Tiny adventures to big adventures

48:21 – What research is teaching us

51:22 – Why person-centred care isn’t new – but still isn’t universal

52:13 – Final advice: one small adventure this week

If you’re supporting someone living with dementia – professionally or personally – this episode will remind you that:

You are not alone.

You don’t need a magic wand.

Behaviour makes sense when you understand the need beneath it.

Small changes in communication often unlock big wins.

You deserve care, rest, boundaries and moments of joy too.

Ruth brings compassion, clarity and practical wisdom to a subject many people whisper about but desperately need help with.

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ruth-thompson-677454227/

Dementia Adventure: https://dementiaadventure.org

Unpacking Dementia Lives: https://dementiaadventure.org/unpacking-dementia/

Podcast website: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

Violence and high-risk behaviour aren’t “just part of the job” – yet many caregivers, support workers and educators quietly accept them as unavoidable. In this solo episode, Andy challenges that belief head-on. Using a real-world adult-care scenario, he explores what truly drives escalation, why incidents often look sudden even when they aren’t, and how teams unintentionally slip into blame, shame and control rather than prevention, planning and compassion.

This episode gives parents, teachers and paid or unpaid carers a clear, practical lens for understanding risk: how to catch behaviours at “2 or 3” instead of “10”, how to hold boundaries without punishment, and how to replace firefighting with detective-level prevention. Whether you support children, adults with complex needs, or older people living with dementia, this message applies across the board: safety is a design choice, not wishful thinking.

Able Target System – Shared language and proactive planning for behaviour support.

Train-the-Trainer programmes – Behaviour, physical intervention, and safer de-escalation training.

Free resources & episodes: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

When staff internalise danger as inevitable, burnout, turnover and defensive cultures follow.

Most incidents become “unmanageable” because the early warning signs at 2, 3, 4 and 5 were missed, dismissed or deprioritised.

You can keep people safe, uphold expectations and act firmly – without humiliating, punishing or controlling those you support.

00:00 – Naming the problem

00:23 – Episode focus

00:37 – The scenario

00:55 – The myth of “nothing works with him”

01:17 – Missed opportunities at 2, 3, 4, 5

01:35 – “No time” becomes an escalating factor

02:08 – Shame, blame and defensive reporting

02:57 – Intellectual honesty in incident review

03:02 – Control mode in crisis

03:34 – When staff feel unheard

03:43 – The core problem: prevention is undervalued

04:06 – Detective mode vs firefighter mode

04:50 – The danger of living in “firefighter mode”

05:21 – Boundaries without punishment

05:58 – When safety becomes control

06:19 – Applications across sectors

07:04 – Schools: consequence overdrive

07:52 – Parenting: avoiding “daily enforcement mode”

07:49 – Trauma and misinterpreted control

07:57 – Dementia care: prevention wins again

08:05 – Designing systems, not depending on heroics

08:21 – The Able Target System

08:33 – Closing message

This episode is for anyone who has ever felt:

“We only ever get called when it’s already a crisis.”

“I’m scared to set boundaries in case I escalate things.”

“We’re reacting all day and never getting ahead.”

“I love this work, but I’m exhausted by constant firefighting.”

Andy gives you practical tools to shift from reaction to prevention, challenge unhealthy workplace norms, and hold boundaries with humanity. You’ll walk away with a clearer sense of how to keep yourself safe, support others with dignity, and reduce the emotional load on teams, parents and caregivers.

Podcast Website: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

Most cardiac arrests happen where we least expect them – at home, often in front of the people we love. Yet so many parents, carers, teachers and support workers quietly fear they’d freeze, forget what to do, or make things worse. This week’s guest, Rob Jones, understands that fear more intimately than most. Rob survived a sudden cardiac arrest in the middle of the night because his wife Ruby began CPR on their bedroom floor. Eighteen minutes later, paramedics took over – but it was her hands that kept him alive.

In this episode, Rob shares the real experience of collapsing without warning, what his family lived through in those terrifying minutes, and what recovery actually feels like when your heart has stopped twice. He explains why CPR training isn’t just a workplace tick-box – it’s a life skill that every home, school and community needs. Rob and his wife now run The Idiopath, using lived experience to train others in CPR, resilience and real-world decision-making under pressure.

This is an honest, hopeful, deeply human conversation that will speak to carers, parents, teachers and anyone who wants to feel prepared rather than powerless in an emergency.

The Idiopath – Website: https://www.theidiopath.com/

The Idiopath – Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theidiopath/

Rob Jones – LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rob-jones-8a2504161/

Contact Rob: https://metro.co.uk/2025/11/25/a-thud-night-started-worst-18-minutes-life-24790076/

Able to Care Podcast Hub: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

Once a heart has stopped, you cannot make the situation worse. Even imperfect chest compressions give someone a chance they wouldn’t otherwise have.

Most cardiac arrests occur at home. CPR training matters just as much for parents, older children, carers and teachers as it does for clinical staff.

Rob explains how trauma reshaped his identity, his energy, his limits and his choices, and how The Idiopath now helps others build practical, everyday resilience.

00:05 – Welcome & opening

00:27 – The night everything changed

01:11 – Ruby’s response under pressure

02:22 – Hearing the 999 call back

03:29 – Processing what happened

04:09 – Waking in hospital

05:55 – 18 minutes of CPR

07:18 – Ambulance arrival and transfer of care

08:29 – Returning to “normal” life

09:41 – When the defibrillator fires

10:38 – Rethinking life, stress and purpose

11:14 – The birth of The Idiopath

12:23 – The fear of doing CPR “wrong”

13:44 – Common myths and barriers

16:34 – Hands-only CPR in real life

18:59 – CPR songs, rhythm and real-world limitations

21:15 – What learners really ask

23:31 – Fear of being sued

24:41 – Why YOU need CPR training

26:03 – Connecting with other survivors

28:07 – When CPR fails

31:23 – Living after cardiac arrest

34:49 – The Idiopath’s five pillars of resilience

37:04 – Why people book CPR after hearing Rob’s story

39:17 – Why small businesses need CPR too

40:28 – One action for listeners

41:32 – CPR as an act of love

43:00 – Teaching children CPR

46:04 – Where to find Rob & The Idiopath

46:35 – Closing message from Andy

This episode is for anyone who has ever quietly wondered:

Would I freeze?

Would I know what to do?

Could I really save someone I love?

Rob’s story strips away the myths, the guilt and the fear around CPR.

You don’t have to be fearless – you just have to be willing.

Podcast Website: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast