Able to Care

Child poverty is not only about hunger or homelessness. It can mean a child missing school because they do not have the right uniform, being unable to join clubs or activities, feeling ashamed to invite friends home, or being excluded from the everyday experiences their classmates take for granted.

In Part 1 of this conversation, Andy Baker speaks with Baroness Ruth Lister about the reality of child poverty in the UK and the impact it has on children’s education, identity, relationships and wellbeing. Ruth challenges common assumptions about poverty and explains why most children living in poverty have at least one parent in paid employment.

This episode will be especially relevant to teachers, caregivers, parents, support workers and anyone working with children and families. It offers a clearer understanding of how financial hardship can sit underneath attendance difficulties, social withdrawal, unmet practical needs and behaviour that may otherwise be judged too quickly.

Andy and Ruth explore:

1. Child poverty affects participation as well as basic needs.

2. Most children in poverty are not living in workless households.

3. Policies aimed at parents are ultimately experienced by children.

Listen if you:

For educators and caregivers, the conversation offers an important reminder to ask what may be happening around a child before treating absence, unsuitable clothing, withdrawal or non-participation as a lack of effort.

00:00 - What child poverty really means

01:59 - School attendance, uniforms and hidden hardship

03:22 - Poverty, belonging and the cost of joining in

04:57 - How many UK children are living in poverty?

06:18 - How poverty is officially measured

07:54 - The reality of in-work poverty

10:23 - Why housing costs matter so much

12:01 - The main drivers of child poverty

14:34 - The Good Society Starts Small

17:20 - The two-child limit and the benefit cap

23:32 - Children should not be punished for circumstances outside their control

25:00 - Universal Credit and working families

A report by Baroness Ruth Lister examining child poverty through redistribution, rights and political resolve.

https://www.compassonline.org.uk/publications/the-good-society-starts-small/

Ruth Lister’s book explores poverty as both a material condition and a lived social experience involving dignity, voice, respect and citizenship.

https://www.wiley.com/en-gb/Poverty%2C+2nd+Edition-p-9780745645971

https://www.lboro.ac.uk/subjects/social-policy-studies/staff/honorary/ruth-lister/

[email protected]

People who are working may still be eligible for Universal Credit or other support. Citizens Advice and local welfare-rights organisations may be able to help families check what they are entitled to receive.

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/

Baroness Ruth Lister is Emeritus Professor of Social Policy at Loughborough University and a leading writer and researcher on poverty, inequality, citizenship and social justice.

She previously worked for the Child Poverty Action Group and has spent decades examining both the economic reality of poverty and the way people experiencing poverty are treated, represented and heard.

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Part 2 continues next Tuesday, exploring the long-term cost of child poverty, poverty-aware schools, migrant families, dignity and practical ways to support parents experiencing hardship.

In Part 2 of this conversation, dementia engagement specialist Florence Tyloo explores how caregivers can adapt activities as a person’s abilities, visual processing and communication change.

Florence challenges the assumption that someone has lost interest simply because they do not immediately participate. The problem may be that they cannot see the equipment, understand the instructions or complete the activity in the way it has been presented.

Andy and Florence discuss how to create achievable challenges, protect a person’s self-esteem and use family knowledge to uncover meaningful roles and interests. They also examine visual-field changes in dementia, the N.U.T.S. framework for reducing stress and why presence matters more than completing an activity correctly.

This episode offers practical ideas for professional carers, activity coordinators, family caregivers and anyone who wants to create more person-centred dementia activities.

Florence explains how she begins with an achievable version of an activity and then gradually increases the challenge. This allows the person to experience early success without removing every opportunity for growth or mastery.

She explores why asking, “What activities are good for dementia?” can lead caregivers in the wrong direction. A better question is:

“What activity is meaningful, achievable and enjoyable for this particular person today?”

Florence also describes how families can help carers understand a person’s history, identity and former roles. Examples include asking a former teacher to help with a dictation exercise or inviting a person who enjoyed reading to read aloud for others.

The episode also examines visual-field changes, contrast and the importance of placing objects where the person can actually see them.

1. Adapt the activity before assuming the person cannot participate.

2. A person’s history provides clues, not restrictions.

3. The quality of the moment matters more than completing the task.

00:00 - Adapting activities as abilities change

03:59 - What activities are good for dementia?

06:42 - When familiar activities become emotionally difficult

09:08 - How families can help identify meaningful activities

10:58 - A former parent helping with schoolwork again

13:13 - Using meaningful roles to reduce repeated questions

16:23 - Understanding visual changes in dementia

19:31 - Adapting the environment rather than blaming the person

21:42 - Revisiting the N.U.T.S. framework

23:37 - Stress is based on perception, not objective reality

27:50 - Offering greater choice and control

29:51 - Letting go of getting the activity right

31:54 - Presence, play and imperfect activities

34:05 - One simple activity to try this week

36:02 - Florence’s workshops and dementia resources

Listen if you:

The conversation will help you replace “They cannot do it” or “They are not interested” with more useful questions:

Florence Tyloo offers dementia-engagement support, training and consultancy for caregivers, families and organisations.

Website:

Email:

Available support includes:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/florence-tyloo-msc-a20519138

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573984471347

Florence’s training explores four common ingredients of psychological stress:

This framework can help caregivers understand both their own stress and the distress experienced by someone living with dementia.

Florence discusses how changes to visual fields, contrast sensitivity and visual processing may affect:

The Adaptive Caregiver Model: Walking With, Not Ahead - A Practical Guide to Dementia Care That Adapts to the Person, Not the Diagnosis

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Adaptive-Caregiver-Model-Practical-Diagnosis/dp/1918283060

The model explores how caregivers can adapt their role and approach around the needs, abilities and lived reality of the individual.

Florence Tyloo is a dementia engagement specialist based in Exeter. She studied psychology in Switzerland and has worked with people living with dementia across Switzerland, the United States and the United Kingdom.

Her professional practice is also shaped by family experience. Florence grew up close to her great-grandmother, who lived with Alzheimer’s disease, and her grandmother now lives with frontotemporal dementia.

Florence works closely with families to create meaningful engagement that maintains connection, reduces stress and helps people living with dementia retain purpose, choice and dignity.

The Able to Care Podcast supports paid and unpaid caregivers, teachers and parents to better understand themselves, understand those they support and navigate the care and education systems.

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If this episode gives you a useful dementia-care idea, please follow the podcast and share it with a caregiver, activity coordinator, family member or colleague who may benefit.

Activities in dementia care should be about far more than filling time. In the first part of this conversation, Andy Baker speaks with dementia engagement specialist Florence Tyloo about how meaningful activities can preserve abilities, reduce psychological stress and help people living with dementia continue to feel capable, valued and connected.

Florence draws on her professional experience in Switzerland, the United States and the United Kingdom, alongside her family experience of dementia. She explains how familiar music, movement, conversation, games and everyday care tasks can become opportunities for connection.

This episode will be particularly valuable for professional carers, unpaid family caregivers, activity coordinators and anyone trying to maintain a relationship with someone whose communication or cognitive abilities are changing.

Florence explains why activities such as bingo can provide cognitive stimulation when they are adapted around the person’s abilities, rather than simply being used to keep people occupied.

She introduces the N.U.T.S. framework for understanding psychological stress:

Florence and Andy also explore how music, singing, movement and familiar helping roles can reduce stress without telling someone simply to “calm down”.

The conversation considers the different dementia-care lessons Florence has taken from working in Switzerland, the United States and the United Kingdom, including relationship-led personal care, individualised activities and protecting a person’s right to make decisions involving risk.

1. Meaningful activity is not simply entertainment.

2. Stress affects everyone involved in dementia care.

3. Connection does not depend upon conversation.

00:00 - What meaningful dementia activities really are

02:14 - Using existing abilities instead of focusing on losses

03:35 - Understanding stress through the N.U.T.S. framework

05:53 - How movement and singing can lower stress

11:14 - What different countries taught Florence about dementia care

13:49 - Making engagement part of everyday care

18:21 - Protecting choice, autonomy and positive risk-taking

20:10 - Rebuilding connection when dementia changes communication

22:54 - Activities as a bridge to the person

26:03 - Creating moments rather than expecting memories

28:56 - Recognising when an activity is increasing stress

Listen if you:

This episode offers a compassionate reminder that successful engagement is not measured by completing an activity perfectly. What matters is whether the person experiences safety, dignity, purpose and connection.

Florence Tyloo provides dementia engagement support, consultancy and practical workshops for professional and family caregivers.

Website:

Email:

Florence offers:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/florence-tyloo-msc-a20519138

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573984471347

Florence refers to the work of Teepa Snow and the Positive Approach to Care, which supports practical, compassionate and ability-focused dementia care.

The framework discussed by Florence is based on the work of neuroscientist Sonia Lupien and the Centre for Studies on Human Stress:

The Adaptive Caregiver Model: Walking With, Not Ahead - A Practical Guide to Dementia Care That Adapts to the Person, Not the Diagnosis

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Adaptive-Caregiver-Model-Practical-Diagnosis/dp/1918283060

Florence Tyloo is a dementia engagement specialist based in Exeter. She studied psychology in Switzerland and has supported people living with dementia in Switzerland, the United States and the United Kingdom.

Alongside her professional experience, Florence grew up close to her great-grandmother, who lived with Alzheimer’s disease. Her grandmother now lives with frontotemporal dementia in the same care home.

Florence’s work focuses on helping caregivers use meaningful activities to maintain connection, reduce stress, empower the person and create positive moments throughout the dementia journey.

The Able to Care Podcast supports paid and unpaid caregivers, teachers and parents to understand themselves, better understand those they support and navigate the care and education systems.

Podcast website:

LinkedIn:

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If this conversation helps you think differently about dementia activities and meaningful engagement, please follow the podcast and share the episode with a caregiver, family member or colleague who may benefit.

In Part 2 of this conversation, Andy Baker continues with Ethan St Pierre, Dr Alice Loving and Azariah Hope to explore what happens when parents and families are watched, assessed and misunderstood by the very systems meant to help them. This episode looks at the impact of labels such as addict, personality disorder or non-compliant, and asks what parents really need in order to feel safe enough to engage. It also digs into parenting after trauma, what support actually helps, why honesty and consistency matter, and how connection before correction should apply not only to children, but to the adults caring for them too. For teachers, caregivers, social workers and parents, this is a powerful discussion about accountability, compassion, system change and the possibility of breaking intergenerational cycles.

Why listen to this episode?

Three key messages:

Timestamps / chapters:

Resources mentioned / relevant links:

Ethan St Pierre

Able to Care / Able Training

Guest background:

In Part 1 of this powerful two-part conversation, Andy Baker is joined by Ethan St Pierre, Dr Alice Loving and Azariah Hope to unpack what people most often get wrong about trauma, behaviour and labels. This episode explores why trauma is not always visible, why it should not be reduced to a single event, and how terms like attention seeking, manipulative, aggressive or perpetrator can block curiosity and shut down healing. For caregivers, teachers, parents and professionals, this is a thoughtful, honest discussion about fear, survival, identity and the danger of mistaking coping strategies for character flaws. If you support children, families or adults who have lived through adversity, this episode offers a more compassionate lens for understanding what behaviour might really be communicating.

Why listen to this episode?

Three key messages:**

Timestamps / chapters:

Resources mentioned / relevant links:

Ethan St Pierre

Guest background:

In this solo episode, Andy Baker explores one of the most common and emotionally loaded challenges in adult care, dementia support, residential services and home care: refusal. Too often, refusal is framed as non-compliance, defiance or “being difficult”. But what if refusal is actually communication? What if the behaviour is not about aggression, but about fear, vulnerability, pain, sensory overload, loss of control or a threat to dignity?

This episode is especially relevant for paid and unpaid caregivers, support workers, care staff, parents and educators who want to better understand the people they support rather than simply control behaviour. Andy breaks down how personal care can feel threatening, why task-focused approaches can make things worse, and how a calmer, more relational response can reduce distress, protect trust and improve cooperation over time. He also introduces a practical framework - the 6 Cs - to help carers think more clearly in the moment and respond with more empathy, consistency and skill.

If you support someone who resists help, becomes distressed during care, or reacts strongly to tasks like washing, dressing, medication or personal support, this episode will help you:

understand why refusal is often communication, not simple defiance

reduce distress without power struggles or force

protect dignity, trust and emotional safety during care tasks

reflect more effectively on what is really driving resistance

use the 6 Cs to improve care planning, consistency and outcomes

Refusal is communication, not just non-compliance.

If you force the task, you may lose trust.

Better care starts with curiosity, not control.

00:00 - Refusal is communication, not just non-compliance

00:30 - The scenario: when personal care turns into an incident

01:15 - Why personal care can feel like a threat

02:58 - The 6 Cs: a practical framework for understanding refusal

03:10 - Comfort

03:32 - Consistency

05:55 - Connection before solution

07:02 - Choice, competency and challenge

09:19 - A better practical approach to refusal

11:04 - If they escalate, do not double down

12:52 - Refusal is data

Able Training - behaviour management, care training and practical support for professionals and services

Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge by Andy Baker

The Adaptive Caregiver Model: Walking With, Not Ahead: A Practical Guide to Dementia Care That Adapts to the Person, Not the Diagnosis

Website: able-training.co.uk/podcast

If someone refuses personal care, medication or support, it is easy to focus on the task and miss the message. But behaviour is often the clearest communication a distressed person has. When we slow down, get curious and ask what has made this feel threatening, we give ourselves a better chance of responding with dignity, compassion and skill.

If this episode helped, please like, follow, share or comment so more caregivers, parents, teachers and support staff can access the conversation.

In Part 2 of this two-part conversation, Andy Baker continues his discussion with Rhiannon Hughes, exploring how her lived experience in care now shapes the way she recruits staff for children’s homes - and why that matters so much. Rhiannon shares what she looks for beyond a CV, the difference between an adult who simply works in a children’s home and one who genuinely changes a child’s life, and why consistency, emotional steadiness and therapeutic care matter more than ever. This episode will be especially valuable for residential childcare staff, managers, foster carers, social care leaders, and anyone interested in trauma-informed practice, workforce development and improving outcomes for children in care.

In this episode, we explore:

Three key messages from this episode:

Timestamps / Chapters:

Why listen to this episode:

Resources mentioned / useful links:

Follow Able / Able to Care:

In Part 1 of this two-part conversation, Andy Baker speaks with Rhiannon Hughes about her lived experience of growing up in care in both the UK and Spain, being separated from siblings, surviving instability, and carrying adult responsibilities from a very young age. Rhiannon shares what care felt like from the inside, what she needed most from the adults around her, and how trauma, inconsistency and loss shaped her journey. This episode will resonate with paid and unpaid caregivers, teachers, foster carers, parents and anyone supporting children with trauma, attachment needs or care experience. It is an honest, moving conversation about grief, survival, resilience and why the right adult relationships matter so much.

In this episode, we explore:

Three key messages from this episode:

Timestamps / Chapters:

Why listen to this episode:

Resources mentioned / useful links:

Follow Able / Able to Care:

Coming next:

Phones, screens, devices and social media are now part of everyday life for children and young people - but the arguments, sleep disruption, emotional fallouts and power struggles that come with them are leaving many parents, carers and professionals unsure what to do next. In this solo episode, Andy Baker explores why simply taking a phone away might bring short-term compliance but can also create long-term resentment, covert behaviour and bigger escalations. Instead of asking only how to stop screen use, Andy unpacks what the phone may actually be doing for a young person - whether that is offering connection, comfort, control, competence, distraction or dopamine regulation - and why that matters if we want to create real change. This episode will be especially useful for paid and unpaid caregivers, teachers, support staff and parents who want a more thoughtful, practical and trauma-informed way of managing screen-related behaviour.

1. The phone is often not the real problem

2. Punishment may stop the behaviour briefly, but it rarely teaches regulation

3. Better boundaries are built through calm planning, collaboration and repair

If you support a child or young person who becomes dysregulated around phones, social media, gaming or screen time, this episode will help you think more clearly and respond more effectively. Rather than relying on threats, bans or constant arguments, Andy offers a more nuanced way of understanding behaviour that fits real family life, care settings and educational environments. It is a practical listen for anyone trying to balance healthy boundaries with empathy, emotional safety and long-term skill building.

00:00 Why taking a phone away can create more problems than it solves

Free resource from Andy Baker

Able Training website

Andy’s book

Website: able-training.co.uk/podcast

If you’ve ever found yourself in a stand-off over a phone, this episode will help you step back, understand what is really going on, and build a more thoughtful plan that supports regulation, safety and healthier long-term habits.

In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, Andy Baker speaks with Carmel Saulbrey, Managing Director of Niche Care Homes and founder of The Kindness Code, about what it really takes to build strong, resilient teams in children’s residential care. This conversation explores the emotional demands placed on staff, why therapeutic care is about far more than specialist interventions, and how kindness, consistency and workforce development can change outcomes for both children and the adults supporting them. If you are a caregiver, teacher, parent, foster carer or support professional interested in trauma-informed practice, therapeutic care, staff wellbeing, and children’s residential homes, this episode offers practical insight and real honesty.

Andy and Carmel explore what makes a children’s home truly therapeutic on a day-to-day level, why staff burnout and turnover are such major issues in residential care, and how even good, caring adults can struggle under pressure when supporting children with trauma. Carmel shares why she believes kindness should be treated as a professional standard, not a soft extra, and explains how The Kindness Code was created to help staff practise therapeutic responses, build confidence, and embed training in real-life scenarios.

If you work with children who have experienced trauma, this episode will help you think more deeply about:

This is a thoughtful episode for anyone who wants to build safer relationships, stronger teams and more consistent care.

1. Therapeutic care is lived in the small moments.

2. Kindness is not weakness.

3. If we care for the team, the team can care for the children.

00:00 - Introduction and Carmel’s journey into children’s residential care

Carmel Saulbrey is the Managing Director of Niche Care Homes and founder of The Kindness Code. She is passionate about improving outcomes in children’s residential care by strengthening workforce development, supporting staff wellbeing, and helping teams embed therapeutic practice consistently. Carmel believes that by investing in compassionate, confident and well-supported teams, we create better environments for children and the adults who care for them.

Website: able-training.co.uk/podcast