Able to Care

What if one of the most powerful tools in dementia care is something as ordinary as a favourite mug, a set of keys or the ability to wash up your own cup?

In Part 1, Andy Baker speaks with Chartered Psychologist and dementia specialist Dr Kellyn Lee about Material Citizenship - an evidence-based approach that looks at how everyday objects, routines and possessions help people living with dementia maintain identity, dignity, agency and a sense of belonging.

Kellyn explains why families and care professionals can unintentionally remove meaningful parts of someone’s life when trying to help, and why the things we dismiss as mundane may actually be some of the most important. The conversation explores moving into a care home, psychological safety, meaningful activity, over-stimulation and why people living with dementia do not need to be constantly entertained.

For professional caregivers, family carers and anyone supporting someone living with dementia, this episode offers a practical way to think differently about person-centred dementia care, meaningful activity and maintaining independence.

1. Pay attention to the ordinary things.

2. Behaviour can be a reasonable response to the environment.

3. Meaning does not require entertainment.

Listen if you:

Support someone moving into a care home

Work in dementia or residential care

Want to make dementia care more genuinely person-centred

Struggle to know which possessions matter when someone moves

Want alternatives to constantly organising activities and entertainment

Support someone experiencing distress in an unfamiliar environment

Want to maintain independence, routine and identity for longer

Are a family caregiver wondering how to make a care environment feel more like home

One of the biggest takeaways is simple: do not only ask what someone treasures - notice what they actually use.

00:00 - What is Material Citizenship?

00:34 - Why your favourite mug matters more than you think

04:30 - When removing an object creates greater risk

06:41 - Where Material Citizenship came from

08:55 - The flask of tea that changed a relationship

13:40 - Dementia is cognitive, but the experience is emotional

16:11 - Is it dementia, or a reasonable response?

18:28 - What should families pack for a care-home move?

21:09 - “You don’t need that - we already have one”

24:48 - Do people with dementia need constant activities?

27:25 - Meaningful work, chores and purpose

30:43 - The invisible boundaries inside care homes

33:09 - Why caring has become associated with being busy

34:36 - Sitting with someone is still care

35:34 - End of Part 1

Kellyn is a Chartered Psychologist and Psychotherapeutic Therapist specialising in dementia care for people living with dementia, family carers and professional caregivers.

Website:

LinkedIn:

Instagram:

TikTok:

Material Citizenship is Kellyn’s evidence-based framework for supporting people living with dementia to retain:

Identity

Agency

Dignity

Familiar routines

Meaningful roles

Access to everyday possessions

The approach is used within care homes, day services and dementia support.

Kellyn mentions two short YouTube animations explaining Material Citizenship - one aimed at families and one focused on care homes.

Search YouTube for Ask Dr Kellyn dementia videos.

Kellyn is also writing a book exploring Material Citizenship and its development through her research and dementia-care practice.

Dr Kellyn Lee is a Chartered Psychologist and Psychotherapeutic Therapist with more than 15 years’ experience in dementia research and applied practice.

She has worked with institutions including the University of Southampton, London School of Economics, University of Oxford and University of Portsmouth.

Kellyn created Material Citizenship and is founder of The Dementia Care Hub, a whole-system approach designed to improve transitions into care, reduce distress, strengthen family relationships and support connected, person-centred dementia care.

She also delivers training, consultancy and education to organisations and families supporting people living with dementia.

Podcast:

LinkedIn:

Instagram:

TikTok:

YouTube:

Part 2 continues next Tuesday, exploring why presence is real care, how risk aversion can restrict people unnecessarily and how everyday objects can turn human rights into practical dementia care.

In Part 2 of Andy Baker’s conversation with Jayne Sibley, the discussion moves from recognising financial vulnerability to practical ways families can respond.

Jayne explains how Sibstar was created to solve the problem she faced while supporting her own parents - how to allow someone to continue shopping, visiting the hairdresser, buying a coffee or choosing their own Christmas presents without exposing their full bank balance to fraud, overspending or exploitation.

The conversation explores practical safeguards such as spending limits, restricting cash withdrawals or online purchases, real-time notifications and monitoring unusual spending. Andy and Jayne also discuss the wider need for financial services to better support adults who may be vulnerable while still recognising their right to independence.

Jayne also shares her experience of taking Sibstar onto BBC’s Dragons’ Den, where the business secured investment from Deborah Meaden and Sara Davies.

1. Financial independence and financial safety can coexist.

2. Prevention is better than trying to recover lost money.

3. Take one step at a time.

Listen if you:

This episode offers a more balanced way of thinking about financial support - not “Can they manage money or not?”, but “What can they still manage safely, and where do they need support?”

00:00 - What problem was Sibstar designed to solve?

00:16 - Creating safer everyday spending

02:31 - Spending limits, cash withdrawals and online purchases

03:17 - Keeping normal routines and independence

05:08 - Designing Sibstar with the people who use it

06:45 - How spending notifications can help families

08:16 - Preventing financial harm before it happens

08:44 - Financial vulnerability beyond dementia

10:44 - Normalising financial support

11:39 - What banks and financial services could do better

14:06 - What happens when children’s banking support ends at 18?

15:48 - Why Jayne believed the solution needed to exist

16:24 - Taking Sibstar onto Dragons’ Den

18:49 - Deborah Meaden and Sara Davies invest

20:24 - The impact of serious financial fraud

22:10 - What families can do this week

24:13 - “If I bring up money, I’ll upset them”

26:07 - Lasting Power of Attorney and other options

29:38 - What’s next for Sibstar?

30:46 - How to find Sibstar and get support

Sibstar

Website: https://www.sibstar.co.uk

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sibstar_card/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayne-sibley-24ab1444/

Email: [email protected]

Jayne and Sibstar have featured on BBC’s Dragons’ Den, and Jayne’s onboarding information also highlights media work around financial inclusion and dementia. 

Jayne Sibley is the Co-founder and CEO of Sibstar, a female founder in fintech and a family carer with lived experience.

Her work centres on one question many families eventually face:

How do I keep someone financially safe without unnecessarily taking away their independence?

Her experience began with dementia, but her work now supports the broader conversation around financial vulnerability for people with learning disabilities, mental health conditions and those in recovery from addiction. 

Podcast: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/able-training-ltd-/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/AbleTraining

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abletocarepodcast

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@abletocarepodcast

If this episode makes you think of someone who may be becoming financially vulnerable, share it with them or their family before a crisis forces the conversation.

Money can become one of the most difficult areas for families to navigate when someone they love becomes more vulnerable.

In Part 1, Andy Baker speaks with Jayne Sibley, Co-founder and CEO of Sibstar, about the early signs that someone may be struggling to manage money safely, including repeated purchases, unusual cash withdrawals, overspending and increased vulnerability to scams.

Drawing on her lived experience supporting both of her parents with dementia, Jayne explores how families can start difficult conversations about money without creating shame, embarrassment or a sense of being controlled. Andy and Jayne also discuss the difficult balance between financial safeguarding, dignity, choice and independence.

Although Jayne’s own journey began with dementia, the same challenges can affect families supporting someone with a learning disability, mental health condition or someone in recovery from addiction. 

1. Notice changes early.

2. Talk before there is a crisis.

3. Safeguarding should not automatically mean taking over.

This episode is particularly useful if you:

For family caregivers especially, this episode tackles the uncomfortable transition where you may begin to feel responsible for protecting someone who has always been independent.

00:00 - Early signs that money may be becoming a problem

01:58 - How dementia can affect everyday financial decisions

03:36 - How to talk to a parent about money

05:17 - Choosing the right moment

06:17 - Why you shouldn’t wait for a crisis

07:20 - Jayne’s experience supporting her parents

09:21 - Independence versus safeguarding

12:56 - Scams and financial vulnerability

13:49 - Financial vulnerability beyond dementia

15:31 - Romance fraud, investment scams and exploitation

17:08 - The emotional impact of being scammed

19:08 - When is it time to step in?

20:40 - The question that guided Jayne: “Is my mum safe?”

21:11 - End of Part 1

Sibstar

Website: https://www.sibstar.co.uk

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sibstar_card/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayne-sibley-24ab1444/

Jayne has also appeared on Dragons’ Den and has featured in media discussing financial inclusion and dementia. 

Jayne Sibley is the Co-founder and CEO of Sibstar and a family carer with lived experience.

She created Sibstar after years of helping both of her parents, who live with dementia, manage their money. Unable to find a simple way to keep them financially safe while protecting their independence, Jayne decided to build one herself.

Today, she advocates for protecting vulnerable adults without unnecessarily removing their independence and for widening the conversation about financial vulnerability beyond dementia. 

Podcast: https://able-training.co.uk/podcast

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/able-training-ltd-/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/AbleTraining

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@abletocarepodcast

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@abletocarepodcast

Part 2 continues next Tuesday, looking at practical ways to create safer spending, how Sibstar works and what families can do before financial vulnerability becomes a crisis.

In Part 2 of Andy Baker’s conversation with Rebekah Pierre, the discussion moves from how professionals write about children to how care-experienced people can have greater ownership over their own stories.

Rebekah explores what genuinely respectful care records could look like, including transparency, the right to reply and recording the ordinary, joyful moments of childhood rather than creating a permanent “lowlight reel”.

The conversation also explores Rebekah’s acclaimed anthology Free Loaves on Fridays, which brings together the voices of 100 care-experienced children and adults. Rebekah explains why meaningful participation must go much further than inviting someone with lived experience to deliver an emotional keynote and then sending them home.

For social workers, foster carers, residential childcare professionals, teachers, managers and anyone commissioning lived-experience work, this episode provides practical challenges around voice, consent, power, tokenism and psychological safety.

Andy and Rebekah explore:

1. Children should be written with, not simply written about.

2. Childhood records need ordinary moments too.

3. Lived experience participation must involve power, not just presence.

Listen if you:

The episode asks an important question: if someone gives you part of their story, what responsibility do you have for how you hold, use and act upon it?

00:00 - What should professionals think about when writing care records?

00:22 - Centre the child, not the inspection

02:33 - Children know they are being written about

04:07 - Writing with children instead of about them

05:20 - The right to reply

07:25 - Recording the ordinary moments of childhood

09:54 - Free Loaves on Fridays

10:22 - Why the book had a no-rejection policy

12:39 - The response to the book

14:08 - Meaningful participation versus tokenism

16:26 - Why is it called Free Loaves on Fridays?

20:27 - Psychological safety for lived-experience contributors

22:18 - If Rebekah could change care records tomorrow

23:08 - Is it kind, necessary and helpful?

24:05 - What comes next for Rebekah?

Free Loaves on Fridays: The Care System as Told by People Who Actually Get It is an anthology edited by Rebekah Pierre featuring the voices of 100 care-experienced children and adults.

The project was designed around a no-rejection policy, helping people who may never ordinarily have access to publishing tell their own stories in their own voices.

Free Loaves on Fridays

Training, consultancy and keynote support are available through:

Rebekah Pierre's website

Contact: [email protected]

Rebekah Pierre on LinkedIn

Rebekah has written extensively about care experience and children’s social care.

Rebekah Pierre's Guardian profile

Read the open letter through BASW

Rebekah currently works as Deputy Director of Article 39, which campaigns for the rights of children living in institutional settings.

Before finalising a record, Rebekah suggests considering:

Is it kind?

These questions can apply beyond social work - including school records, incident reports, safeguarding notes, care records and any professional documentation that may contribute to someone else’s lasting story.

Rebekah Pierre is a care-experienced author, registered social worker, award-winning campaigner, trainer and consultant.

Her work focuses on children’s rights, care records, language, cultural competence, meaningful participation and improving how services work alongside children and adults with lived experience.

Her book Free Loaves on Fridays amplifies 100 care-experienced voices and challenges a system in which children have traditionally been written about far more often than they have been invited to write for themselves.

Podcast: able-training.co.uk/podcast

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/company/able-training-ltd-/

Instagram: instagram.com/AbleTraining

TikTok: tiktok.com/@abletocarepodcast

YouTube: youtube.com/@abletocarepodcast

If this conversation changes the way you think about records, language or lived-experience participation, please share it with a social worker, foster carer, teacher, residential childcare professional or service leader who may benefit.

A care record might feel like an administrative task to the professional writing it, but for a care-experienced person it can become part of the story they use to understand their childhood decades later.

In Part 1 of this conversation, Andy Baker speaks with care-experienced author, social worker, campaigner and trainer Rebekah Pierre about the lasting impact of language in children’s social care records.

Drawing on both professional experience and the deeply personal experience of accessing her own care files, Rebekah explains how factual inaccuracies, misspelled names, labels and judgemental language can shape identity, influence future placements and leave adults trying to reconstruct their childhood from records written during some of their most difficult moments.

For foster carers, residential childcare staff, social workers, teachers, parents and anyone recording information about children, this episode is a powerful reminder that the person you are writing about may one day become the person reading it.

Andy and Rebekah discuss:

1. Write for the future reader, not only the current system.

2. Behaviour without context creates labels.

3. Intent does not erase impact.

This episode is particularly valuable if you:

It challenges professionals to move away from records that simply capture what went wrong and towards recording that preserves context, dignity and the humanity of the child.

00:00 - Who will eventually read a child’s care records?

00:42 - Rebekah’s experience of reading her own care files

03:08 - Why care records become so emotionally powerful

04:42 - The lifelong impact of labels

07:11 - Attention seeking, attachment searching and manipulative behaviour

09:23 - Intent versus impact

10:02 - When records blame children for their own abuse

11:39 - Burnout, secondary trauma and professional judgement

13:01 - Should we record immediately after an incident?

15:40 - AI and children’s social care records

19:05 - Jargon and accessible language

21:02 - Why calling someone simply “mum” can matter

21:52 - End of Part 1

Rebekah provides training, consultancy and keynote speaking around children’s social care, including:

Rebekah Pierre's website

Contact: [email protected]

Connect with Rebekah on LinkedIn

Rebekah discusses the open letter she wrote after accessing her own care records and finding inaccuracies and language that had a profound emotional impact.

Read Rebekah's open letter via BASW

Free Loaves on Fridays: The Care System as Told by People Who Actually Get It brings together the voices of 100 care-experienced children and adults.

Free Loaves on Fridays

Rebekah Pierre is a care-experienced author, award-winning campaigner, registered social worker, trainer and consultant specialising in children’s social care.

With around 16 years of experience working with children and families in the UK and overseas, her work combines professional expertise with direct lived experience.

Rebekah is the editor of Free Loaves on Fridays: The Care System as Told by People Who Actually Get It, an anthology bringing together 100 care-experienced voices.

She is currently Deputy Director of Article 39, a charity defending the rights of children living in institutional settings, and also delivers keynotes, consultancy and training across the children’s social care sector.

Podcast: able-training.co.uk/podcast

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/company/able-training-ltd-/

Instagram: instagram.com/AbleTraining

TikTok: tiktok.com/@abletocarepodcast

YouTube: youtube.com/@abletocarepodcast

Part 2 continues next Tuesday, exploring how children can meaningfully shape their own records, Free Loaves on Fridays, lived-experience participation, psychological safety and moving beyond tokenism.

In Part 2 of Andy Baker’s conversation with Samantha Dholakia, the discussion moves beyond behaviour strategies and into the wider environments that shape children’s emotional wellbeing.

Andy and Samantha explore why schools need to teach far more than academic knowledge, including emotional intelligence, mindset, conflict management and self-regulation. Samantha discusses how modern childhood has changed, why many children are overloaded by information and stress, and why emotional regulation can become a significant barrier to learning.

The conversation also takes a deep dive into belonging. Samantha explains why feeling seen, safe and accepted can profoundly influence behaviour, motivation and identity - and why children who do not experience belonging in families, schools or communities may look for it elsewhere.

This episode is particularly relevant for teachers, parents, caregivers, school leaders and anyone trying to understand why relationships, emotional safety and belonging matter so much for behaviour.

Andy and Samantha explore:

1. Emotional intelligence is a core life skill.

2. Belonging changes behaviour.

3. Harmful behaviour does not necessarily mean a harmful person.

Listen if you:

This episode offers a broader view of behaviour by asking what kind of environments adults need to create if children are going to feel secure enough to thrive.

00:00 - Should emotional regulation be part of the curriculum?

01:09 - Why childhood has changed but education has not

02:06 - The stress carried by adults and children

03:24 - The emotional backpack children bring into school

04:45 - AI versus emotional intelligence

07:18 - Using technology to create more human connection

08:32 - Why belonging matters so much

10:33 - Humans are wired for community

11:39 - Gang culture and the search for belonging

13:52 - Rejection, shame and emotional pain

15:31 - Belonging is a culture, not a policy

16:54 - Family agreements and shared expectations

19:16 - Looking beyond good and bad people

20:46 - The choices that change a life

22:25 - Behaviour as survival

23:59 - Moving from judgement to curiosity

The Behaviour Bank supports schools, nurseries, professionals and parents with ongoing guidance around:

Email:

The system helps adults understand behaviour through regulation, sensory needs, beliefs, communication and the child’s wider environment.

Samantha also hosts The Behaviour Pod, exploring behaviour, emotional regulation and practical strategies for parents and educators.

https://www.youtube.com/@SPDTrainingandConsultancy3216

https://www.linkedin.com/in/samantha-dholakia-142ab57a/

https://www.instagram.com/spdtrainingandconsultancy/

HiPP Organic:

Connect Childcare - Big Feelings, Big Behaviour:

Twinkl:

The Voice of Early Childhood - The Full Emotional Diet:

TTS World of Education podcast:

Samantha Dholakia is CEO of The Behaviour Bank and a behaviour, inclusion and emotional regulation coach, consultant and trainer.

With nearly 20 years of experience in education and a background as a Deputy Headteacher, Samantha supports schools and families to create environments where children can feel emotionally safe, included and capable of thriving.

She is the creator of The Behaviour Balance System™ and The Behaviour Bank™, and her work focuses on helping adults move beyond traditional behaviour management towards approaches based on neuroscience, relationships, emotional regulation and belonging.

Podcast website:

LinkedIn:

Instagram:

TikTok:

YouTube:

If this conversation changes how you think about behaviour, emotional regulation or belonging, please share it with a teacher, parent, caregiver or colleague who may benefit.

What if some of the behaviour strategies adults rely on most are actually making things harder?

In Part 1 of this conversation, Andy Baker speaks with Samantha Dholakia, behaviour, inclusion and emotional regulation specialist and CEO of The Behaviour Bank, about why rewards, sanctions and behaviour charts can sometimes undermine the very behaviours adults are trying to encourage.

Samantha explains the difference between short-term compliance and sustainable behaviour change, why intrinsic motivation matters, and how gamification, collaboration, celebration and compassionate boundaries can create better outcomes. The episode also introduces Samantha’s Behaviour Balance System, which focuses on emotional regulation, sensory needs, relationships and the whole child rather than simply trying to manage behaviour.

This episode will be particularly useful for teachers, parents, caregivers, school leaders and anyone supporting children who struggle with behaviour, emotional regulation, demand avoidance, motivation or belonging.

Andy and Samantha explore:

1. Rewards may create short-term compliance without creating long-term motivation.

2. Behaviour is communication.

3. Boundaries do not need to disappear to become compassionate.

Listen if you:

The episode challenges some familiar behaviour-management assumptions without suggesting that adults abandon structure or expectations.

Instead, the focus is on building environments where children can develop emotional regulation, confidence, intrinsic motivation and sustainable behavioural skills.

00:00 - Can rewards and behaviour charts make behaviour worse?

02:46 - What rewards can do to intrinsic motivation

03:26 - Gamifying everyday tasks

05:25 - Celebration versus reward

07:10 - Why external motivation eventually loses its power

08:42 - Why traditional behaviour psychology can oversimplify children

10:10 - Demand avoidance and the need for control

10:38 - Turning a “no” into a “yes”

14:10 - What is the Behaviour Balance System?

16:21 - Teaching the skills underneath behaviour

18:05 - The Behaviour Bank

19:40 - Useful behaviour versus “good” and “bad” behaviour

21:23 - Building an inner cheerleader

23:59 - End of Part 1

The Behaviour Bank is Samantha’s online behaviour, inclusion and emotional regulation hub for schools, nurseries and families.

It includes:

Email:

Samantha’s Behaviour Balance System focuses on:

https://www.youtube.com/@SPDTrainingandConsultancy3216

https://www.linkedin.com/in/samantha-dholakia-142ab57a/

https://www.instagram.com/spdtrainingandconsultancy/

TTS World of Education podcast:

HiPP Organic expert profile:

Connect Childcare - Big Feelings, Big Behaviour:

Twinkl articles:

The Voice of Early Childhood - The Full Emotional Diet:

Samantha Dholakia is a behaviour, inclusion and emotional regulation specialist with nearly 20 years of experience supporting schools to create emotionally safe and inclusive learning environments.

A former Deputy Headteacher, Samantha is the founder of SPD Training and Consultancy and creator of The Behaviour Balance System™ and The Behaviour Bank™.

Her work helps educators and families move beyond traditional behaviour management towards approaches rooted in neuroscience, emotional regulation, relationships, belonging and inclusion.

She delivers keynote presentations, consultancy, professional development and parent strategy sessions across the UK and internationally.

Podcast website:

LinkedIn:

Instagram:

TikTok:

YouTube:

Part 2 continues next Tuesday, exploring emotional intelligence, the future of education, belonging, rejection, gang culture and why children need more than behaviour management to thrive.

In Part 2 of Andy Baker’s conversation with Lisa Daniels, the focus moves from diagnosis and grief into the day-to-day emotional reality of caring for someone living with dementia.

Lisa and Andy explore why caregivers often feel guilty for needing a break, why saying “I can’t do this today” can actually be a healthy boundary, and how family relationships can become strained when siblings or relatives experience the same dementia journey very differently.

Lisa shares her own experience of feeling relief during COVID when she was temporarily unable to visit her mother in care - and the guilt that came with that relief. The episode also explores family conflict, communication patterns, Transactional Analysis, ego states and how counselling can help families understand why conversations keep breaking down.

This episode is particularly useful for family carers, sandwich carers, professional caregivers and anyone who feels emotionally exhausted, guilty or stuck while supporting someone living with dementia.

Andy and Lisa explore:

1. Boundaries are part of good caregiving.

2. Family members can experience the same dementia journey very differently.

3. Communication patterns matter.

Listen if you:

The episode offers an important reminder that good dementia care is not about sacrificing yourself completely. Sustainable care depends on recognising your own needs, limits and emotional wellbeing too.

00:00 - Why no two dementia journeys are the same

00:18 - Boundaries in dementia caregiving

01:53 - Giving yourself permission not to visit

03:08 - Relief and guilt during COVID

04:14 - Sandwich carers and competing responsibilities

05:25 - Making visits more intentional

07:00 - Connection without conversation

08:06 - Family conflict and sibling dynamics

09:46 - The Drama Triangle

11:33 - Financial decisions and care-home disagreements

12:12 - How counselling can support family relationships

13:00 - What is Transactional Analysis?

14:19 - Understanding Parent, Adult and Child ego states

17:21 - Why dementia conversations can break down

18:54 - What professionals should understand after diagnosis

21:11 - Sameness does not mean identical experience

22:08 - “I don’t know how much longer I can carry this”

23:42 - Counselling as a safe space

25:06 - Finding the right counsellor

27:42 - How to contact Lisa

Lisa offers counselling for:

Website:

Email:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisa-daniels-32214623/

The Dementia Counsellor UK

The Dementia Counsellor.co.uk

Lisa has received local funding to deliver a six-session therapeutic support group for people affected by dementia in Coventry.

Lisa contributes to the Alzheimer’s Society Research Network and supports research into improving the future of dementia care and support.

Lisa also volunteers with The Shakespeare Hospice in Stratford-upon-Avon.

The Adaptive Caregiver Model: Walking With, Not Ahead - A Practical Guide to Dementia Care That Adapts to the Person, Not the Diagnosis

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Adaptive-Caregiver-Model-Practical-Diagnosis/dp/1918283060

Lisa Daniels is a Level 7 Transactional Analysis Counsellor specialising in supporting people impacted by dementia.

Her work combines professional counselling expertise with lived experience of dementia within her own family.

Lisa supports people who have received an early diagnosis, family caregivers, spouses, adult children and sandwich carers. Her work explores grief, identity, difficult family histories, boundaries, relationship conflict and the emotional demands of caring.

She works online and from private practice in Kenilworth and Coventry, as well as within hospice and community settings.

Podcast website:

LinkedIn:

Instagram:

TikTok:

YouTube:

If this conversation resonates with you, consider sharing it with a family caregiver, professional carer or someone navigating a dementia diagnosis who may need to hear that struggling does not mean they are failing.

What happens emotionally when dementia enters a family?

In Part 1 of this conversation, Andy Baker speaks with Lisa Daniels, a Level 7 Transactional Analysis Counsellor and founder of The Dementia Counsellor, about why counselling can be so valuable for people affected by dementia.

Lisa explains how dementia counselling is not about clinically explaining the diagnosis, but about helping people process what the diagnosis means for their identity, relationships, independence and future. The conversation explores ambiguous loss, anticipatory grief, shame, fear, changes in communication and the emotional impact on partners, children and other loved ones.

This episode is particularly relevant for paid and unpaid caregivers, family carers, professionals and anyone supporting someone newly diagnosed with dementia.

Andy and Lisa explore:

1. Grief can begin long before someone dies.

2. The person diagnosed may be grieving themselves.

3. Caregivers are allowed to struggle too.

Listen if you:

This episode may help listeners recognise that dementia affects far more than memory. It can affect identity, independence, relationships, confidence and the stories people hold about themselves.

00:00 - What is dementia counselling?

01:35 - The ripple effect of a dementia diagnosis

02:39 - Shame, communication and losing confidence

04:42 - Is it normal to grieve someone who is still alive?

06:58 - Grieving the future you expected

08:18 - Counselling for the person diagnosed

10:52 - When caregivers feel they have to be strong

12:05 - Caring for a parent you had a difficult relationship with

13:04 - Lisa’s personal journey into dementia counselling

18:21 - What people with dementia may be grieving

22:16 - Helping a father write his daughter’s wedding speech

25:45 - “I shouldn’t feel this way”

28:47 - The emotional load of sandwich carers

31:56 - Why counselling should not only begin at crisis point

Lisa Daniels provides counselling for people affected by dementia, including:

Website:

Email:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisa-daniels-32214623/

The Dementia Counsellor UK

The Dementia Counsellor.co.uk

Lisa works with the Alzheimer’s Society Research Network and has also volunteered within dementia support.

The Adaptive Caregiver Model: Walking With, Not Ahead - A Practical Guide to Dementia Care That Adapts to the Person, Not the Diagnosis

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Adaptive-Caregiver-Model-Practical-Diagnosis/dp/1918283060

Lisa Daniels is a Level 7 Transactional Analysis Counsellor based in Warwickshire. She works online and in private practice in Kenilworth and Coventry, as well as within hospice and community settings.

After more than 20 years in the pharmaceutical industry, Lisa retrained over four years before leaving her corporate role in December 2025 to build her counselling practice full-time.

Her interest in dementia is both professional and deeply personal. Her grandfather lived with dementia, and her mother experienced young-onset dementia. Lisa supported her family through caregiving, grief and loss before specialising in counselling for people affected by dementia.

She is particularly passionate about supporting people newly diagnosed with dementia, their loved ones and sandwich carers managing several caring roles at once.

Podcast website:

LinkedIn:

Instagram:

TikTok:

YouTube:

Part 2 continues next Tuesday, exploring boundaries, caregiver guilt, family conflict, Transactional Analysis and why emotional support after a dementia diagnosis needs to be far more individualised.

In Part 2 of Andy Baker’s conversation with Baroness Ruth Lister, the discussion turns to the wider cost of allowing child poverty to continue and the practical role schools, services, communities and policymakers can play.

Ruth explains why reducing child poverty should be viewed as preventative investment rather than simply an expense. Poverty can affect children’s health, educational opportunities and future employment, while also increasing pressure on schools, local authorities, social care and the NHS.

The episode also explores how schools may unintentionally deepen shame, the importance of poverty-proofing the school day, and the experiences of migrant families who have no recourse to public funds. Ruth discusses why poverty is not only about money but also dignity, rights, relationships and the way people are treated.

This conversation is especially valuable for teachers, carers, parents, social workers and professionals who want to provide support without increasing stigma or making families feel blamed for circumstances beyond their control.

Andy and Ruth explore:

1. Failing to tackle child poverty has a significant long-term cost.

2. Schools and services can either reduce or deepen shame.

3. People experiencing poverty deserve support without judgement.

Listen if you:

The episode offers both a national policy perspective and practical ideas that can be applied in schools, services and everyday interactions.

00:00 - Universal Credit is not only for unemployed families

00:21 - The real cost of failing to tackle child poverty

03:22 - What schools can stop doing

04:40 - Poverty-proofing the school day

06:28 - Practical support through schools and community services

06:51 - What no recourse to public funds means

10:41 - Poverty, dignity and human rights

14:23 - Understanding stigma and discrimination

15:37 - Practical advice for parents who are struggling

18:39 - Reasons for hope and action

20:53 - Closing reflections

https://www.compassonline.org.uk/publications/the-good-society-starts-small/

https://www.wiley.com/en-gb/Poverty%2C+2nd+Edition-p-9780745645971

https://www.lboro.ac.uk/subjects/social-policy-studies/staff/honorary/ruth-lister/

[email protected]

Support with Universal Credit, benefits entitlement, housing, debt and other financial concerns.

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/

The guest information highlights partnership work involving organisations supporting migrants and migrant families affected by immigration-status and public-funds restrictions:

Praxis: https://www.praxis.org.uk/

Information, research and campaigning relating to child poverty and family support.

https://cpag.org.uk/

Families may also be able to seek help through:

Baroness Ruth Lister is Emeritus Professor of Social Policy at Loughborough University. Her work explores poverty, citizenship, gender, inequality and social justice.

A central theme of her work is that poverty should not be understood through income alone. It must also be examined through dignity, participation, voice, rights and the social relationships that shape how people are treated.

Podcast website:

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If this episode helps you understand child poverty differently, please share it with a teacher, caregiver, parent, social worker or policymaker who may benefit from the conversation.